Detachment Parenting?

[surrealist247]

Crazy Cat Woman you sound like one. I don't need to try good parenting and therapy. I already am a good parent. Also, I am very blessed. I don't have to let my daughter cry it out at night because she has been sleeping through the night since she was 3-4 weeks old. I let her cry it out during the day when she is fussy. Also, this is unrelated to my post about attachment because, as I said, my husband and I agree on this and we both do the exact same thing. You know how to criticize, but can you read?

I do think the term detachment throws some people off, but it is used in opposition to the term "attachment parenting," which, by the way, is not the Holy Grail of good parenting. It is also somewhat used as a joke.

"At the heart, not the hip." I like that LesleyAnn!

InfinityandBeyond thank you. We use Similac. I do think it is a cultural thing, but I'm just not liking this culture. Honestly, I think the end result will be a rather weak generation.

 

[InfinityandBeyond]

InfinityandBeyond thank you. We use Similac. I do think it is a cultural thing, but I'm just not liking this culture. Honestly, I think the end result will be a rather weak generation.

What you're doing is more of the cultural norm actually (at least of what we generally see in America). But lately people have been going back to co-sleeping, baby wearing, and other trends like feeding all organic.

Parenting styles change with the times. What you're doing is not uncommon at all.

Sililac is a good one.

 

[surrealist247]

I hope so but I can't seem to find anybody else doing it this way! Sigh... thanks.

 

[InfinityandBeyond]

I have relatives doing it that way, you're not alone.

 

[heart of peace]

When I saw the thread title, I thought it had to do with Reactive Attachment Disorder. Detachment parenting was born out of a backlash to attachment style parenting, is that right? You said that you are attached to your child; if you are a detached parent, wouldn't the goal be to have a detached child? I am somewhat confused by the terminology.

 

[Inkachu]

I agree, the term "detachment parenting" should just not be used at all, it is way too misleading. Perhaps "non-attachment parenting"?

Anyway, I never "baby wore", I just carried my child, isn't that why God gave me two arms? I was a master at having him in one arm and doing things with the other. I pumped briefly, but I had major breastfeeding difficulties, so I went to formula within the first few weeks out of necessity. And I never, ever slept with my baby in the bed with me, but his crib was in my bedroom.

I have no problem with people who enjoy having their child velcroed to them 24/7. I think it's great. And if someone wants to actually put their child down and do something else, like use the bathroom in privacy, that's fine, too!

 

[Avniel]

Crazy Cat Woman you sound like one. I don't need to try good parenting and therapy. I already am a good parent. Also, I am very blessed. I don't have to let my daughter cry it out at night because she has been sleeping through the night since she was 3-4 weeks old. I let her cry it out during the day when she is fussy. Also, this is unrelated to my post about attachment because, as I said, my husband and I agree on this and we both do the exact same thing. You know how to criticize, but can you read?

I do think the term detachment throws some people off, but it is used in opposition to the term "attachment parenting," which, by the way, is not the Holy Grail of good parenting. It is also somewhat used as a joke.

"At the heart, not the hip." I like that LesleyAnn!

InfinityandBeyond thank you. We use Similac. I do think it is a cultural thing, but I'm just not liking this culture. Honestly, I think the end result will be a rather weak generation.

I don't think the confusion is because of the term detachment I think it's because what you described comes off cold and uncaring. I have a 4month old that does self soothes. However when she cries and needs me I'm the first there. Sometimes she puts herself to sleep sometimes she falls asleep on me. My wife breast feed because it's really the best option for your child to build up an immune system and there is also room for man's error God made the breast milk it's always going to be better.

I don't believe it's cultural I'm Jamaican and I've traveled as well the one thing I will say is most other cultures breast feed and co-sleep. Even in third world countries from East Africa all the way to north bronx I've never heard someone celebrated using that particular method. I have heard they aren't nurturing, they have a mean streak, uncaring....that's really what it comes off as.

 

[Avniel]

I agree, the term "detachment parenting" should just not be used at all, it is way too misleading. Perhaps "non-attachment parenting"?

Anyway, I never "baby wore", I just carried my child, isn't that why God gave me two arms? I was a master at having him in one arm and doing things with the other. I pumped briefly, but I had major breastfeeding difficulties, so I went to formula within the first few weeks out of necessity. And I never, ever slept with my baby in the bed with me, but his crib was in my bedroom.

I have no problem with people who enjoy having their child velcroed to them 24/7. I think it's great. And if someone wants to actually put their child down and do something else, like use the bathroom in privacy, that's fine, too!

I put my baby down all the time but my wife breast and we co-slept.

 

[Sabertooth]

We subscribed to some of those things, but not all. Generally, we were very hands-on with our children, but would certainly let them "cry it out" once confirming that they were healthy and safe. I don't think it is an either/or proposition.

 

[Inkachu]

As I recall, the only time I ever let my baby "cry it out" was when he was down for a nap and was crying from exhaustion and frustration, and inevitably, he would find a point of surrender and literally just fall over asleep in his crib lol. He still fights sleep and still falls out within seconds once he stops battling it; he's 13 now I find him slumped over on the couch all the time lol.