Dating.....

[Bosrudorfer]

I am turning 18 yrs old and just asked out a girl who I really really care about and like and she said yes and I now have her phone number. It took me a while to ask her since I am very shy and keep to myself thus don't have that much friends or talk to girls that often but after much worry and pray I got enough courage and asked.

My question is should I dive right in and set up a date where I would pick her up and take her out for some food and a movie.

OR

Set up some times when I could hang out with her on campus (I am a Senior but and attending College in the running start program) like sit and talk in the library or cafeteria.

Another one of my problems are my parents. Being from Estonia they see dating as only when you are ready to get married which is around 25 yrs old however almost turning 18 I somewhat at times feel lonely I am very solid in the fact that I am waiting to have 'sex' until I get married yet my parents are like most parents and do worry and are somewhat over protective..

If anyone could give me some advice that would be great!

God Bless

 

[fishstix]

It all depends on how well you know her as a friend. If you don't know her very well yet, then it would be a good idea to get to know her by sitting and talking like you suggested before you get into official dating type stuff. As far as your parents go - don't lie to them or try to sneak stuff past them. Show them your maturity by not hiding stuff from them or giving the appearance that you are trying to deceive them.

 

[Bosrudorfer]

It all depends on how well you know her as a friend. If you don't know her very well yet, then it would be a good idea to get to know her by sitting and talking like you suggested before you get into official dating type stuff. As far as your parents go - don't lie to them or try to sneak stuff past them. Show them your maturity by not hiding stuff from them or giving the appearance that you are trying to deceive them.

That is the way I was leaning towards also. We had a class together 2 quaters ago and although I know alittle about her I don't know her well enough or even if she is a Chrisitan... I think I will call her and ask her if she would like to hang out around campus. Hopefully everything will go perfect and God will let me know if it is time to start getting more serious.

LOL, although I hope I don't blow it

Thanks

 

[Tenorvoice]

I would not persue a "dating" relationship with anyone untill you are ready for the responibilities of marriage. For that is the whole reason for "dating" is to compare compatability and see if a marriage will work between the two people involved.

I personaly would recomend keeping things in a group setting so the temptations of the flesh would not be a factor untill the time for a more personal relationship comes about.

And when you do want to persue a relationship with her you need to ask her father first, it does not matter how far away they live you still need to ask in order to show respect for them. If you can not talk to then in person, call, write, send an e-mail anything you need to ask a male person that is responsible for that special young lady. She deserves the respect and the honor that this brings.

peace

 

[klewlis]

I would not persue a "dating" relationship with anyone untill you are ready for the responibilities of marriage. For that is the whole reason for "dating" is to compare compatability and see if a marriage will work between the two people involved.

I personaly would recomend keeping things in a group setting so the temptations of the flesh would not be a factor untill the time for a more personal relationship comes about.

And when you do want to persue a relationship with her you need to ask her father first, it does not matter how far away they live you still need to ask in order to show respect for them. If you can not talk to then in person, call, write, send an e-mail anything you need to ask a male person that is responsible for that special young lady. She deserves the respect and the honor that this brings.

peace

You sound like you just read "I kissed dating goodbye". lol.

I find the last paragraph to be pretty extreme and very outdated. It assumes too much. What if she doesn't know her father? What if she knows her father and has a lousy relationship with him? What if she has a decent relationship but his opinion does not matter in the slightest, as far as dating goes? What if she would be greatly offended that he'd go to her father first instead of to her?

If some guy asked my dad's permission to date me, I would see it as a nice sentiment but completely misguided. My dad is the last person on earth that I would allow to approve or disapprove potential spouses for me--he is on his fourth wife, with a tendency to find the next one while still married to the last. Need I mention that he is also not a Christian? My judgment on these issues is 1000 times better than my dad's, and his opinion is not even a matter of curiosity to me.

 

[Tenorvoice]

You sound like you just read "I kissed dating goodbye". lol.

Nope just stuck in my ways

 

[fishstix]

you need to ask a male person that is responsible for that special young lady.

Not all young ladies have male persons responsible for them. And many young ladies who consider themselves to be grown up would be quite offended by the suggestion that there is someone else responsible for them. Adults are responsible for themselves - male or female. So be careful on the whole asking the father first thing. While some women may want that, others could be quite offended.

 

[oldrooster]

I always respected the boys that my daughter dated that took the time to come meet me and her mother first. It shows manners that are uncommon today.

 

[fishstix]

I always respected the boys that my daughter dated that took the time to come meet me and her mother first. It shows manners that are uncommon today.

Of course the father will like being asked. The one who would potentially be offended by it is the woman herself.

 

[Bosrudorfer]

Thanks for all the feedback guys but as of now I am going to try to hang out with her on campus and talk on the phone so that I could get to know her better as she I.

 

[Lbiagm]

sounds like a good idea bos.