Did God create a specific Woman/Man for us?

[nick garai]

According to Judaism there is a partner set aside for each of us from the moment of conception. We just have to get hooked up. The angels will do the work getting us together.

 

[Ubuntu]

I think that God definitely has a plan for each and every one of us, so yes, I tend to believe that there's someone “special” out there for me. (If the good Lord wants me married at all, that is...) But of course we also have a free will and God doesn't force us to marry anyone against our will, it's not as if he plans to hook us up with someone we absolutely don't like, that's not the way it works.

I wouldn't say that God has “created” someone with myself in mind, that's not a precise way to phrase it. I'd rather say that God knows the hearts of everyone and he knows which persons that match each other well and which don't. He has a perfect knowledge of our hearts, our past, present and our future. That's why finding a spouse shouldn't be something we attempt to do detached from the guidance of God. God is the ultimate match-maker, and there are stories in Bible where God is portrayed as being the driving force behind the marriage of two persons. (The story of Isaac and Rebecca comes to my mind.)

“House and riches are an inheritance from fathers,
but a prudent wife is from the Lord.” - Proverbs 19:14

 

[markvs]

For many years I was hung up on this one, as this is what we were taught, there is 1 only and if you miss it then you are missing His will for you and the result might as well be a failure. I had a vision once of a woman who, at the time was presumed to be the one. Thirty years later I have still not met her. I was married to another lady for 20years until that also failed. So, you can see here the perfect or failure mantra. Recently I have been taught that it is more like being in a playground. As long as we do not escape from the playground, ie. go outside God's rules and laws, then anything is fair game. This is incredibly freeing as now I don't have to tie myself up in insecurity and paranoia trying to figure out if this is THE right one but, simply put it in His hands and ask blessing on it. This applies to all areas of life not just matrimony.

 

[Ceta_cea]

I'm not sure if there is only one but I do believe that the Lord made each of us with specific characteristics and that some fit better than other. I think the Lord aims to put people together who will make each other better.

For example I am rather inpatient so it would be better for me if my future husband as a lot of patience. I could learn to be more patient through him.

The Lord has made us and knows us so much better than we know our self, therefore I would not be surprised if he has a man in mind for me who balanced out my weakness.

 

[markvs]

Ceta_cea, experience tells me that a more impatient man would be better, in that he would tend to reflect your own actions in impatience, whereas a patient man would probably be simply quiet about your inappropriate behaviour. This is my opinion as that is how it played out in my own, failed marriage. To the point where, after she left she indicated that she was unhappy that I never stood up to her, yet, after separation, she was unhappy that I did. I guess you cannot win.

 

[redblue22]

Hosea and what's-her-name come to mind.

And Job and his SO.

 

[Messy]

(The story of Isaac and Rebecca comes to my mind.)

She made her kid betray his dad.

 

[redblue22]

I always heard Moses had a bad marriage. I wonder where that came from.

 

[Messy]

.

 

[Messy]

I always heard Moses had a bad marriage. I wonder where that came from.

He hung around too much with his sheep, he could only say beh.

 

[redblue22]

I think that believing "God has someone for me" would be a really hard belief to live with. Does God have everything she says and does ALSO in the plan for me? I would have some serious questions for God. And once I figure I picked the wrong one and he had someone else in mind, then I would just be a divorce ticking bomb.

 

[Ubuntu]

She made her kid betray his dad.

Yes, and because of this sin she never saw her son again. She was dead when Jacob returned from Mesopotamia.

Even godly people will make errors.

 

[Ubuntu]

I think that believing "God has someone for me" would be a really hard belief to live with. Does God have everything she says and does ALSO in the plan for me? I would have some serious questions for God. And once I figure I picked the wrong one and he had someone else in mind, then I would just be a divorce ticking bomb.

Nah, once you are married to someone that person is the "one" for you. Some people surely make bad mistakes when they decide to get married, but Jesus is quite clear that we cannot get married and get divorced on a whim.

Love isn't only having a romantic attraction towards someone, love is also about devotion, hard work, and about life long loyalty. The fact that God often has a special person in mind for us doesn't mean that the marriage union will be without difficulties, that you won't have to make sacrifices to make the marriage work.

 

[Messy]

Love isn't only having a romantic attraction towards someone, love is also about devotion, hard work, and about life long loyalty. The fact that God often has a special person in mind for us doesn't mean that the marriage union will be without difficulties, that you won't have to make sacrifices to make the marriage work.

Yes, that's what I mean. I really waited for 'the one', I even got a prophecy from someone who didn't know us to confirm it and lol it was just so that the kids would be born and your character formed or something. Glad I have kids, I Always thought 'the one' meant something more romantic or an assurance, oh well, must have mixed the Doris Day movies with the Bible.

 

[Messy]

Sorry, I feel like grumpy cat. They'd better let married people post here, they're more positive. I found one positive example though of a bunch of bad marriages with at least 5 Mr. Wrongs:
the woman at the well, revival broke out in the city!!