Dealing with inappropriate content, marijuana & alcohol as a female Christian

[TheStrugglingChristian]

God promised victory, but you and I have to claim the authority to win the skirmish. The battle was already won at Calvary, but you and I must claim the skirmishes and the victory. I find that I have victory over sin in my life when I approach each day acknowledging how capable I am of sinning or falling into sin. I admit every single day that I’m capable of lust, vain imagination, deceit, stealing, cheating, and laziness. And by approaching each day by admitting my vulnerability to sin, I find that I am in a better position to guard my heart and live by all the applicable promises of God that He gave me in order to have strength and victory over sin. To claim the victory and take the authority of Jesus, you and I must stand firm on every promise of God given to us in the scripture. For it written:

• “No weapon formed against you will prevail” – Isaiah 54:7
• “The One who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.” – 1 John 4:4
• “Thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through the Lord Jesus Christ” – 1 Corinthians 15:57
• “But thanks be to God who always leads us in a triumphant procession in Christ Jesus” – 2 Corinthians 2:14
• “No temptation has ceased you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will provide a way out so that you can endure it” – 1 Corinthians 10:13

Deal with Sin!

Defeating Addiction

I don't think I do that enough. I will start my days admitting the things I have trouble with from now on. Thank you for the scriptures . Everyone has been so kind and helpful here. I feel blessed to have found a safe place

 

[☦Marius☦]

I'll be honest, I've been having a really tough time with these sins. And right now I'm really wanting to smoke, but I know I'll feel guilty about it and it will make my mood worse. I was doing so well with not looking at inappropriate content and masturbating but I failed the other day. I feel like I will always just fail no matter how much progress I make. And I know I've been taking steps to better myself and my walk with God. I joined a new church that my friends brought me too and have even been making new Christian friends and going to worship and prayer nights. But I still feel disconnected alot. I look at everyone else and wish I could be that close to God and not want to do all of these sins, but I keep failing... and I feel God is keeping things away from me like finding a husband because of all of these issues. I'm really emotionally tired about it all to be honest. Why is this so hard? Thanks for reading this. I didn't want to bother any of my friends. I've never even told them about my issue with inappropriate content.

I struggle with all these things as well. However as someone who deals with heavy sometimes crippling depression, I have a pastoral blessing to smoke weed until I can get to a psychologist and get on proper medication. I work rediculous hours and a little weed at the end of the day can relax me and give me opportunity to be more prayerful. I'm not recommending based on your situation (that's up to you) , but I do understand it. As for the alcohol, it's not a sin to drink in moderation. If you can taper it down perhaps it won't be as much as a problem.

I say all this based on my own strengths and weaknesses. If these things lead to full on abuse and you can't touch it then that's what you should do. I just don't think we are personally judged as much based on the chaos and mental illness in modern society. It's a broad topic of much debate. Just know Christ will save you from whatever he feels you need to be free of. You will know what is spiritually beneficial to you by the conviction of the Holy Spirit.

inappropriate content is definitely the killer here though. inappropriate content destroys the mind and is perhaps the most addictive of all these things. I've done quite a bit of cocaine and been able to drop it easy, but inappropriate content? They say it is as addictive or worse than cocaine. Treat it as that much of a danger and see if you can get fully away from electronics. You might not quit entirely but removal from electronics for a time can help decrease the frequency as well as kind of reset the perversions one picks up while watching such filth.

Christ be with you.

 

[Vicky gould]

May the Lord lead you in all wisdom that only he can provide us.

 

[Christ is Lord]

I'll be honest, I've been having a really tough time with these sins. And right now I'm really wanting to smoke, but I know I'll feel guilty about it and it will make my mood worse. I was doing so well with not looking at inappropriate content and masturbating but I failed the other day. I feel like I will always just fail no matter how much progress I make. And I know I've been taking steps to better myself and my walk with God. I joined a new church that my friends brought me too and have even been making new Christian friends and going to worship and prayer nights. But I still feel disconnected alot. I look at everyone else and wish I could be that close to God and not want to do all of these sins, but I keep failing... and I feel God is keeping things away from me like finding a husband because of all of these issues. I'm really emotionally tired about it all to be honest. Why is this so hard? Thanks for reading this. I didn't want to bother any of my friends. I've never even told them about my issue with inappropriate content.

Do you have someone who you can trust that can be your accountability partner? It really helps too if they are Christian.

 

[Lucaro]

Before I give my life to Christ I had serious issues with inappropriate content and masturbation.
After my conversion, for several years I had thoughts similar to those you reported, as if I would never be able to leave these practices.
In my case this was a process. At the beginning it used to happen every day, so I focused on getting it down to six days a week. Then for five days a week. At one point, I focused on practicing every other day. After that, once a week. After that, twice a month. Then once a month.
Each of these steps lasted a long time. It was not a progress of weeks, but of years, especially the first steps.
Today it's been five and a half years since it happened for the last time, thank God. Now I am freed from this practice and I tell you not to be discouraged and also not to think that God has given you up for it. He loves you, let His grace abound in your life.

 

[PizzaAddict]

I'll be honest, I've been having a really tough time with these sins. And right now I'm really wanting to smoke, but I know I'll feel guilty about it and it will make my mood worse. I was doing so well with not looking at inappropriate content and masturbating but I failed the other day. I feel like I will always just fail no matter how much progress I make. And I know I've been taking steps to better myself and my walk with God. I joined a new church that my friends brought me too and have even been making new Christian friends and going to worship and prayer nights. But I still feel disconnected alot. I look at everyone else and wish I could be that close to God and not want to do all of these sins, but I keep failing... and I feel God is keeping things away from me like finding a husband because of all of these issues. I'm really emotionally tired about it all to be honest. Why is this so hard? Thanks for reading this. I didn't want to bother any of my friends. I've never even told them about my issue with inappropriate content.

1.God designed male and female to reproduce and have fun together .
Your real problem is having no husband

1 Timothy 5
14 I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.

1 Corinthians 7:9 King James Version (KJV)
9 But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.

God is not telling you to not have husband or punishing you withdrawing the ability to find one , simply find one from church or online christian dating is an option aswell.

If you watched inappropriate content while being married that would be something different than what you experience now , you simply burn with lust for husband.



2.Smoking weed is not bad nor is it prohibited , actually weed is herb and can be digested , also used to heal many sickness plus is used in preparing anointing oil in Bible.

The real issue is you simply use alcohol and weed as something to forget for a while that you have problems and use it as an escape. Fix whatever is bothering you , get husband and you will be fine. Don't run away from your problems face them.

 

[TheStrugglingChristian]

I struggle with all these things as well. However as someone who deals with heavy sometimes crippling depression, I have a pastoral blessing to smoke weed until I can get to a psychologist and get on proper medication. I work rediculous hours and a little weed at the end of the day can relax me and give me opportunity to be more prayerful. I'm not recommending based on your situation (that's up to you) , but I do understand it. As for the alcohol, it's not a sin to drink in moderation. If you can taper it down perhaps it won't be as much as a problem.

I say all this based on my own strengths and weaknesses. If these things lead to full on abuse and you can't touch it then that's what you should do. I just don't think we are personally judged as much based on the chaos and mental illness in modern society. It's a broad topic of much debate. Just know Christ will save you from whatever he feels you need to be free of. You will know what is spiritually beneficial to you by the conviction of the Holy Spirit.

inappropriate content is definitely the killer here though. inappropriate content destroys the mind and is perhaps the most addictive of all these things. I've done quite a bit of cocaine and been able to drop it easy, but inappropriate content? They say it is as addictive or worse than cocaine. Treat it as that much of a danger and see if you can get fully away from electronics. You might not quit entirely but removal from electronics for a time can help decrease the frequency as well as kind of reset the perversions one picks up while watching such filth.

Christ be with you.

I love that you mentioned this. I personally don't have a problem with people smoking weed for medical reasons. If it's proven to help some ailments and illness for people that need it then I think it's better than taking pills. With that being said, i personally started using weed (and alcohol when i didnt have weed) as an emotional crutch. I would smoke all day everyday and get nothing done. Wake up, smoke, go to work, smoke, go home and eat, smoke. Some people can smoke only when they're done with work, but I have a hard time with that control. So I do believe God put a conviction on my heart for it since I was abusing it.

 

[TheStrugglingChristian]

Do you have someone who you can trust that can be your accountability partner? It really helps too if they are Christian.

I do have one friend who I've talked to about other things before. She has always said I can go to her about anything, but the inappropriate content thing really ashames me. I don't like being judged or criticised and it would break my heart if she thought lower of me....

 

[ByTheSpirit]

whatever sin I happen to be dealing with, I tell God, "Father, unless you help me overcome I can do nothing else."

I try to have that mentality, it helps me cast all that onto him. It takes the burden off my shoulders, like God, I'm a sinner. I can do nothing but sin so if you dont intervene I am doomed.

May not work for everyone, but it does for me.

Just remember, God knows all things and he chose to love you even with the knowledge of your failures. Remember that.

As others have stated, being made holy is a process. You cant do it alone, trust in God. The stronger your urges get, the stronger your prayers should get. If you fail, confess and set your mind to God and be determined to trust him next time.

 

[Healing with Jesus]

Sister, I hope you are reassured to know you're not alone in your struggles. You've gotten some wise encouragement here and I will add my two cents.

First of all, always turn to Jesus and our Father, constantly. Know that the Holy Spirit lives in you and trust in Him. Confess your sins regularly.
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
‭‭1 John‬ ‭1:9‬ ‭KJV‬‬

He does the cleansing when we confess. Yay. We do our part too, obedience. Obey in every instance you CAN. There will be times you can't / don't (hence confession). But whenever you are able to make a choice for God, do it! Even if it's a small choice. (And then confess when you don't.)

It's natural to be ashamed in front of men and women. Fallen world, and some masquerade as angels of light who aren't. Be wise as a snake and innocent as a dove. But don't let embarrassment keep you from God, ever. He already knows what you do anyway!

In my experience, substance use makes it easier for sexual sins to enter the mind, where they start. Much easier. You've been convicted about all three issues and that's very good. Rid your home of the substances and their paraphernalia, immediately and totally. Don't look back. Just get rid of it all.

Don't be afraid to lose people. (How many people wanted to kill Jesus?) You will and it will not be fun. Sigh, welcome to the "boring" life. But why have the whole world and lose your soul? God's calling you to something. Something more pure. Maybe for marriage, maybe for ministry. You have a thirst. What a blessing! You'll be able to discern His Spirit better. Now that's exciting, anything but boring!

All I can say is that it gets easier. Within weeks of quitting smoking weed, I had so much more clarity about my life. I didn't even realize what a problem it had become. Smoking makes it difficult to make changes in life. Nearly impossible to implement big changes, or even see what needs to change. Just get rid of it. You'll be so happy that you did and wonder why you didn't sooner. This comes from someone who absolutely loves pot and everything about it. I miss things about it, the rituals and sense elements, but I don't miss what it did to my brain and my life.

Alcohol was pretty easy for me to give up, so I can't comment too much on that one. Frankly, I still struggle with sexual sin, in my mind anyway. inappropriate content-- just refuse to go there. You could install inappropriate content-blocking software on your phone / devices...

Sis, it is wise to be careful who you trust. A licensed addictions counselor is legally bound to maintain confidentiality except in certain circumstances (in the US). You might really benefit from that type of relationship. I'd recommend seeing a female, especially if your sexual temptations are usually male.

Many blessings to you sis and I pray that the Lord will empower you to conquer these and every sin you struggle with. Pray for me too cuz I'm also a saint in distress! We can do this together

 

[Charles Kanyuga]

I'll be honest, I've been having a really tough time with these sins. And right now I'm really wanting to smoke, but I know I'll feel guilty about it and it will make my mood worse. I was doing so well with not looking at inappropriate content and masturbating but I failed the other day. I feel like I will always just fail no matter how much progress I make. And I know I've been taking steps to better myself and my walk with God. I joined a new church that my friends brought me too and have even been making new Christian friends and going to worship and prayer nights. But I still feel disconnected alot. I look at everyone else and wish I could be that close to God and not want to do all of these sins, but I keep failing... and I feel God is keeping things away from me like finding a husband because of all of these issues. I'm really emotionally tired about it all to be honest. Why is this so hard? Thanks for reading this. I didn't want to bother any of my friends. I've never even told them about my issue with inappropriate content.

The most important thing is that you acknowledge your struggle. That is how God wants it.
I will give you a simple analogy of what you are struggling with and dust of the ground that God used to make man. You understand dust is something that people don't like to associate with it often related to dirt. God preferred the weakest part of the earth to make a home for himself that is dust... What am I saying? What you are struggling with can be equated to the dust of the ground that God used to make us all. You are not far from God, actually you are in His holy hands forming you to become a great person whom he can relate with so closely.
As you fellowship with other Christians (don't worry about their attitude towards your struggles), God will help you step by step to overcome all. There is a scripture that says that Christ was counted among sinners.. it tells you that His business right now is to walk with you even in your weakest moment and you shall not be overwhelmed by these struggles.
Keep on going to Church, make more and more christian friends... seek for a mature one who you can be sharing your struggles with in the end you will be free.
You are not far from God... He's God you. You are not a sinner any more in Christ because he does not condemn you but wants to help you overcome all struggles... The bible says we are more than conquerors through Christ.

 

[Thir7ySev3n]

I'll be honest, I've been having a really tough time with these sins. And right now I'm really wanting to smoke, but I know I'll feel guilty about it and it will make my mood worse. I was doing so well with not looking at inappropriate content and masturbating but I failed the other day. I feel like I will always just fail no matter how much progress I make. And I know I've been taking steps to better myself and my walk with God. I joined a new church that my friends brought me too and have even been making new Christian friends and going to worship and prayer nights. But I still feel disconnected alot. I look at everyone else and wish I could be that close to God and not want to do all of these sins, but I keep failing... and I feel God is keeping things away from me like finding a husband because of all of these issues. I'm really emotionally tired about it all to be honest. Why is this so hard? Thanks for reading this. I didn't want to bother any of my friends. I've never even told them about my issue with inappropriate content.

This is not a small issue to keep failing in. Many Christians (true and falsely so-called) have struggled in the area of sexual purity and so have a stake in minimizing the consequences of it. The fact that you felt like this was a "safe space" for it as well is disturbing, since the Scripture commands we do not associate with someone who is called a brother and is guilty of sexual immorality, not even to eat with them until they repent (1 Corinthians 5:11; note, New Testament command).

This is why sins like this are allowed to carry on, because no one puts the fear of God in you and corporately disciplines the guilty person, giving them due shame and suffering of loss. I fear for a house full of delinquent children to whom the Father has to return to an absentee mother shirking her duty to carry on the Father's disciplines. Why should you have to suffer God directly rather than the first grace at the hands of mere men?

I am not here to be friendly to you, but to urge you to repent and otherwise not associate with you, since you call yourself a sister, and are guilty of sexual immorality.

"Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap." (Galatians 6:7)

Worse than this, if you set yourself up this way, and get married, you will be more inclined to commit adultery, which will only compound the severity of your sin. Learn to not indulge now.

"No one who abides in him keeps on sinning; no one who keeps on sinning has either seen him or known him. Little children, let no one deceive you. Whoever practices righteousness is righteous, as he is righteous. Whoever makes a practice of sinning is of the devil, for the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the works of the devil." (1 John 3:6-8)

 

[TheStrugglingChristian]

This is not a small issue to keep failing in. Many Christians (true and falsely so-called) have struggled in the area of sexual purity and so have a stake in minimizing the consequences of it. The fact that you felt like this was a "safe space" for it as well is disturbing, since the Scripture commands we do not associate with someone who is called a brother and is guilty of sexual immorality, not even to eat with them until they repent (1 Corinthians 5:11; note, New Testament command).

This is why sins like this are allowed to carry on, because no one puts the fear of God in you and corporately disciplines the guilty person, giving them due shame and suffering of loss. I fear for a house full of delinquent children to whom the Father has to return to an absentee mother shirking her duty to carry on the Father's disciplines. Why should you have to suffer God directly rather than the first grace at the hands of mere men?

I am not here to be friendly to you, but to urge you to repent and otherwise not associate with you, since you call yourself a sister, and are guilty of sexual immorality.

"Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap." (Galatians 6:7)

Worse than this, if you set yourself up this way, and get married, you will be more inclined to commit adultery, which will only compound the severity of your sin. Learn to not indulge now.

"No one who abides in him keeps on sinning; no one who keeps on sinning has either seen him or known him. Little children, let no one deceive you. Whoever practices righteousness is righteous, as he is righteous. Whoever makes a practice of sinning is of the devil, for the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the works of the devil." (1 John 3:6-8)

Must be difficult for you being perfect.

 

[Thir7ySev3n]

Must be difficult for you being perfect.

If you gather to yourself ten thousand forum members and a hundred churches to comfort you and associate with you while continuing to partake of this sin, you have not "let no one deceive you." (1 John 3:7) Rather, what you have done is partake of this:

"For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths." (2 Timothy 4:3-4)

"Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous." (Hebrews 13:4)

 

[Christ is Lord]

I do have one friend who I've talked to about other things before. She has always said I can go to her about anything, but the inappropriate content thing really ashames me. I don't like being judged or criticised and it would break my heart if she thought lower of me....

Unfortunately, that's what some addictions do to people. It keep them in the closet so to speak; and keeps eating away at them. I really think an accountability partner will help you in your struggle. However, I believe ultimately God can free you from this addiction. I will keep you in my prayers.

 

[Christ is Lord]

Unfortunately, that's what some addictions do to people. It keep them in the closet so to speak; and keeps eating away at them. I really think an accountability partner will help you in your struggle. However, I believe ultimately God can free you from this addiction. I will keep you in my prayers.

Some people even get accountability partners (online) that have the same addiction in a way to 'bare each other's burdens'. The concept of accountability can be useful and I think that's why AA has the sponsor concept.

 

[TheStrugglingChristian]

If you gather to yourself ten thousand forum members and a hundred churches to comfort you and associate with you while continuing to partake of this sin, you have not "let no one deceive you." (1 John 3:7) Rather, what you have done is partake of this:

"For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths." (2 Timothy 4:3-4)

"Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous." (Hebrews 13:4)

"For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me."
Romans7:18‭-‬20

I know what I do is sinful. And I pray and ask forgiveness about it everyday. I also am aware of all of those scriptures you have quoted. I am not blind to what God has said. With that being said, I appreciate the kind words, and also the strict ones.

 

[Talihood]

Satan preys on the weak. Be stronger each day.

 

[dqhall]

I'll be honest, I've been having a really tough time with these sins. And right now I'm really wanting to smoke, but I know I'll feel guilty about it and it will make my mood worse. I was doing so well with not looking at inappropriate content and masturbating but I failed the other day. I feel like I will always just fail no matter how much progress I make. And I know I've been taking steps to better myself and my walk with God. I joined a new church that my friends brought me too and have even been making new Christian friends and going to worship and prayer nights. But I still feel disconnected alot. I look at everyone else and wish I could be that close to God and not want to do all of these sins, but I keep failing... and I feel God is keeping things away from me like finding a husband because of all of these issues. I'm really emotionally tired about it all to be honest. Why is this so hard? Thanks for reading this. I didn't want to bother any of my friends. I've never even told them about my issue with inappropriate content.

Jesus preached against adultery and lust. Masturbation is a sin of lust.
Premarital sex is wrong. inappropriate content is sinful.

Marijuana is not approved by the FDA for any medical use. A New Zealand study estimated 10% of their lung cancer is from smoking marijuana. Marijuana has been shown to cause retarded brain development in adolescents. Marijuana is a hallucinogen blamed for increased risk of auto accidents. Don’t smoke dope.

Excessive alcohol use is the leading cause of early onset dementia. Drinking more than one serving a day puts a woman at elevated risk of breast cancer. Alcohol use was a contributing factor in numerous traffic accidents.

 

[Thir7ySev3n]

"For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me."
Romans7:18‭-‬20

I know what I do is sinful. And I pray and ask forgiveness about it everyday. I also am aware of all of those scriptures you have quoted. I am not blind to what God has said. With that being said, I appreciate the kind words, and also the strict ones.

That Scripture can be easily abused to mean something it does not, as is made clear by Paul's subsequent statements a few verses over. But consider these warnings first:

"For certain persons have crept in unnoticed, those who were long beforehand marked out for this condemnation, ungodly persons who turn the grace of our God into licentiousness [license for immorality] and deny our only Master and Lord, Jesus Christ." (Jude 1:4)

Again: "No one who abides in him keeps on sinning; no one who keeps on sinning has either seen him or known him. Little children, let no one deceive you. Whoever practices righteousness is righteous, as he is righteous. Whoever makes a practice of sinning is of the devil, for the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the works of the devil. No one born of God makes a practice of sinning, for God’s seed abides in him, and he cannot keep on sinning because he has been born of God." (1 John 3:6-9)

And Paul, after making the same case the next chapter over from what you quoted: "So then, brothers, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh. For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live." (Romans 8:12-13)