Dissapointed with the gender?

[hisbloodformysins]

This isn't a thread for people to wag fingers of shame at eachother, including at myself....

But I guess I was just interested in starting a conversation on whether or not you were at all dissapointed when you found out the gender of your baby?

I have to admit, we were hoping for a boy. We already have a boy & girl. And when we found out it's going to be a girl, we both felt really dissapointed. I don't know how dissapointed my husband stilll feels, I'm over it for the most part. Girls are really sweet, our little girl is really sweet. I do experiance the feeling of dissapointment come back now & then, but I say to myself... God wanted us to have this little girl. And I am happy.

Has anyone else experianced something similar?

Also, are you planning on stopping with this one, or is there going to be more?

Although I had felt for the longest time I wanted 4, hubby put his foot down with this one (the third) and said he wanted to stop, and experiancing the stress I have been with the two I already had, I agreed. But now both of us are reconsidering stopping. This is interesting, because before we got pregnant with this one, we believe God spoke to both of our hearts about having another little boy at the same time..... and this is a girl... so it does make me wonder if I'm meant to have a fourth. But, even if we do, and even if it is another girl, that doesn't matter. We'll be happy with what God gives us.

Thanks for participating.

HB

 

[CarrieAg93]

I have 3 boys. I really thought I would be disappointed if my 3rd wasn't a girl since I knew it was be our last. I can't remember being disappointed when we first found out, but I could have been. If I was it didn't last long because I know when he was born there were no feelings of disappointed.

 

[jgonz]

I had a girl, boy, girl (who died), girl, boy, boy, boy, boy... and I have to admit, those last 2 boys I was REALLY wanting a girl. I was very disappointed when the u/s Clearly showed boys both times. But, I got used to the idea and was fine by the time they were each born.

My last baby Was a girl... and I was so excited! Now that she's 4.5 yrs old, I'm realizing how much Easier my boys were.... much less emotional drama on a daily basis for sure.

Oh well. Grass is always greener, no?

 

[purpleunicorn_Andi]

yes I was disappointed at first... with this one with Robert it really didn't matter either way, but I was convinced with this one that he was a girl up until that last US... nope boy part there not a girl at all... but I have gotten use to the idea...

I want to try one more time for a girl in a few years... hubby said I'd have to find someone else to try with.... but who knows how things will be in a few years he may change his mind

 

[JustBeachy]

When we found that we were expecting a girl rather than a boy for a first child, my husband was SO disappointed and he remained disappointed until our little girl was born. He told me later that as soon as he saw her, he couldn't remember why it even mattered that he had wanted a boy.
We hope to have another one or two...eventually...

 

[ChildByGrace]

Well we don't know what we are having but i know that if it ends up being a boy i will be disappointed. I have 4 nephews and 2 nieces and the 4 boys are just a nightmare that it's put me right off having a boy at all.
I know though that once i get over the shock i'll be ok with it.

When it comes to having a second - if i already have a boy and it ends up being another boy then i will be upset becuase we are just having 2 and i really want a boy.

If this first one is a girl then i'll want the 2nd to be a boy for my H's sake - although i'll still want a girl!

 

[Beth1231]

Hmm....well, this is my first and baby's gender is a surprise. I have always wanted a boy first (since I was even remotely interested in having children), but right before my pregnancy began, I received some healing from my fears about repeating the mother/daughter relationship that I endured as a teen. Then I got pregnant and around week 6 I put my hand to my non-existant tummy and said "Oh, I think it's a girl." And that feeling has stuck around ever since. My husband told me last Sunday that he also thinks it's a girl.
SO...if baby is a boy, I won't be disappointed (I don't think), I will merely be surprised that my intuition could be so wrong. And I'll probabaly be a bit relieved since there is already a girl grandbaby on my husband's side and my BIL's girl friend is having a baby three months after mine! I don't want her to have the first girl AND the first boy...that seems really unfair since she isn't even married. That was long, but that's our story

 

[Green Orchid]

I'm glad we decided that we're going to have a surprise because I know that when that baby will be in my arms, I won't be disappointed either way. However, I kind of really hope it's a boy because it would make my adoption projects easier with me wanting to adopt at least one chinese girl.

 

[Thankful4HIM]

We thought we were having a boy because my pregnancy has been terrible, somewhat like it was with my first son. My daughter just lots of heartburn. So, we had already told ourselves a boy. U/s said girl, and it was shock for me, disappointment for hubby because this is our last. But as soon as we walked outside, he said it'd be good for Carlei, 2 sisters will have a strong bond (hopefully) lol

 

[Redstiletto]

Hubby will be disappointed if this one is a girl. He really has his heart set on a boy. This is our first human baby.

But we have already have a boy (dog) who is 11, a girl (cat) who is about 9, another girl (cat) who is 3 and another girl (dog) who is 2.5.

He says our family is over run by girls, and he needs more sanity which he thinks a boy will bring!

 

[RoseofLima]

I was bummed when I found out it was a boy--but I really thought it was a boy- so I think that made it easier. Also- because of his name- it was easier on my extended family for it to be a boy...his name means A LOT to my in laws.

Now that he is here- I am so madly in love with him- I couldn't imagine him being a girl!

I hope this is not our last. While I was pregnant- I really wanted this to be our last, but holding him, and snuggling in bed with him (even with the few rough days we've had)....I can't imagine never getting to do this again. My husband doesn't really care either way. We'll try to avoid pregnancy for awhile...and then we'll see...

 

[Linnis]

I wanted a girl. All my husband's family has boys including his brother. Well at 19 weeks, we found out I was having a boy. I wasn't shocked, I mostly knew I was going to have a boy but I hoped for a girl.

Now that I have my son I couldn't see having a girl. He's the most perfect thing God ever made and he's all mine. I'm so in love.

 

[RooMama]

When my first son was born, I felt about a half a second of disappointment that he was a boy. With my second, I really wanted a girl and really struggled with the idea of having another boy, but after going into labor 6 1/2 weeks early, sitting in the hospital for 3 days on bedrest and then having an emergency c-section for fetal distress, as I was laying on the operating table, I really didn't care what the gender was, I just wanted to hear the baby cry.
With this one we found out the sex (it's a girl) ahead of time, because I wanted to get any disappointment over with before the birth, so I can just feel happiness the first time I hold my new baby.

 

[Kazamataz]

Well i dont know what I'm having as the little bugger crossed it's legs in the ultrasound!!!

I really want a little boy and from when i first found out i was pregnant i had this really strong feeling it was a little boy.

So i am a little worried that if we have a little girl i will be disappointed. I know that God would have given us a little girl for a reason and the very fact im having a baby is a blessing but i do worry that i'm not going to be happy if it's a girl.

however it's not something im dwelling on, i guess i'll deal with it when bub comes (IN 8 WEEKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

we would like to have 4 children in total.
My husband and I both feel 2 kids is not enough and
we both grew up in families of 3 children (we are both middle children) so we would never have 3 as we both feel it's the worst thing you could do for the middle child they have it so hard.
So 4 it is for us.

 

[Singin4Him]

From the moment I was pregnant I got a boy vibe and we were really only focusing on boy names. When it got closer to my u/s date I started hoping it was going to be a girl. I was disappointed for about 5 minutes after I found out for sure it was a boy and then I got over it .

I couldn't imagine it any othr way now, he is just the most precious little thing God has given us! I am just so in love with him! I love snuggling with my little boy! He's my little cuddlebug.

 

[Savedthroughfaith]

I wanted another girl so badly - I knew this one would be my last and I wanted my daughter to have a sister. But I "knew" somehow that he was a boy. And I saw that winkie on the ultrasound before the doctor even said a word. And I will admit, I was disappointed. But I got over it quickly when we had some complications during my pregnancy. I didn't care boy or girl, I just wanted my baby to be okay. Which he is, and I absolutely LOVE my little guy!

 

[RedTulipMom]

Well we don't know what we are having but i know that if it ends up being a boy i will be disappointed. I have 4 nephews and 2 nieces and the 4 boys are just a nightmare that it's put me right off having a boy at all.
I know though that once i get over the shock i'll be ok with it.

When it comes to having a second - if i already have a boy and it ends up being another boy then i will be upset becuase we are just having 2 and i really want a boy.

If this first one is a girl then i'll want the 2nd to be a boy for my H's sake - although i'll still want a girl!

can i just suggest something..take it or leave it.
Why dont you find out if its a boy or girl at the ultrasound if you KNOW you will be disappointed if it IS a boy? The reason i say this is..do you REALLY want to sit there in disappointment after the birth and delivery of your child??? It would be better to have disappointment at the 20 wk ultrasound..and then have time to get over the disappointment and be HAPPY the day your child is born! i say this from experience. With my son Luke..he was my 2nd son and i was really wanting a girl. I found out at my ultrasound he was a boy and YES i was disappointed..i even briefly cried. I was dissapointed for a good week or more and then i adjusted and then eventually i was happy! By the time he was born i was able to be 100% when he came into this world without even a tinge of disappointment. After going through that i KNEW that i had done the best thing by finding out early. It would have been awful going through labor and delivery and then being DISAPPOINTED at what sex my baby was and being bummed out for a week or two after the birth when it is supposed to be a happy joyous time. Really seriously think about finding out at the ultrasound. You cant control the feeling of disappointment..but you CAN control WHEN you feel it..thanks to technology! woot!

 

[purpleunicorn_Andi]

can i just suggest something..take it or leave it.
Why dont you find out if its a boy or girl at the ultrasound if you KNOW you will be disappointed if it IS a boy? The reason i say this is..do you REALLY want to sit there in disappointment after the birth and delivery of your child??? It would be better to have disappointment at the 20 wk ultrasound..and then have time to get over the disappointment and be HAPPY the day your child is born! i say this from experience. With my son Luke..he was my 2nd son and i was really wanting a girl. I found out at my ultrasound he was a boy and YES i was disappointed..i even briefly cried. I was dissapointed for a good week or more and then i adjusted and then eventually i was happy! By the time he was born i was able to be 100% when he came into this world without even a tinge of disappointment. After going through that i KNEW that i had done the best thing by finding out early. It would have been awful going through labor and delivery and then being DISAPPOINTED at what sex my baby was and being bummed out for a week or two after the birth when it is supposed to be a happy joyous time. Really seriously think about finding out at the ultrasound. You cant control the feeling of disappointment..but you CAN control WHEN you feel it..thanks to technology! woot!

I agree... if you know you are going to be that disappointed then find out now, so you have the time to accept and bond... and not all boys are little monsters all the time
just part of the time. I am glad I found out with this one, because I was really disappointed, I really wanted a girl and was convinced I was having a girl up untill the 20 week US... but the idea of another boy has started to grow on me, and as much as I want a girl I know that this time arround God has different plans for us...(unless something has changed drastically in the last 12 weeks... I may be getting another US next week, so I'll get another look to see for sure that Thomas is a Thomas and not an Elizabeth

 

[ChildByGrace]

can i just suggest something..take it or leave it.
Why dont you find out if its a boy or girl at the ultrasound if you KNOW you will be disappointed if it IS a boy? The reason i say this is..do you REALLY want to sit there in disappointment after the birth and delivery of your child??? It would be better to have disappointment at the 20 wk ultrasound..and then have time to get over the disappointment and be HAPPY the day your child is born! i say this from experience. With my son Luke..he was my 2nd son and i was really wanting a girl. I found out at my ultrasound he was a boy and YES i was disappointed..i even briefly cried. I was dissapointed for a good week or more and then i adjusted and then eventually i was happy! By the time he was born i was able to be 100% when he came into this world without even a tinge of disappointment. After going through that i KNEW that i had done the best thing by finding out early. It would have been awful going through labor and delivery and then being DISAPPOINTED at what sex my baby was and being bummed out for a week or two after the birth when it is supposed to be a happy joyous time. Really seriously think about finding out at the ultrasound. You cant control the feeling of disappointment..but you CAN control WHEN you feel it..thanks to technology! woot!

Thank you

I've been meaning to come in and alter my post as i kept thinking that i really sounded like there was no way i wanted a boy lol

I know that when it comes to it i will be happy with whatever i have. I believe God knows what He is doing when he gives you certian sexes of children. One of my SIL's would not to able to cope with girls and she admits that herself.

It's not as big a deal as my post sounded. I don't sit and think about it at the time or anything. And i really don't think that if they say it's a boy i'll be disappointed for more than a few seconds.

 

[PegasusOnFire]

Totally and utterly disappointed with both my girls, but God is giving me what I need and not what I want. I can't see life without my daughter Christian and now she is getting a little sister. BTW I have another ultrasound in 4 weeks and that will again show she is a girl.