developing relationships

[janny108]

Hi,
We've been going to PCA church for almost5 months now and although everyone is friendly, I don't feel like I have "friends" here. It seems to be about who can organize what. In churches in the past, I had friends who did not necessarily come from my background or were like me. For one thing everyone seems well off financially and we are not. I know that is not supposed to matter, but it does a little. I can't play hostess for some things like other people do since I live in an apt.(we will move in Aug).

How do you all feel about your church' s friendliness and having "friends"?

Years past, church was a big part of my life, I loved going, had friends there, was involved in different things, but mostly sunday school and choir.

thanks
Jan

 

[JJB]

Jan,

Making friends takes a long time. We moved to a new city about seven years ago and I think it took about three years before I no longer felt I was lost and had friends.

I have been hesitant to open my house until I saw the wide range of ppl in our new congregation. It ranges from financially blessed to financially struggling. That is what I love about our congregation. We are all brothers in the Lord, no matter what our education and financial level.

In our former city and our former church (PCUSA), I had very similar feelings to you. There were many with more education and financial resources than us. We made ourselves open up our house and after we did it once, it was no big deal. It was a hurdle for us, not for others. Do what you can because that is all you can do! No need to apologize or feel less. You are still blessed and used by God for his glory.

 

[janny108]

Jan,

Making friends takes a long time. We moved to a new city about seven years ago and I think it took about three years before I no longer felt I was lost and had friends.

I have been hesitant to open my house until I saw the wide range of ppl in our new congregation. It ranges from financially blessed to financially struggling. That is what I love about our congregation. We are all brothers in the Lord, no matter what our education and financial level.

In our former city and our former church (PCUSA), I had very similar feelings to you. There were many with more education and financial resources than us. We made ourselves open up our house and after we did it once, it was no big deal. It was a hurdle for us, not for others. Do what you can because that is all you can do! No need to apologize or feel less. You are still blessed and used by God for his glory.

Glad to hear we are not the only ones waiting to feel like we fit in.
You said you opened your house up for others? What kinds of things did you do? Our apt is small which is one reason I'm really wanting to move! I could do more if I had a place of our own.

Jan

 

[JJB]

Glad to hear we are not the only ones waiting to feel like we fit in.
You said you opened your house up for others? What kinds of things did you do? Our apt is small which is one reason I'm really wanting to move! I could do more if I had a place of our own.

Jan

Because our daugher is still school age we opened our house to her friends and their mothers. The girls played and the moms had coffee/tea.

Once we were in a bible study, everyone took turns at having it at their home. We just took our turn.

Lastly, I smiled a lot while at church. Sometimes we would take the first step and invite others to go to lunch after church.