do u think this is a sign?

[kevinman]

.

 

[invisiblebabe]

I think "signs" are, with about .000001% exception, a bunch of wishful thinking and overanalyzing.

I once thought God told me who He wanted me to marry.... and the "signs" I saw for this included things as weird as the guy's last name with the word fiancé on a blackboard in class, the morning after I'd prayed about it. It also included dreams about him and his family, with information in those dreams that I didn't know at the time, that I later found out was true.

Then, I met my now ex-fiance.... and there must've been lots of signs there.... after all, the first time we met, we said the same thing at the same time about 13 times in one weekend... and the church sermon that weekend was all about relationships and how God puts people in our lives. Since we didn't end up together, obviously those "signs" weren't indicating we were going to marry.

Anyhow... I'm getting married in August.... and with my fiance, sure there were a few weird occurrences.... like, we found out when we met that we had a mutual friend who went to his high school and goes to my university. And, two of his best friends went to school with my ex fiance. And, we were the same Myers-Briggs personality type, which is something I'm quite interested in, and I was hoping to find a guy of my same type.

So yeah...weird occurrences we consider signs happen all the time... and they're funny... but are they always from God, telling you a specific message? I very highly doubt it.

 

[peanutbutter12]

I think "signs" are, with about .000001% exception, a bunch of wishful thinking and overanalyzing.

Agreed

CJ

 

[kevinman]

its not so much that i saw her name on the paper but the fact that my aunt said it must be a sign, when i had just asked god to send me a sign 15 minutes earlier. plus, its not like i was sitting around waiting for a sign. i had totally forgot about the prayer until my aunt said that and its like it just clicked. i don't know.

 

[plum]

That's a really nifty situation you had there. *grins*
Like Blue said, ask God, not humans. haha. We're just in it for ourselves

 

[invisiblebabe]

its not so much that i saw her name on the paper but the fact that my aunt said it must be a sign, when i had just asked god to send me a sign 15 minutes earlier. plus, its not like i was sitting around waiting for a sign. i had totally forgot about the prayer until my aunt said that and its like it just clicked. i don't know.

like I said.... i prayed at like 1 AM one night about that situation and signs and him being the one God had for me.... and in the morning, I saw the guy's last name and the word fiancé on the blackboard.

I was wrong, and I don't see how your "sign" is any stranger than mine was... and I actually think God is more inclined to give signs if you'd ask Him. Otherwise, who's to know it's not a strange coincidence?

I only make this counterpoint in the intention to help you. I wasted 9 months thinking this guy was "the one" God had for me.... and I ended up getting screwed. I wouldn't want something like that to happen to you.

 

[kevinman]

thank you for your opinions

 

[KristianJ]

Reminds me of a joke that I read a few years ago Just Googled some of the key words and found it on the Net

In the Alpha Course videos Nicky Gumbel tells a story about a Cockney who couldn't decide between Ether, who was a gorgeous blonde, and Maria, who was an equally gorgeous brunette. The indecision worried him so much that he decided he had better go to a church and pray. "God, do you want me to ave Ether, or do you want me to ave Maria?" When he opened his eyes there on the wall he saw "Ave Maria."

Coincidences are so easily turned into what we think are signs, but the only way to be truly sure of something is to wait - God may not answer your prayer immediately, but be assured that you will find out whether she is the girl in God's timing. Let the relationship grow in godliness and you will find out, I assure you.

 

[micaela]

Reminds me of a joke that I read a few years ago Just Googled some of the key words and found it on the Net



Coincidences are so easily turned into what we think are signs, but the only way to be truly sure of something is to wait - God may not answer your prayer immediately, but be assured that you will find out whether she is the girl in God's timing. Let the relationship grow in godliness and you will find out, I assure you.

LOL. Great post KristianJ - I really respect your advice and consistent reminders to seek God first.

 

[mlukas]

ok so my girlfriend (candice) and i have been going out for about 4 months now and I really love her. we just said i love you a couple of weeks ago. anyway, my aunt and i were sitting out on a dock fishing and i was praying to God asking Him if Candice is the girl i'm supposed to marry one day. i asked Him to send me a sign letting me know. So about 15 minutes later I wasn't thinkin about my prayer anymore and I look down on the ground where a newspaper article and some other papers are laying. every word on the article is covered up by other papers except for the word "Candice." I pointed it out to my aunt and she said "hey, maybe it's a sign from god." I hadn't even told my aunt about the prayer. do you think this was a sign? something to take seriously?

signs or no signs, there's not a whole lot you could know about anyone in the course of 4 months. Take your time, and proceed with your eyes wide open. Don't let one "sign" blind you to what might be obvious problems or issues in the relationship later on down the line

 

[invisiblebabe]

signs or no signs, there's not a whole lot you could know about anyone in the course of 4 months.

I've known couples who got engaged after three weeks, and are still happily married. Ever heard of singer Michael W. Smith? He and his wife are one of 'em.

I also knew with certainty that my fiance was the one I wanted to marry, after almost two months of knowing him. I was pretty sure before then, too.

 

[plum]

And that is a rare blessing Possible, yes, but then again some people marry successfully after having NEVER met each other (some arranged marriages) God is good and knows His children perfectly. Kevin, God loves you so much. He will continue to give you help in making decisions and wise choices down the line. Remember, even if that sign is true and was sent by God just for you... our personal choices can actually lead us away from what the idea could be. For instance, being so sure it's the right one might make you too certain and perhaps you two could make a bad sexual decision down the road that could hurt you both and break you apart. Or through other developments in your life, you could change so much that you're not a match anymore. I'm just speaking hypothetically, but simply in love.
Trust God, but make the right choices. Seek wisdom.

 

[sOuLifieD]

Man, seriously, ask God. I can't tell you if God was trying to show you something or not... but in my personal life, God has spoken through 'signs'?, but not JUST through signs. We've got to break our dependency on seeing things before believing them, you know? Ask the Lord and He'll answer you. Maybe it won't be the answer you want, but He will answer you.
I want my relationship with the Lord to be one where I can ask Him anything and He'll answer me honestly. Not one where I rely on God to show Himself through signs. He can just tell me, and He'll bring confirmation if I ask for it.

 

[invisiblebabe]

I want my relationship with the Lord to be one where I can ask Him anything and He'll answer me honestly. Not one where I rely on God to show Himself through signs. He can just tell me, and He'll bring confirmation if I ask for it.

God certainly will answer you honestly about anything..... but the problem lies in the fact that our own whims and desires (which we may not even be consciously aware of, depending on the situation) sometimes cloud what God is saying to us, even to the point of us thinking He is telling us the exact opposite of what He really is saying.

Great ideal... but in actuality, is it really that easy?

 

[Iceman_Aragorn]

Then, I met my now ex-fiance.... and there must've been lots of signs there.... after all, the first time we met, we said the same thing at the same time about 13 times in one weekend... and the church sermon that weekend was all about relationships and how God puts people in our lives. Since we didn't end up together, obviously those "signs" weren't indicating we were going to marry.

Not necessarily.

I'm not saying a believe in 'signs' per se, but I did want to point out that God often puts people into relationships, not so that they will get married, but so that they end of learning something invaluable (ie patience, forgiveness, a million other things) which is necessary for the relationship with the person he REALLY wants you to marry to work.

So basically, I'm just pointing out that signs (if you believe in them in the first place) that lead to a 'failed' relationship may still have been God's will for you. I know in the more serious of my past relationships, if I hadn't learned what I did as a result, I would probably not even truly be a Christian today.

 

[mlukas]

I've known couples who got engaged after three weeks, and are still happily married. Ever heard of singer Michael W. Smith? He and his wife are one of 'em.

I also knew with certainty that my fiance was the one I wanted to marry, after almost two months of knowing him. I was pretty sure before then, too.

I don't deny that this can happen BUT God not only expects us to pay attention to "signs" but ALSO to use our MINDS ind determining things! I have a friend who was engaged after 2 months to his girlfriend, you know what, they are now divorced and seems like they were a bad match from the begining. But, again, he thought all the "signs" were there. Just because ONE "sign" occurs you can't base a relationship on that. It's got to be based on things more stable and long lasting...

 

[invisiblebabe]

Not necessarily.

I'm not saying a believe in 'signs' per se, but I did want to point out that God often puts people into relationships, not so that they will get married, but so that they end of learning something invaluable (ie patience, forgiveness, a million other things) which is necessary for the relationship with the person he REALLY wants you to marry to work.

So basically, I'm just pointing out that signs (if you believe in them in the first place) that lead to a 'failed' relationship may still have been God's will for you. I know in the more serious of my past relationships, if I hadn't learned what I did as a result, I would probably not even truly be a Christian today.

Oh, certainly they might've been real signs. I didn't deny that. I was getting at the fact that all signs do not mean "oooh here is THE ONE!!!" (and I don't believe in "the one" either... but that is a subject for another thread )

blessings
kayli

 

[invisiblebabe]

I don't deny that this can happen BUT God not only expects us to pay attention to "signs" but ALSO to use our MINDS ind determining things! I have a friend who was engaged after 2 months to his girlfriend, you know what, they are now divorced and seems like they were a bad match from the begining. But, again, he thought all the "signs" were there. Just because ONE "sign" occurs you can't base a relationship on that. It's got to be based on things more stable and long lasting...

Hmm... either you misinterpreted what I was trying to say, or I didn't clarify my statement enough.

My fiance and I had no "signs" as in, dreams, random writing on the wall, etc. I hope the "signs" you were talking about refer to things like personality compatibility, families getting along, both people are ready and able to be in a serious relationship (ie, their schedules allow it), both of them agree on basic theology and what they want in a future family...... etc etc. NOT things like "God, send me a sign if he is the one You have for me!" and then someone randomly comes along and mentions the guy's name.

Certainly there will always be stories with positive and negative outcomes, no matter how soon the couple decided they wanted to marry. My point was more that one cannot set a timetable in regards to relationship. My personality is naturally inclined to get relationships very deep very quickly. So, it makes sense that my fiance and I knew right away. However, I would not say our way works for everyone. Knowing yourself and analyzing yourself is key.

Blessings
kayli