“Diabolus Absconditus”: the conjunction of intellect and psychotropic-altered senses supported by insistent and archaic sounds.
Cognitive activity:
God comes to be known in ways that originate in God solely. God is nothing if He is not, in every sense, the surpassing God; In the sense of common everyday being, in the sense of dread, Horror and impurity, and, finally, in the sense of nothing...
He is mystery, indeed he is the absolute mystery. Divine disclosure is in direct proportion to the degree of divine concealment. Intensification of revelation equals to increase of god’s hiddenness. Descent of the Deus Absconditus (the hidden God):
The unreservedly open spirit – open to death, to torment, to joy -, The open spirit, open and dying, Suffering and dying and happy, stands in a certain veiled light: That light is divine. And the cry that breaks from a twisted mouth may perhaps twist him who utters it, But what he speaks is an immense alleluia, flung into endless silence, and lost there.
Shall my only victory be available in conscience? Why is absence the proof, when I demand palpable presence? There is enough light to enlighten the elect and enough darkness to humble them. There is enough darkness to blind the reprobate and enough clarity to condemn them, and make them without excuse.
Our perception is subject to the fissure of concupiscence. Woe struck am I realizing that the light cast on this Chiaroscuro (the distribution of light and shade in a picture) world is partial and selective. Division, election and predestination--Enabled by grace or left to one’s own device...
Anguish only is sovereign absolute. The sovereign is a king no more: it dwells low-biding in big cities. It knits itself up in silence, obscuring it’s sorrow. Crouching thick-wrapped, there it waits, Lies waiting for the advent of Him who shall strike a general terror; But meanwhile and even so sorrow scornfully mocks at all that comes to pass, at all there is.
From very high above a kind of stillness swept down upon me and froze me. It was as though I were borne aloft in a flight of headless and un-bodied angels. Shaped from the broad swooping of wings, but it was simpler than that. I became unhappy and felt painfully forsaken, as one is when in the presence of God.
That, viewed through the optic of “philosophy”, makes no sense at all. I don’t mind having my sorrow derided if derided it has to be, He only will grasp me aright whose heart holds a wound that is an incurable wound, Who never, for anything, in any way, would be cured of it...And what man, if so wounded, would ever be willing to “die” of any other hurt?
If there is nothing that surpasses our powers and our understanding, If we do not acknowledge something greater than ourselves, Greater than we are despite ourselves, Something which at all costs must not be, then we do not reach the insensate moment towards which we strive. With all that is in our power and which at the same time We exert with all our power to stave off.
I can utter no word, O my God, unless I be permitted by Thee; And can move in no direction until I obtain Thy sanction. It is Thou, O my God, Who hast called me into being through the power of Thy might, and has endued me with Thy grace to manifest Thy Cause.
The act whereby being – existence – is bestowed upon us…Is an unbearable surpassing of being, an act no less unbearable than that of dying. And since, in death, being is taken away from us at the same time it is given us, We must seek for it in the feeling of dying, In those unbearable moments when it seems to us that we are dying Because the existence in us, during these interludes, Exists through nothing but a sustaining and ruinous excess, When the fullness of horror and that of joy coincide.
As I waited for annihilation, all which subsisted in me seemed to me to be the dross over which man’s life tarries...
The more we suffer the more we become; as long as you realize that the suffering is the becoming. Man creates the image of God that brings Him to man’s senses. What man fails to see in the reflection of the world is that it is God bringing us to His senses.
*Deus Absconditus*
