Decidedly Celibate Singles

[Photini]

I think I already posted once in this thread....but wanted to update. I am still 100% pursuing the celibate life. (It's been close to 3 years since I started following this path.) It is a way of life that here in the beginning has many tough temptations (God help me). But I realize that when I feel like I want to give it up, it is only because I've been fretting over silly things....in other words...because I have no faith.
When my children are grown, God-willing, I will enter a monastery.

 

[Rising_Suns]

I think I already posted once in this thread....but wanted to update. I am still 100% pursuing the celibate life. (It's been close to 3 years since I started following this path.) It is a way of life that here in the beginning has many tough temptations (God help me). But I realize that when I feel like I want to give it up, it is only because I've been fretting over silly things....in other words...because I have no faith.
When my children are grown, God-willing, I will enter a monastery.

that is wonderfull news heather.

One question; how will you know when your vocation as a mother will end, and your vocation as a sister will begin? Have you given this any thought yet?

 

[Photini]

One question; how will you know when your vocation as a mother will end, and your vocation as a sister will begin? Have you given this any thought yet?

I have spoken with my spiritual father about this, and he said that for now, we take it one day at a time. I trust that he will guide me along the safe path when and if the time comes.

 

[Rising_Suns]

I have spoken with my spiritual father about this, and he said that for now, we take it one day at a time. I trust that he will guide me along the safe path when and if the time comes.

my prayers are with you heather. May God guide you to fill your potential and be the most you can be for His kingdom.


Praying for humility,
-Davide

 

[Iosias]

I am celebate as long as I remain unmarried. God may have someone for me somewhere down the line. . .so I remain open to that. His will.

My sentiments exactly!

 

[Doc Dilly]

I know a lot of people who don't seem to feel it's a problem to run around and date while their children watch. I don't know. I made my first commit for life, but when that ended in divorce, I could never see myself being able to go after a new spouse and still give my sons the attention they need.

 

[Im_A]

I myself, am decidedly celibate, but i know it will not last forever, because I am open to God's plan. around 8 months ago, i just moved back to my home state from a relationship I shouldn't have been into in the first place, ended very badly. A lot of the time it was recovering from that, and the know how to start again in my search, but still dealing with the pain and everything from a bad breakup. i am also dealing with other issues in my life that this has heightened, and so now, I have not dated, or been on a date (what i consider a date) with a girl. At the moment, I have lost taste for the dating scene, (among the Christian dating scene and the non-Christian dating scene.) plus I am at a point in my life at basically getting everything back together. Emotions, financial situations, my struggles and my spiritual life. So at this point, I am not looking quo say, but I am open to God bringing me someone that may be going through similiar things and we can grow together that way. Become good friends, best friends, and then if we feel like it is something of worth for the both of us, take it to the next level, yet keeping it as pure as we can. so until then, yes i will remain decidedly celibate, grudgingly or ungrundgingly.


Joe

 

[Rising_Suns]

I myself, am decidedly celibate, but i know it will not last forever, because I am open to God's plan.

What if God's plan for you is to remain celibate for the rest of your life? Are you ready to embrace that call without a second thought?

 

[Rising_Suns]

Brethren in Christ,

There seems to be a little misunderstanding as to what "decidedly celibate" means. Some people are saying they will remain celibate until marriage, which is fine. I don't mean to sound harsh, but that is what a normal Christian should do anyway. But what is really meant by this thread is for people who are taking a vow of lifelong celibacy, for one reason or another. Since this is quite an extraordinary feat and a great calling, I would request that this thread be kept focussed on topic rather than those who are just doing what they are supposed to be doing and "waiting until marriage".

I am particularly curious about those non-Catholics out there who are discerning this calling to remain celibate. I take it you are all very familar with Paul's words in 1 Cor 7?

Peace be with you all,
-Davide

 

[Im_A]

What if God's plan for you is to remain celibate for the rest of your life? Are you ready to embrace that call without a second thought?

right now, i do not believe that God's Will is for me to remain celibate for the rest of my life. i do believe that God has someone specific set out for me. The reason why I believe this is because I have faith in this. Who knows, God is too big for me to predict anything, but I say this through faith. and if I am wrong, I will know later on in life, and will thus have to make changes in my thinking towards my hopes for marriage, a family, but at this point, I strongly believe in faith that God has someone set out special for me, and I will create a family with that person. so please forgive me if I got the term, "decidedly celibate" confused.

 

[CRitabe]

Since this is quite an extraordinary feat and a great calling

You made a comment about not wanting or meaning to sound harsh with your words; doesn't sound harsh so much as a little pompous. I don't think that we are to hold ourselves, our gifts or decisions up as exalted whether they are the gift or decision of celibacy or service.

I've read this entire thread and it seems to me that many folks are placing a lot of emphasis on the sexual aspect of relationships. Perhaps this was what St. Paul was relating to when he spoke about the fact that it was better to marry than to burn. To burn means to feel strong emotion or passion according to Webster. Somehow, it sounds as if there is a lot of "passion" about being celibate which is to still be focused on sexual expression whether you are taking a stand for that expression's acceptability or rejection.

From a historical standpoint, the Victorian age was a great proponent of the "taboo" of accepting one's sexuality and I'm sure that its origins are much deeper than that. It seems just as dangerous to me to suppress our natural state of creation which is that we are created sexual beings as it is to exagerate that part of who we are created to be. All of the earth is one giant expression of sexuality from plants cross polinating to the mother hen who seeks fertilization so that she can have new born chicks. I don't think that the plants worry a great deal about whether they are "good", "moral", or "set-apart" and frankly, I don't believe that God spends a lot of time up at night worrying about whether I am expressing my sexuality or not as long as I am fulfilling the one commandment that we were given by Christ; "to love my neighbor as myself and to love the Lord with all my heart, soul and mind." As long as I'm doing that, then, I believe that my heart is in the right place. If my heart is in the right place, my body will follow.

Can sexuality be misused, misconstrued, used for personal, political, social or economic gain, as a tool of manipulation, or as a facade for the refusal to assume responsibility for self. Of course it can. We see it every day, but then so can religion, social organizations, or almost anything that we can turn into an idol.

However, on the flip side of that coin, sexual expression between two committed people is a glorious gift, spiritual act, and an experience to be treasured and I'm quite sure that it has to be Godly - I know of no-one else who is capable of creating such a miracle.

 

[Rising_Suns]

You made a comment about not wanting or meaning to sound harsh with your words; doesn't sound harsh so much as a little pompous.

Peace be with you.

It is not my intention to sound pompus, and if you got that impression, I apologize. But the fact is, Paul did indeed recommend celibacy over married life, and it is a very difficult sacrifice to make, hence it is indeed a great feat.

I should say though, that in no way does this degrade the sacrament of holy matrimony. The Catholic Church traches that, subjectively, they are both equal callings; whatever God calls you to is the greater calling in your life. But objectively, celibacy is the greater calling and we should thus opt for it, just as Paul opted for it over marriage, if we are capable of doing so.

It seems just as dangerous to me to suppress our natural state of creation which is that we are created sexual beings as it is to exagerate that part of who we are created to be.

What is dangerous is this way of thinking because although we all have a sexual desire does not mean we should act on that desire. Paul didn't. And it's not like he suppressed it either. But rather, as one grows in Christ, they slowly become freed of their sexual bondages and perversion. If we gave into our sexual desires at every whim of our flesh, we would be no different than animals. But rather, we should see Christ as our example, and those that live the celibate life are like arrows pointing to the next life in heaven, since Scripture tells us that marriage does not exist in heaven.

Let me make clear though that both marriage and the celiabte life are profound reflections of God. Marriage in particular is a more tangible grace, and is a reflection of the marriage between Christ and the Church. But the consecrated life is even more direct of this reflection. A celibate nun, instead of marrying a man, marries Christ Himself. A priest, instead of marry a woman, marries the Church herself. There is still a marriage any way you cut it. The main difference is in the focuss; to either A) raise a Saint, or B) become a Saint yourself.

The question is which one is God calling you to.

 

[CRitabe]

and it is a very difficult sacrifice to make, hence it is indeed a great feat.

It would seem to me that if God calls me to be a Priest or Nun and one of the prerequisites is to be celibate - then, "celibacy" would be a "gift" from God and not a personal sacrifice. Obviously this was the case for St. Paul since he spoke of others needing to marry rather than burn - obviously, he did not burn from desire or lust of the flesh. I would be of the mind-set that God, who has created all things, would definately have the ability to remove from me all sexual desires, temptations and urges and if he called me to be "celibate", then, I would certainly expect that he would do that for me. Thus, it would not be a sacrifice for me or a great feat since there would not be anything I was overcoming, but something that I had been delivered from. It would not be of my strength, but the strength of God through me.

I have issue sometimes with people who take the vow of celibacy with the belief that they have to "control themselves" and "sacrifice" themselves because that does not have a tendency to work very well. The issues just get shoved to the side or submerged and come out as deviant Priests who molest young people or Nuns who are physically and emotionally abusive to children in schools.

While I believe that God does call some to be Priests, teachers, prophets, etc... I believe that if he is doing the calling, he is also doing the equipping - as St. Paul says, "thoroughly equipped" and if we are thoroughly equipped, then we are not having to "struggle" or "sacrifice" or actually "choose" - the choice would have been made for us. Right??

Peace be with you.

 

[MLT09713]

I've declared myself to be willingly celibate. It may seem ridiculous, since I'm only fifteen years old, but it feels like the thing meant for me.