Date help....

Evan Wright

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So there is this girl that I'm interested in in my Human development class. Originally I saw her on the train a while back and I thought she was extremely pretty, and being around her makes me so nervous now the more I think about her. I messed up my chance to approach her in class, so I had messaged the and asked if she wanted to study together to which she said yes. Unfortunately she had caught a cold and our study date didn't happen but she suggested that we do something else to compensate and I offered to take her out to lunch instead to which she said that's fine. Now we're going to meet up after class Monday and talk about it and what we'd want to do. I'm nervous because we've never actually officially talked in person before and I'm freaking out since it'll be here before I know it. Help.

P.S. This is a continuation of my last post a while back. Have a nice day and God bless.

//www.christianforums.com/threads/how-do-i-approach-a-girl-im-interested-in.8131396/
 

Greengardener

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It might help to question the source of your fear and what it is actually saying to you. Here are a couple of ideas that come to my old mind.
1. Are you worth the blood of Jesus to save you? So not feeling worthy isn't a real issue, but it could be an issue in your thinking. (Am I worthy of her interest?) Set your thinking to agree with what God says about you in this. You are as worthy as the next person to the love of God.
2. Is your fear of being unacceptable to speak with her? Is your voice needed in the world? Do you have a message of caring, of something that God has given you to offer a needy world? Likely you have as much a voice that is needed in the world as the next believer in Christ. So set your thinking to agree with God and use your voice the way He lead you. Is your purpose to get or give? Give encouragement - it's always a safe place.
3. Will you live with whatever the outcome of this meeting is? Well, yea, my old brain says you likely will live to look back and smile at your nervousness here. Many of us can empathize with your feelings and just goodnaturedly tell you, hey, don't let it get to you. You will likely laugh at this some day. Is there the possibility of real benefit coming out of this? Certainly. So walk carefully but don't get all pretzeled in fear. Remember balance is like two kids on a see-saw - share so you both have fun. Ask questions about her and learn what she is comfortable telling you. And tell her a little about you, enough to help her see if another step is in order. Isn't that what this is about? If you end up friends, there is great gain in adding a friend. Friends come in male and female, just like people, animals, plants, and siblings. Aim there before you aim for that special relationship that only two people share, so you don't lose out on a good friendship should that not be the next step. Love seeks not its own good but the good of others.

I hope this is helpful! It's something your grandmother or grandfather might tell you, I know. But we were there once...lol.
 
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Kenny'sID

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A common problem...what is it they always say? "just be yourself"? something that might not be a good idea for some.

I'm afraid I just made things worse. :)

Seriously though, don't psych yourself out, and make things worse than they are, it'll probably go just fine.
 
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The_wanderer 40

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First, I wanted to say congratulations! You are going to meet her in person! Looking back, was your fear about asking her out justified? As the others have said, go meet up with her and be yourself. As much as you can be. That is always the best course of action. And I'd say that some apprehension about meeting her is normal because this is important to you and you want it to go well.
 
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Albion

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Think of some things you might have in common and which might be subjects for casual conversation. Be interested in her--casually ask about siblings or hobbies and of course classwork. Do not overdo anything on this first informal date or act like you have fallen in love.
 
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Tsquared

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So there is this girl that I'm interested in in my Human development class. Originally I saw her on the train a while back and I thought she was extremely pretty, and being around her makes me so nervous now the more I think about her. I messed up my chance to approach her in class, so I had messaged the and asked if she wanted to study together to which she said yes. Unfortunately she had caught a cold and our study date didn't happen but she suggested that we do something else to compensate and I offered to take her out to lunch instead to which she said that's fine. Now we're going to meet up after class Monday and talk about it and what we'd want to do. I'm nervous because we've never actually officially talked in person before and I'm freaking out since it'll be here before I know it. Help.

P.S. This is a continuation of my last post a while back. Have a nice day and God bless.

//www.christianforums.com/threads/how-do-i-approach-a-girl-im-interested-in.8131396/

Congratulations on getting a date secured with the lady you're interested in! Don't be worried, she obviously has some level of interest in you if she agreed to meet up with you...so that's going in your favour already. Also, you're in the same class, so it's quite possible you both share common interests. Just be true to yourself and be in the moment, don't try to think too far ahead. Prayer never hurts things either, ask God to help you with this situation and help your nerves :)
 
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