Hi, I'm Scott and I would like to share some of the things that have been going on in my life in the past few months.
I used to be of the "friends first" philosophy, but now I'm of the "God first" philosophy. Here is why:
A few months ago I wrote down a five areas of my life that I wanted God to help me with, one of them was finding a wife. I assumed that because God made a wife for Adam He has also made a wife for me. I prayed to God for the qualities I would want in a wife, some according to the Bible, some were my personal preference(green eyes, red hair, hehe).
I talked with a few people about dating and the general consensus was that it led to unwanted baggage. Here is a scripture:
Proverbs 4:23 "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life."
This is the scripture I stared with. I call it a key scripture:
Psalm 37:4 "Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart."
I did just that, delighted myself in the Lord. I was talking with my Dad a week or two later about what I had written and he had some big news for me. A year and a half ago he contacted the father of a young lady named Jane who used to babysit my younger siblings. Though she had babysat for my little brothers and sisters many times, I had never met her. My dad proposed to Jane's father that she and I should meet and pursue marriage, if we wanted to, of course. The reason he did this - I had forgotten - was because when I was 11, we had a conversation about marriage and dating. I brought those topics up because I had a dream about a red haired girl on a hill that I was trying to run towards, but couldn't catch her. I told my dad that I would like him to find a wife for me or at least have a say in who I will marry. So, Jane's father wasn't sure about the whole plan and he let the matter rest. But, my dad had stayed in touch with him and recently the issue had been brought up again. Jane's father was having trouble with his boys and dating and he was convicted by the way my father and I were approaching the matter. Jane's father agreed to start the whole process rolling. My dad explained that it was like an arranged marriage, but Jane and I each had VETO power by which we could halt the entire process.
Jane and I each recieved a picture of the other person and began learning about each other through our parents. She sounded like such a match for me: among other things she enjoys camping, paintballing, skydiving, sings, can teach piano, and she's a true Christian.
Before I met her, I had dinner with her parents - at my request - because she already knew my dad and his wife. It was the right thing to do, because it gave her dad a chance to check me out and made all things equal. Everything went very well. The next morning Jane and I met and went for a hot-air balloon ride. She has red hair and green eyes! We had good conversation in spite of the fact that we were both pretty nervous. I'm nervous still, but getting more comfortable around her. Recently we had the chance to talk about what we are doing, what it's called and why we are doing it. It was reassuring to know that both her and I have never wanted to date, but are looking at this as a path to marriage.
She is exactly everything I prayed for and more. What a gift from God. I am so blessed. Our relationship is growing very quickly. I'm still very cautious about the whole physical aspect of it, so though we've seen each other 4 or 5 times the most we've done is a quick hug initiated by her. I want to honor my father and mother and want her to do the same. Right now I'm not sure how honored her father would feel if we were making out all the time.
Here is another neat little things God did:
I moved out of my parents house when I was 18, but through circumstances - none unfortunate - I ended up living with my father again when I was 20. I think this was God's will, so that I could be living according to scripture. Genesis 2:24 "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." Plus, my father and his wife have been a big help in this whole courting process. Obviously, this verse cannot be lived by everyone, so it's something that God works around.
I've been living by what feels right by God, without much scriptural knowledge. I am now reading the Bible more often and finding scripture as a confirmation to the way I've conducted myself. It is very encouraging.
This whole example isn't the ONLY way to do it. All that matters is that you are doing God's will and honoring Him by your actions and thoughts. God is the best match-maker and orchestraetor. Find His will and run with it.
