Daughter getting into our bed

[Kelly]

Our daughter crawls into our bed almost every night, sometime while we are sleeping. We have an infant son and when he cries for a feeding, I wake up and discover our 5 y.o. daughter between us.

If I wake her up and tell her to go to her own bed, she starts crying and wakes EVERYBODY up pitching her fits. So I usually pick her up and deposit her back into her bed.

Not only is the lack of privacy an issue, but she tosses and turns when she sleeps, I often awake when I take a foot to the head or get an arm or leg draped around my neck, we have a queen size bed and I end up getting about a foot of it.

Any of you have this problem and how did you deal with it?

 

[andiesmama]

Sorry Kelly, no help from me! I only have a 2 year old & haven't run into that problem as of yet, but I'd probably do the same as you, just take her & put her back into her bed, that's what I've read, anyways! Hopefully she'll grow out of it soon....any possibility she's jealous of the new baby? Just a thought!! Good luck!!

 

[Why?]

I have a six year old... and we need a bigger bed again. lol

If you find an answer let me know.

 

[BeanMak]

I had the same problem with both of mine when they hit the age of 3 til about 7. I dealt with this by putting a sleeping bag and pillow on the floor by my bed. That way nobody gets woken up, you don't get squished by a restless sleepery, your older child doesn't feel like she's being left out, and everyone sleeps better. Just make sure you jump when getting out of bed
btw, it is no longer an issue... I just am glad that they still sleep at home (they are 19 and 21)

 

[HeatherJay]

Our daughter crawls into our bed almost every night, sometime while we are sleeping. We have an infant son and when he cries for a feeding, I wake up and discover our 5 y.o. daughter between us.

If I wake her up and tell her to go to her own bed, she starts crying and wakes EVERYBODY up pitching her fits. So I usually pick her up and deposit her back into her bed.

Not only is the lack of privacy an issue, but she tosses and turns when she sleeps, I often awake when I take a foot to the head or get an arm or leg draped around my neck, we have a queen size bed and I end up getting about a foot of it.

Any of you have this problem and how did you deal with it?

She's probably feeling a little jealous and left out with the new baby. The idea about a sleeping bag on the floor is a good one. This isn't something she's likely to continue...she sounds like she just wants some extra attention...a little reassurance that she's still special and equally important to mommy and daddy. Maybe sit down and talk to her about the situation...not in the middle of the night, but during the day when everyone is wide awake and rational.

 

[bliz]

We made our bed bigger. We started with putting the crib beside the bed, then we went to a twin sized bed, and we ended up with a queen and a full shoved together on their box springs on the bed. Our kids are young adults now... but we would family bed it again if we had the chance. It was one of the smartest thing we ever did as parents!

Your daughter wants to be with you! She finds comfort and security with you... and you want to chase her away? Put her on the bed beside your bed to go to leep. You'll have a lot more room for her tossing and turning but you'll still be able to reach out and pat her and touch her and you will get more rest and her needs to be near you will be met.

 

[HeatherJay]

I aso have to agree with Bliz. I don't mind my kiddies crawling into bed with us. They don't need me all the time anymore, but I really embrace those times when they do need a few extra cuddles. I guess it all depends on where you stand on co-sleeping.

 

[Crofter]

I don't think it's a matter of jealousy... I often think it's a shame this rather unpleasant attribute is used to describe the awful disruption and turmoil of emotions a young child must go through on the arrival of a new sibling because everything in their life changes and they see their parents change and become quite exhausted and suddenly expect a new maturity from the older child at a time that being mature and strong is just not so easy.

So I'd go with what folk say here and maybe if you wake up and find her with you make sure you sound delighted and give her a cuddle and in time wean her back to being comfortable and secure on her own... or even invite her into bed for cuddles and as she becomes more secure she will relax. And in the day make sure she has her time... her own time when she is no1 ...even if these are few and short and not even a crying baby will disrupt that time because she is your number one special baby for that moment.

I always told my daughter she was my favourate toddler and she was my favourate daughter and she was my favourate 6 year old and so on... when she got older she laughed because she knew my lad was my favourate son and favourate 4 year old and so on... but it helped her to see that to me she was the most special Rachel in the world and having the most special David in the world was never going to alter that fact.

 

[cinni]

i had this issue and i just put my daughter back in her bed time and time again till she got the message it took alot of consistency but it was worth it in the end, however since shes waking everyone thats something else that could be dealt with seperately maybe if you gave her incentives to sleep in her own bed at the end of the week she will get a reward soemthing small or the following day maybe something as small as a sticker or something.

Anyway hope you work it out

*hugs* hang in there and keep praying

 

[selune]

Our daughter crawls into our bed almost every night, sometime while we are sleeping. We have an infant son and when he cries for a feeding, I wake up and discover our 5 y.o. daughter between us.

If I wake her up and tell her to go to her own bed, she starts crying and wakes EVERYBODY up pitching her fits. So I usually pick her up and deposit her back into her bed.

Not only is the lack of privacy an issue, but she tosses and turns when she sleeps, I often awake when I take a foot to the head or get an arm or leg draped around my neck, we have a queen size bed and I end up getting about a foot of it.

Any of you have this problem and how did you deal with it?

our 4 year old does this (he hates going back to a chilly bed after getting up to go to the bathroom) and we too have a baby nursing. Don't wake her. Nobody like to be woken in the middle of the night (I'd pitch a fit too ). You answered this yourself, just deposit her back in her bed with a gentle hug.

Tell her before she goes to bed that on a Sat. morning or other morning when you're not rushing, she is welcome to come in for a special cuddle. Give her some cuddles in her bed before she goes to sleep.

The wiggling is hard to sleep with (our 6 year old was a little wiggly furnace, and when she went through this it was difficult).

All that being said, it won't last and there are times when I swear I'll cry when no little toddler is there to seek comfort and cuddles from me. They'll all be grown and on their own all too soon.

 

[IslandBreeze]

Don't you guys have locks on your bedroom doors?

 

[tonya]

Don't you guys have locks on your bedroom doors?

I am not trying to start a riot here..BUT..I could NEVER dream of locking my little one out of my room!!!

 

[Jillian1527]

Yep count me in too. My 5 year old still sleeps with us. Every night she comes in at about 1 ish. There are times where I like it.shes very cuddly. and times where I hate it b/c shes a bed hog.I have just decided that hubby and I both are to lazy to put her back into her bed so I should just enjoy it while I can. I know it wont last forever.
Have you tried making a chart or something. Like for the nights that she dont get into bed with you she will get a star and after so many stars she will get a treat? these things usually work great with little ones.