Dating

[mercyy]

Hello everyone! I'm a teenager in high school who is dating someone and with that comes a lot of social pressures. I just need some advice on how I can make sure my conduct is appropriate for what God would want. More specifically, I know that I will stay chaste and pure until marriage, but how do I tell my boyfriend this? Are we allowed to hold hands and kiss, ect? Or would that be inappropriate? I just need some guidance and honest opinions. Thanks so much everyone, God bless!

 

[ann216]

tell him sex is for marriage and show him scpiture becareful men can be pigs they r horn dogs

 

[Albion]

Hello everyone! I'm a teenager in high school who is dating someone and with that comes a lot of social pressures. I just need some advice on how I can make sure my conduct is appropriate for what God would want. More specifically, I know that I will stay chaste and pure until marriage, but how do I tell my boyfriend this? Are we allowed to hold hands and kiss, ect? Or would that be inappropriate? I just need some guidance and honest opinions. Thanks so much everyone, God bless!

Yes of course you can do that. Many couples your age do just fine like that, but if he doesn't want to live this way more than a few weeks or months, it will show up soon enough and you will know he's not the right choice.

 

[Sketcher]

You can hold hands and even kiss, just mean it when you do. Don't deceive or use somebody.

 

[Rhamiel]

do not make it sound like you do not want to have sex just because you do not
he will just try to convince you to change your mind
explain that it is because of your faith that you want to wait untill marriage

as for the other part of your question, sorry i can not help you a lot there

 

[mercyy]

Thank you all so much! I really appreciate all the help!

 

[texaskimmy]

I would recommend The Purity Code by Jim Burns, great book about purity, dating, etc.

First, is he truly a believer? If you are, and he isn't ...beside the fact God says don't be yoked to unbelievers, its not very wise.

If he wants to have sex...dump him. A good Christian guy will be the leader in a Godly relationship and lead in a life of purity

 

[mercyy]

I would recommend The Purity Code by Jim Burns, great book about purity, dating, etc.

First, is he truly a believer? If you are, and he isn't ...beside the fact God says don't be yoked to unbelievers, its not very wise.

If he wants to have sex...dump him. A good Christian guy will be the leader in a Godly relationship and lead in a life of purity

Thanks for the recommendation! I will definitely be checking that book out!

I have another question, I haven't asked him about his religion yet because I always get to nervous. I'm really shy in public. But if I find out that he isn't a Christian, or at least isn't very religious, the best thing to do is break up? I really appreciate the advice!

 

[Rhamiel]

Thanks for the recommendation! I will definitely be checking that book out!

I have another question, I haven't asked him about his religion yet because I always get to nervous. I'm really shy in public. But if I find out that he isn't a Christian, or at least isn't very religious, the best thing to do is break up? I really appreciate the advice!

i would love to help you in any way that i can
but i think that this is the type of thing that a simple formula can not work out

my mom was not Christian when my dad started to date her, she was not christian when he married her, but now she is a christian and they have a very good marriage
so who knows?
this is something that you have to work out for yourself

i normally do not say this, my normal recomendation is to date a christian from the same or similar church as the kind you go to
but i might be wrong about this.... i dunno

 

[Albion]

Thanks for the recommendation! I will definitely be checking that book out!

I have another question, I haven't asked him about his religion yet because I always get to nervous. I'm really shy in public. But if I find out that he isn't a Christian, or at least isn't very religious, the best thing to do is break up? I really appreciate the advice!

I won't answer that by moralizing all over the place and quoting Bible verses BUT here's what "older and wiser" says about this--

IF it turns out that he's really non-religious, meaning he is convinced that religion is silly or useless, the prospects for a developing relationship are slim. Of course, you should think of yourself as a long way from marriage at this time, so merely dating a person of another or no faith isn't that big a deal IMO.

However, marriages involving a practicing Christian and a completely non-religious mate usually do not work well. Some find a "live and let live" middle ground that works, but it's very hard to achieve for most couples.

 

[belove456]

You have to be aware of the intense heartache one could experience. If he isn't a christian and doesn't have faith in Christ he will not be with you in heaven. Are you ready to invest your time, attention and love knowing he is destined for hell? on the other hand, while you are yet young and just dating it could be a wonderful opportunity to witness to him. This may be God opening a door for you to show him God's love. But you don't have to date him to show Christ's love.

 

[SouthernWinds]

Thanks for the recommendation! I will definitely be checking that book out!

I have another question, I haven't asked him about his religion yet because I always get to nervous. I'm really shy in public. But if I find out that he isn't a Christian, or at least isn't very religious, the best thing to do is break up? I really appreciate the advice!

IMO, and I know I may tick off a few of the very conservative christians here, but I do not believe it is christian to dump someone because they do not believe AT THE MOMENT you ask them.

If he says he does not believe, ask him if he would be interested in going to church with you and being open to the idea of a faith based relationship with Christ in the middle. If he really cares about you (and his heart is open) he will say yes. If not, then you should dump him. Christ did not turn away those who did not believe but had an open heart to accept him...I believe, as Christians, we should do the same.

Again, just my 2c.