Counseling

[mariposa1127]

Is it allways necessary to go to a counselor? Dont you have to choose to let it go and not let it effect the rest of your life? What are the beneifits of going to counsling? I would think it would make you really upseat to go over what happend to you instead of making you better.

Honestly

What are the benefits of going to counseling? Should every person who has been abused as a child go to counseling?

 

[Johnnz]

We all need to insights and challenges of other people in our lives. Counseling is a more specialised kind of interpersonal relationship.

I have found that another person can often give valuable insights and help people see how the past still affects them in the present. People do respond differently to sexual abuse and getting it behind them, but the general principle of being in a community of people is applicable to us all anyway.

John
NZ

 

[Saucy]

going to a counselor will probably do what you just proposed...help you to get rid of the anger and bitterness that's inside. It seems as if you were asked to go to counseling about it and you seem bitter about it because you just don't want to talk about it. Well...believe it or not, talking things out WILL help. It will help you feel that you're not alone and that someone does care and it's so refreshing! They can actually help you to forgive and get past it rather than just bottle it all up inside! May God bless you in whatever you decide to do!

 

[TCat]

I think it depends on why someone is going to counseling. If it is because someone else is insisting then it probably would be less helpful. If it is because one thinks that their past may be affecting their present in relationships, work, self worth/esteem then yes it can be very helpful.
I started counseling because after years of being tough, strong, independant and having already "gotten over it" I fell into a terrible depression. I could not understand why, I had a good marriage, nice kid, good job etc. but I was so miserable. My counselor helped me see the many ways that my past sexual abuse as well as other parts of my past had affected me and helped me learn to change somethings and put into perspective other things so that I could move forward without all the baggage I had been unknowingly dragging behind.
Does counseling make one upset, sometimes, it hurts to explore the past at times, but it is also really healing to be able to acknowledge the truth, share with a caring non-judgemental, objective person what happened long ago. As Dr. Phil says, "we can't heal what we don't acknowledge."
As for every abuse survivor needing counseling, I don't know, it really helped me. I think maybe it depends on how the abuse was dealt with in the past. I know someone whose parents found out about it early on, faced the abuser and sought help for the child. He is doing well without counseling. Personally I kept my secret for 35 years and it nearly killed me, has damaged my relationships with my parents, my spouse etc.

I hope this helps, if you choose to seek counseling you need to remember that you are in charge, the counselor works for you and you set the pace and tone, they don't MAKE you reveal or discuss things that you are not ready to talk about.
God Bless you.

 

[BlessedMommy05]

I think it depends on the person weather or not counseling will help. I have to agree that it does help gain a perspective on what did happen and why or maybe not why.. I think it helps you grow as a person, yeah its tough to relive the past but if you say get new information on some thing it helps put the peices together as far as the pain.. Just my view..

 

[Gatorgal]

I do choose to let my past go, but sometimes it seems to creep back in. Counsling does help some people, and if that is the case I am all for it, but for myself, it was very uncomfortable for me. I went to a Christian counslor 3 times and then stopped going. I agreed with everything she said, but it was things I already knew.