Crying in public...

[quatona]

Is it immoral?

I wouldn´t know why.

Seriously though, what do you make of people who cry in public or in the workplace, does it show weakness or does it just mean they aren't afraid to show their emotions?

It means that they are either not able or not willing to let their emotionality show.
It tends to make me uncomfortable since

a. I feel the (irrational) obligation to react or respond
b. whilst I can tell that the person in question is somehow emotionally touched, I don´t even know

• what it is that moves them
• whether the crying is the manifestation of a positive or negative emotion
• how strong the emotional involvement is
• whether the person would like her crying to be addressed.

IOW: People crying tends to give me a feeling of helplessness. I don´t know whether and how to respond.
I guess the problem is that crying very much looks like a conscious attempt at communication whilst actually it isn´t necessarily.

I personally find myself shedding a tear or two mostly over positively touching occurences, small things that I find particularly beautiful.

 

[fuzzymel]

Yes, words can't describe how happy I was to see that (allegedly) racist, xenophobic poor excuse for a human being miss his penalty and break down and cry like a baby He parks in disabled spaces y'know, because he's John Terry and can afford to pay the fines.

Lol but you missed the spitting! He spat at Tevez just before Drogba got sent off. Not to mention he started that surrounding the ref business.

Why anyone would feel sorry for him I will never know.

 

[sidhe]

I should mention that I never go see good romantic movies in public, 'cause I break down at the climax...so I go to horror films and such.

However, The Matrix took me by surprise. When Trinity got Neo to come back to life at the end via love, I bawled like a baby. Got strange, strange looks.

 

[stan1980]

Lol but you missed the spitting! He spat at Tevez just before Drogba got sent off. Not to mention he started that surrounding the ref business.

Why anyone would feel sorry for him I will never know.

Not to mention trying to grab the red card out of the refs hand earlier on in the season, urinating at nightclubs bars http://www.people.co.uk/tm_objectid...ideo-shame-back-to-haunt-terry-name_page.html and mocking american tourists in a hotel at heathrow the day after 9/11.

Not fit for England captaincy in my book. If there is any justice in the world, Rio will be made England captain, and hopefully John Terry spends the summer in tears.

Edit: Oh yeah, he called Tevez an Argie [wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth] too

 

[Eudaimonist]

However, The Matrix took me by surprise. When Trinity got Neo to come back to life at the end via love, I bawled like a baby. Got strange, strange looks.

I don't think I have actually "bawled" since I was a child, but my eyes have gotten teary from two sources:

Fellowship of the Ring: The two scenes are when Gandalf has just died and the Company is in shock at his loss, and especially when Frodo reaches down and rescues Sam from the river Anduin. That second scene gets me every time.

Sleeping in Light (the very last episode of the brilliant tv series Babylon 5): The scene where Sheridan and Delenn, long happily married, must part because Sheridan will soon, inevitably, die.


eudaimonia,

Mark

 

[sidhe]

I don't think I have actually "bawled" since I was a child, but my eyes have gotten teary from two sources:

Fellowship of the Ring: The two scenes are when Gandalf has just died and the Company is in shock at his loss, and especially when Frodo reaches down and rescues Sam from the river Anduin. That second scene gets me every time.

Sleeping in Light (the very last episode of the brilliant tv series Babylon 5): The scene where Sheridan and Delenn, long happily married, must part because Sheridan will soon, inevitably, die.


eudaimonia,

Mark

Oh, Gandalf's death tears me up. So does when Aragorn goes off the cliff. And when Sam pulls Frodo up from the ledge after nearly falling after Gollum.

 

[LittleNipper]

Is it immoral? Seriously though, what do you make of people who cry in public or in the workplace, does it show weakness or does it just mean they aren't afraid to show their emotions? I always feel a tad uncomfortable when I see someone crying over little things, and sometimes a little infuriating. Maybe I need to work at sympathy a little harder?

It is certainly not immoral to cry in public, unless it is all an act (making that outward display a lie).

 

[CCGirl]

I have depression and unwarrented crying jags. It just happens, in public or privately.

 

[stan1980]

A quick question for those who do cry in public. Could you, if you really wanted to or needed to, physically hold back the tears, or is it really uncontrollable?

 

[oneofthem]

It really depends. It's rarely comfortable to cry in public, i often feel as awkward as those around me, depending on the setting. It depends on what it's about and how i'm feeling affected.

 

[quatona]

A quick question for those who do cry in public. Could you, if you really wanted to or needed to, physically hold back the tears, or is it really uncontrollable?

I couldn´t.
Same goes for laughing out loud.
That´s why people rarely encounter me crying or laughing out loud. It only happens when and exactly because I can´t help it.

 

[stan1980]

It really depends. It's rarely comfortable to cry in public, i often feel as awkward as those around me, depending on the setting. It depends on what it's about and how i'm feeling affected.

I couldn´t.
Same goes for laughing out loud.
That´s why people rarely encounter me crying or laughing out loud. It only happens when and exactly because I can´t help it.

Ok, thanks, so it is uncontrollable at times. I didn't realise. There is a certain song that reminds me of sad times when I was a kid, which makes me emotional when I hear, but I dare say I could hold back the tears. I haven't cried uncontrollably for, well, I can't remember the last time, so I was probably wrong to assume everyone was the same.

 

[SallyNow]

A quick question for those who do cry in public. Could you, if you really wanted to or needed to, physically hold back the tears, or is it really uncontrollable?

A few times I've been struck with tears that just start to flow. It's when some really bad news has come by way. I usually can hold them back until I get to a washroom or other more private area.

However, I have been in debates in classes that are so emotional everyone has started to either raise their voice or shed a tear. Often the next day people will complain about how especially bad the ragweed was the previous day...

 

[quatona]

I haven't cried uncontrollably for, well, I can't remember the last time

Did you cry controllably or didn´t you cry at all?

 

[stan1980]

Did you cry controllably or didn´t you cry at all?

Well, if I'm on my own, I might cry (rarely), but if I had company then it's unlikely I would cry as I could hold back the tears. I don't think I've cried in front of anyone else since I was a child.

 

[quatona]

Well, if I'm on my own, I might cry (rarely), but if I had company then it's unlikely I would cry as I could hold back the tears. I don't think I've cried in front of anyone else since I was a child.

I see, thanks!
The reason I asked: You mentioned your initial doubts that crying in public is uncontrollable, but you have never had the personal experience of crying controllably in public, either.
I guess I can not really wrap my mind around the distinction "crying controllably vs. crying uncontrollably".

 

[stan1980]

I guess I can not really wrap my mind around the distinction "crying controllably vs. crying uncontrollably".

It's probably more accurate to say "letting the tears flow" versus "holding back the tears".

 

[Wormie]

Why would crying anywhere be immoral? Just because it makes SOME people feel a slight discomfort, doesn't mean it's wrong. Just means they should endeavour to increase their comfort zone.

 

[stan1980]

Why would crying anywhere be immoral? Just because it makes SOME people feel a slight discomfort, doesn't mean it's wrong. Just means they should endeavour to increase their comfort zone.

Okay, I was being slightly facetious when I asked if it was immoral.

 

[Mling]

I see, thanks!
The reason I asked: You mentioned your initial doubts that crying in public is uncontrollable, but you have never had the personal experience of crying controllably in public, either.
I guess I can not really wrap my mind around the distinction "crying controllably vs. crying uncontrollably".

I see crying controllably as something I am doing. When I cry uncontrollably, my self-identity fades to the background, the crying takes on a life of it's own and consumes me. I retain some awareness of my surroundings but it stops mattering to me.