Does complaining make you feel better?

[memoriesbymichelle]

Some people complain more than others, and ALL of us complain or have complained at one time or another. I'm not talking about that type of complaining. I'm more talking about when we complain over and over about the same things. Like when the Israelites were complaining about not having meat and they went on and on and on until finally God gave them meat alright.

When we complain, are we not complaining about what God has allowed in our lives? I think of my children...when they whine and complain over and over again, I really don't feel like doing anything for them in that moment. I want them to be thankful and appreciate what I have already done instead of whining about the one thing they don't have or I haven't done for them.
Thankfully our ways are not God's ways and our thoughts are not God's thoughts, so I'm sure He doesn't view it the way I do, as in He doesn't get tired of us asking. But it does show us in the OT that at times, He does get frustrated with Israel for their complaining, when really they don't listen to Him and do what He says.

SO...is your life better after you complain? Again, I'm not talking about momentary frustration we all experience and I believe that God is OK with those momentary fits we have. I'm talking about something in your life, like maybe an unanswered prayer you've been praying about for a long time, or a situation that hasn't changed and you want it to.

When we complain we are really complaining against God. And trust me I have complained ALOT in my life. The why God why? and Why ME? and why are YOU doing this or allowing this to ME? I get it, I'm not better than anyone, I am on my own journey. It's just something I thought about while reading the word this morning, that maybe we would fare better if we didn't complain as much, and thanked God for what He has already done AND for what He WILL do in the future. What do you think?

 

[dayhiker]

Some of my comments can clearly be taken as complaining. But I view them as me making observations about what is going on in my life and around me. I'm not asking anyone to fix what I observe. What I am asking is people see the 2nd law of thermodynamics in what is happening around us ... for lack of a better way to describe it. ... smile

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

Some of my comments can clearly be taken as complaining. But I view them as me making observations about what is going on in my life and around me. I'm not asking anyone to fix what I observe. What I am asking is people see the 2nd law of thermodynamics in what is happening around us ... for lack of a better way to describe it. ... smile

That's not complaining IMO. I don't see you as the complaining type either. I think you know what I'm talking about. It's the "I'm never gonna be happy until" syndrom wah wah wah wah. Not accepting where you are or what your circumstances are (and that doesn't mean you have to be exstatic about your circumstances either).

 

[blackribbon]

I complain all the time to God about my life...this is DEFINITELY not the life "I ordered"...however, I am not blind to all the good that is there and the evidence that God is in control and praise for that. So I am different than the Isrealites in that I am willing to embrace and live this life even if I don't really like it. I'd probably be better off if I could learn to stop complaining because I'm sure I miss some doors that God would like to open...or maybe I am postponing things because I just can't get to the point where God can trust me to behave properly.

So truthfully, I'd be better off not complaining...but unfortunately, I'm just not there yet.

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

I complain all the time to God about my life...this is DEFINITELY not the life "I ordered"...however, I am not blind to all the good that is there and the evidence that God is in control and praise for that. So I am different than the Isrealites in that I am willing to embrace and live this life even if I don't really like it. I'd probably be better off if I could learn to stop complaining because I'm sure I miss some doors that God would like to open...or maybe I am postponing things because I just can't get to the point where God can trust me to behave properly.

So truthfully, I'd be better off not complaining...but unfortunately, I'm just not there yet.

I hear ya, I haven't "arrived" either but I DO do it alot less than I used to. I used to be chronic but now it's less often but the BBM above made me LOL by the way you worded it, but I DO think it is also true.

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

Just read this

https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/229449_502724836407454_1137160026_n.jpg

 

[exitstageright]

Some people complain more than others, and ALL of us complain or have complained at one time or another. I'm not talking about that type of complaining. I'm more talking about when we complain over and over about the same things. Like when the Israelites were complaining about not having meat and they went on and on and on until finally God gave them meat alright.

When we complain, are we not complaining about what God has allowed in our lives? I think of my children...when they whine and complain over and over again, I really don't feel like doing anything for them in that moment. I want them to be thankful and appreciate what I have already done instead of whining about the one thing they don't have or I haven't done for them.
Thankfully our ways are not God's ways and our thoughts are not God's thoughts, so I'm sure He doesn't view it the way I do, as in He doesn't get tired of us asking. But it does show us in the OT that at times, He does get frustrated with Israel for their complaining, when really they don't listen to Him and do what He says.

SO...is your life better after you complain? Again, I'm not talking about momentary frustration we all experience and I believe that God is OK with those momentary fits we have. I'm talking about something in your life, like maybe an unanswered prayer you've been praying about for a long time, or a situation that hasn't changed and you want it to.

When we complain we are really complaining against God. And trust me I have complained ALOT in my life. The why God why? and Why ME? and why are YOU doing this or allowing this to ME? I get it, I'm not better than anyone, I am on my own journey. It's just something I thought about while reading the word this morning, that maybe we would fare better if we didn't complain as much, and thanked God for what He has already done AND for what He WILL do in the future. What do you think?

Complaing,IMHO.is an "emotional cathartic".If none of us never complained,most of us would have high blood pressure,IMO. Complaing is productive in some cases.Complianing is not productive in some cases.
For example,in an unproductive case,if it rains on the day that one was looking forward to having a picnic,it does no good to sit and whine about the rain.

In a productive case,during the early 1960's,it did a lot of good for black people,in the Southern United States, to complain about how they were being mistreated,thus giving birth to the Civil Rights Movment.

In my life,yes I do complain.But, I stop complaining after I found a solution to the problem.

For example,as a child,I watched the first time runs of the show"Leave It To Beaver". The Cleaver family lived in a nice house, and in a nice neighborhood. I used to complian to my oldest brother,"Why can't we live in a nice house like that? He said something to the affect that, that is how white people live.Well,as I got older, I realized that if I wanted to live in a nice place, and in a nice neighborhood,the solution and the formular are to get serious about my school work,to get a good education,to get a good paying job,so as to not live in the slums anymore. You see? I no longer complain about being black and poor,because I am no longer black and poor. I have found the....... solution.

Why do I make such a big dael of this? Well....when you are told by society ,"Your're nothing......You are good for nothing. You will amount to nothing,You will always be nothing." It is very hard for one to feel good about oneself unless one accomplishes something. It feels so good to prove the naysayers.........wrong!

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

When you complain to other people....some of them might want to help you find those solutions you seek, but most of the time people just want to complain for the sake of complaining. You offer a solution and they give you 50 reasons or analogies why that can't work for them. So it's wasting time complaining if you aren't willing to take some wise counsel over it and you also waste the other person's (who you've been complaining to) time too.
On the other hand if you complained to someone, "man my car is broke it won't start" and the other person says, "I can help you, I'm a mechanic" or "I know someone that can help you" than they are helping you find a solution to your problem.

 

[exitstageright]

When you complain to other people....some of them might want to help you find those solutions you seek, but most of the time people just want to complain for the sake of complaining. You offer a solution and they give you 50 reasons or analogies why that can't work for them. So it's wasting time complaining if you aren't willing to take some wise counsel over it and you also waste the other person's (who you've been complaining to) time too.
On the other hand if you complained to someone, "man my car is broke it won't start" and the other person says, "I can help you, I'm a mechanic" or "I know someone that can help you" than they are helping you find a solution to your problem.

very well put.

 

[Jenster]

Good topic, Michelle. When I read your OP, I imagined someone who is always griping. Nothing is every right. Nothing will make this person happy. They are just stuck being unhappy. So they do what they can to feel better - namely, complain.

I am sometimes afraid I am this person! I don't have the strength to always look on the bright side. There are plenty of times, too many times, when the little annoying things of life will be all I can see. In that way, I am like the Israelites. I have done a lot of soul searching, trying to heal the wounded parts so that I do not feel pushed around by every little "bad thing" that happens. But being resilient is not something I am naturally good at, for whatever reason. So I have finally realized I need to let the Holy Spirit lead me in this area. (His strength makes up for my weakness.)

The "We Give Thanks" thread is a help. At least I can try to develop a better attitude. Maybe the thoughts will come more easily.

On another note, I agree with exitstageright that there are definitely times when complaining and complaining loudly is the only effective way to make change happen.

But in terms of personal gratitude, etc., for what God has done, it is preferable to give God the glory by seeing and acknowledging His goodness to me.

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

Hey Jenster! I think there are times for complaining. There are lots of times I complain, so I am not above this either. And you are right, when I made the OP I was referring to people that complain sometimes, just for the sake of complaining, or maybe to hear themselves speak IDK and for the people that are around them it is exhausting. I don't mind if someone has a problem and they need to complain to get it out and work it out, but it's the one's that you try and help and they always have a "reason" why the advice won't work, or why they are stuck and they never really listen to what is being offered.
We all need to complain, but complaining to God is a whole other issue IMO. When we complain to God we are saying He is not enough, or He didn't do enough, or we can't trust Him all of which is literally a slap in the face to God. Of course we can trust Him, and of course He did enough and of course He is enough.

Sometimes, I just want people to stop and listen to themselves and say.....is my complaining helping the situation? If not, how can I help the situation I am complaining about so I don't have to complain anymore.

My frustration is when people say Why God Why? Or Why me God? Or Why did you let this happen to me God? And believe me I have done this too. I just think now that it is not a place we should be in to question Why to God. That of course is JMO.

 

[Niels]

Rarely. I'd rather take action to remedy a bad situation than complain about it.

 

[dayhiker]

There's a lot of wisdom in that Miles.