depression...

[superadria2686]

I think lately I have really bad depression..Its really bothering me because I dont feel that I belong anywhere in the world. I just moved back from Texas (living with my sister was very hard and almost unbearable) and now where I live with my mom isn't any better, my grandpa is always making decisions for me and telling me what to do, I am 19 years old and I think it is time for me to make my own decisions and do what I feel is right. My grandma is really losing her mind a lot because she says things that dont make any sense and she is always yelling at me for something, telling me I need to clean and I need to do stuff because I live there and I should help because I am not staying there for free..I do help her out around the house and clean a lot..I also have things I want to do and need to do like study, but sometimes she gets mad if I lock myself in my room and study for a few hours, she is always yelling at me to do something. Then there is my mom, she is always cranky when she gets home from work and if I ask her anything, like what are you eating for supper, she blows up at me. I dont understand her at all, she tells me she loves me and wants me to stay with her but I cant live like this..I dont know if I am being spoiled or what.I guess I just needed to vent since most of my friends dont really listen to me anymore and my mom doesnt either.

 

[goldenviolet]

superadria God bless you!are you in school? that's a job. sounds like stress has shaken up the getting settled in. on top of that, everyone has their own issues. manage the best you can. do you go to church? i bet after you get settled everything seems less stressful. going to church may help you not feel so alone.

Dear father, please place your mercy and peace over this house. Father i pray that everyone displays appreciation and aids eachother in the things causing stress. in Jesus name, amen.

 

[Darrell2006]

I think lately I have really bad depression..Its really bothering me because I dont feel that I belong anywhere in the world. I just moved back from Texas (living with my sister was very hard and almost unbearable) and now where I live with my mom isn't any better, my grandpa is always making decisions for me and telling me what to do, I am 19 years old and I think it is time for me to make my own decisions and do what I feel is right. My grandma is really losing her mind a lot because she says things that dont make any sense and she is always yelling at me for something, telling me I need to clean and I need to do stuff because I live there and I should help because I am not staying there for free..I do help her out around the house and clean a lot..I also have things I want to do and need to do like study, but sometimes she gets mad if I lock myself in my room and study for a few hours, she is always yelling at me to do something. Then there is my mom, she is always cranky when she gets home from work and if I ask her anything, like what are you eating for supper, she blows up at me. I dont understand her at all, she tells me she loves me and wants me to stay with her but I
cant live like this..I dont know if I am being spoiled or what.I guess I just needed to vent since most of my friends dont really listen to me anymore and my mom doesnt either.

Hi superadria, I have similiar feeilings of not belonging, and feeling as though others aren't showing they care enough, I don't have any great advice, just keep reaching out and talking like your doing on this forum, and maybe talk with someone at your church or a christian couselor about your situation, and feelings of depression.
Also I noticed on another post that you quit smoking, are you still smoke free? I have been trying to quit and have cut down to a couple cigs a day, but have yet to kick it, but I'm going to keep praying for the strenght to quit.

Daryl

 

[superadria2686]

Also I noticed on another post that you quit smoking, are you still smoke free? I have been trying to quit and have cut down to a couple cigs a day, but have yet to kick it, but I'm going to keep praying for the strenght to quit.

Daryl

Yea, I am still smoke free, everytime I feel like smoking I tell someone, and I just dont go to any store where I will be tempted to buy cigs, and it also helps that I am not around ppl who smoke anymore!

 

[Teenuh]

I think lately I have really bad depression..Its really bothering me because I dont feel that I belong anywhere in the world. I just moved back from Texas (living with my sister was very hard and almost unbearable) and now where I live with my mom isn't any better, my grandpa is always making decisions for me and telling me what to do, I am 19 years old and I think it is time for me to make my own decisions and do what I feel is right. My grandma is really losing her mind a lot because she says things that dont make any sense and she is always yelling at me for something, telling me I need to clean and I need to do stuff because I live there and I should help because I am not staying there for free..I do help her out around the house and clean a lot..I also have things I want to do and need to do like study, but sometimes she gets mad if I lock myself in my room and study for a few hours, she is always yelling at me to do something. Then there is my mom, she is always cranky when she gets home from work and if I ask her anything, like what are you eating for supper, she blows up at me. I dont understand her at all, she tells me she loves me and wants me to stay with her but I cant live like this..I dont know if I am being spoiled or what.I guess I just needed to vent since most of my friends dont really listen to me anymore and my mom doesnt either.

Superadria2686,

I think you need so study at the library, it's best if you try to avoid them for a while. Meanwhile, if you don't have a job, you should go get one and keep saving until your able to get an apartment or something. I think your mother is PMsing, and she needs to stop. Hearing my mother everyday is unbearable. Ask god to give you patience. Sundays stop by and go to church if you don't. Good Luck.

 

[superadria2686]

WOW..life can really suck at times. I was starting to feel better and stuff and then all of a sudden I get this email from the girl that he was with. She told me that he had told her that she was prettier than I am and that he wanted to marry her and all that stuff. Yet he emails me saying he wants me back and that he is over her, well apparently they are still dating, according to her, and well I dont know what to think at all and I REALLY needed to talk so I jus posted this...I just feel so weird, like I have never felt this before, its like a NONfeeling feeling..I make NO sense but I still am trying to explain it..I feel like my life keeps getting worse and worse because my mom and my grandparents are all doing bad too..I dont know what I feel anymore, sometimes I just don't want to continue on living, but I know I want to because God will make things better..but sometimes i think WHEN IS IT MY TURN!??! anyway. thats really it..

 

[SimpleDevotion]

I'm sorry to hear that you are having trouble. Remember that you will always have friends here and we will always listen. I would suggest that you sort things out with the guy. Ask him about his relationship with the other girl, but try not to invest any emotion into the situation until you determine the nature of what is going on. Personally, the girl's email seems to suggest that he likes you, but it is best not to try to predict what the future holds.

Have you ever read the poem "To a Mouse" by Robert Burns? It's about a farmer who accidentally disturbs the home of a mouse. He is deeply regretful and at the end he says:

But Mousie, thou are no thy-lane,
In proving foresight may be vain:
The best laid schemes o' Mice an' Men,
Gang aft agley,
An' lea'e us nought but grief an' pain,
For promis'd joy!

​

Still, thou art blest, compar'd wi' me!
The present only toucheth thee:
But Och! I backward cast my e'e,
On prospects drear!
An' forward, tho' I canna see,
I guess an' fear!

The best laid schemes of Mice and Men are never guaranteed to succeed. We plan and hope but sometimes in vain. The mouse is better off though, he only has to worry about the present, but what do people often do? We worry about the past, which we cannot change and the future which we do not know, but still we guess, and we fear. You are in good company in dealing with the emotional impact of life, but you must have faith and let go of those thing that are in the past and the future that you cannot affect. Leave those things in the hands of God.

Be forever blessed.
​

 

[superadria2686]

I just want to say thank you for all the advice! Last night I talked to him and found out he has been saying the same things to 3 different people. So I am through with him, I threw away everything from/about him and I am not going to talk to him ever again. I feel so relieved that this is all over and I can be single now!! I know someday I will find someone who is perfect for me and apparently it isnt him and I AM GLAD!!!
<3