Dealing with loss

[Tabasco]

One of my friends was killed last Friday in a motorcycle accident. I'm finding it difficult to accept this loss, especially since I'm not certain he went to Heaven. (I know it isn't my place to determine, but the thought that he might be in Hell cannot escape my mind). How am I supposed to deal with this?

Note: I am not interested in hearing from Universalists and/or Liberals on the subject of Hell (with all due respect). Please keep it Biblical. Thank you.

 

[ReformedChapin]

Hello my Calvinistic brother. I think one thing that us reformed folk have learned is that we should trust God in all things. Wherever your friend is at God had ultimate authority and he did it for the ultimate good. Trust God in all things and remember God turns all bad things for good.


Now for couping. There's nothing anyone can say here to make you feel better. Just give it time. Time has a thing for healing wounds.

 

[AnneSally]

One of my friends was killed last Friday in a motorcycle accident. I'm finding it difficult to accept this loss

Oh no, so sorry to hear about your loss. Sympathies.

 

[Cris413]

One of my friends was killed last Friday in a motorcycle accident. I'm finding it difficult to accept this loss, especially since I'm not certain he went to Heaven. (I know it isn't my place to determine, but the thought that he might be in Hell cannot escape my mind). How am I supposed to deal with this?

Note: I am not interested in hearing from Universalists and/or Liberals on the subject of Hell (with all due respect). Please keep it Biblical. Thank you.

(((hugs)))...I'm so sorry for your loss. I know exactly what you're going through...when I lost my mom...I found great comfort in knowing she accepted Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior before she died.

I don't have the same comfort over the loss of my father...as he died when I was quite young and I have no idea what his faith was...I won't know until I get there....but as RC mentioned...our faith and trust in God is of great comfort.

Recently I lost my beloved dog...Sarai...and I know it's no where near experiencing the loss of a person so near and dear to us...but it was/is none the less very painful for me...as even as much as I would love to think all dogs go to Heaven...the truth is that's not plainly supported by Scripture one way or the other.

(I would very much appreciate this thread not being derailed by whether or not pets go the Heaven out of respect to the OP...and it's still a very tender spot in my heart)

The reason I mention the loss of my dog is this...our God is THE Great God of Comfort....even in the small things like the loss of a beloved pet...His comfort is there...so how much more is His comfort in the loss of loved ones...friends and family.

I do find some comfort in considering...even though we may be confident our loved one never accepted Christ...we have no way of knowing what happened in their hearts and minds right before death.

I personally believe it's possible for people to accept the Lord even in a brief moment before death...Just as the Lord appeared to Paul on the Damascus Road...He can certainly appear to our loved ones at that crucial moment as well...of course this is speculation on my part...but I see no reason to limit the Lord's reach in such circumstances.

The example of the theif on the cross to me...is evidence of immanent death conversions.

Lean on the Lord...trust in Him...and He will surround you in His comfort.

 

[ladyt28]

Tabasco, first I want to say that I am so very sorry - it is so hard to loose a loved one! I have been where you are at my friend. I cannot speak for anyone other than myself - when I catch myself starting to wonder if my friends and family were saved and if they are in heaven, I have to stop - there's no way to get an answer until the day we join our Lord Father. For myself, I suspect it is part of my tendency to "think of" thiings rather than pray and give it all to God. When the thought bothers me, I amp up my prayers to be used by God to be a good witness and help bring the lost to His fold by being the seed that only He can germinate. (oh, darn it but I wish I knew where scriptures were better than I do!!).
So God bless you brother, may the Lord comfort you!

 

[-~Truth_N_Trust~-]

One of my friends was killed last Friday in a motorcycle accident. I'm finding it difficult to accept this loss, especially since I'm not certain he went to Heaven. (I know it isn't my place to determine, but the thought that he might be in Hell cannot escape my mind). How am I supposed to deal with this?

Note: I am not interested in hearing from Universalists and/or Liberals on the subject of Hell (with all due respect). Please keep it Biblical. Thank you.

Tabasco, I am very sorry to hear about your friend.

It's amazing that you posted this, I nearly posted the same thing myself! My Grandmother died last week, and I have no assurance that she knew the Lord at all. And it feels very heavy on my heart at the moment, because while everyone is saying 'she's not in pain anymore' - I can't say the same for sure! All I can do is pray - without knowing what to say.

Thankyou Reformed Chaplain for your words, I needed to be reminded to Trust God in all things.

ladyt28 I am the same

For myself, I suspect it is part of my tendency to "think of" thiings rather than pray and give it all to God.

, I also tend to think of and talk about God rather than talk TO God. Thankyou for the reminder to pray, pray, pray.

 

[Blank123]

i'm so sorry for your loss

i can understand what you're going through, i lost my uncle years ago very suddenly as well and i don't have any peace over where he is spending eternity because i don't know that he ever accepted Christ. Its not an easy feeling but ultimately all we can do is trust that God is just and He is in control. Only He knows right now where your friend is and like ladyt28 said we can't know until we're on the other side where our loved ones ended up.

In the mean time its okay to go to the Lord in your grieving and talk to Him about how your feeling and your fears and such and if you need to vent further we're all here for you

 

[CyberPaladin]

I know what you mean Tabasco I often wonder about my one Grandmother if she made it into heaven. Naturaly we won't know until we reach the other side but let's put it this way it would be a surprise.

 

[Tabasco]

In the past few days, God has given me a great deal of peace.

Thank you all for your prayers.

 

[Nadiine]

So far I have not lost anyone close to me who
we knew weren't Christians (or who hadn't at least accepted Christ
as their health deteriorated)...
so I can't "feel" what this feels like yet.

I just want to give you my sympathies for your loss - I truly
hate death & everything about it, and that I can feel for sure as
we all experience that pain together.

God bless you, I hope the Lord continues to give you peace
about this.


(and welcome to CF too) =0)

 

[AnneSally]

In the past few days, God has given me a great deal of peace.

Thank you all for your prayers.

That is so wonderful.....May God always give you peace....

 

[GreenMunchkin]

How are you now, Tabasco?