I appreciate Mrs. Enigma's post earlier today about an article on anger. Since I am not directly responding about that article, however, I thought it best to begin a separate thread on anger management.
I just wanted to share what I have realized about dealing with anger, and I wanted to see what you all think of it. Essentially, my thought is that God's *empathy* with us is a powerful tool for diffusing anger.
My story: I have a history of letting people walk all over me, which has over time resulted in a habit of getting angry when anyone expresses anger towards me. I guess I've lived so much of my life "giving" to people, I feel I don't have much "give" left -- and what's more, if someone gets mad at me, I feel like they are "taking."
I deal with the public a lot in my line of work. These days -- even in spite of my recent "realization" -- when someone complains about something I've done, I often do take it personally. Automatically, I feel threatened, I feel wronged. When I try to remember what Jesus' example was and His commands about forgiveness, it doesn't always help. His ways don't seem to sink in; I struggle with anger.
Some people try to deal with anger by understanding the other person has a point of view, too, but I have a hard time with that. No offense, but when I'm angry, part of me really doesn't care that about the other person's point of view, because I don't feel he or she is trying to understand MY point of view.
So that's where God's understanding comes in. Since I know He sees my point of view and my reasons for doing things, even if this other person doesn't, I don't feel I have to Prove myself or justify my actions in order to win validation. I think God's love and empathy are the bridge to my being able to give a more temperate response to people who criticize me. For me, it makes all the difference in the world that God is with me ("on my side") and I am not alone.
Peace.
I just wanted to share what I have realized about dealing with anger, and I wanted to see what you all think of it. Essentially, my thought is that God's *empathy* with us is a powerful tool for diffusing anger.
My story: I have a history of letting people walk all over me, which has over time resulted in a habit of getting angry when anyone expresses anger towards me. I guess I've lived so much of my life "giving" to people, I feel I don't have much "give" left -- and what's more, if someone gets mad at me, I feel like they are "taking."
I deal with the public a lot in my line of work. These days -- even in spite of my recent "realization" -- when someone complains about something I've done, I often do take it personally. Automatically, I feel threatened, I feel wronged. When I try to remember what Jesus' example was and His commands about forgiveness, it doesn't always help. His ways don't seem to sink in; I struggle with anger.
Some people try to deal with anger by understanding the other person has a point of view, too, but I have a hard time with that. No offense, but when I'm angry, part of me really doesn't care that about the other person's point of view, because I don't feel he or she is trying to understand MY point of view.
So that's where God's understanding comes in. Since I know He sees my point of view and my reasons for doing things, even if this other person doesn't, I don't feel I have to Prove myself or justify my actions in order to win validation. I think God's love and empathy are the bridge to my being able to give a more temperate response to people who criticize me. For me, it makes all the difference in the world that God is with me ("on my side") and I am not alone.
Peace.
