Hi everybody. This is my first post here. I'm a stay at home mom with three kids, ages 4, 6 and 9. I graduated 13 years ago with a bachelor's degree in business. I'm thinking about going back to school for some kind of medical degree (nursing, etc). A downside to going back would be the money. We still owe tens of thousands of dollars on my husband's student loans and I don't want to add to his debt. I just don't see how a business degree could help me get a job where I could really make a difference in people's lives. I've been thinking about this since I quit my job ten years ago to be home full time. I've prayed constantly about this. I do feel like God is telling me to wait. The time is coming, however, since my youngest will be starting kindergarten in the fall. It's hard not to look at other mom's lives, and think I did it wrong. I love being able to be home with my kids, but I feel like I shot myself in the foot by not having some kind of career. I know I can't have both, but now that the time is up for my kids to be home during the day, I'm scared about the future.
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Confused about my future
- Thread starter deevums
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CounselorForChrist
Senior Veteran
If you want the honest truth, your a mother and its a job. It may not pay like a job, but none the less it is a job. And really its a harder job then most men realize. To be a mother means you give up lots of things in because your kids are more important. My mother gave up a VERY well paying job to have me. At first she thought about working a bit but as I grew up she realized being a stay at home mom was the best job ever. Now that I am older she works again.
Its ashame the world often makes mothers feel like they aren't contributing. Never let the world tell you otherwise when it comes to raising kids. I respect any parent that gives up a career to work at home! Its admirable!
I say this as someone who is disabled and going to be a stay at home dad while my soon to be wife works! As for the going back to work and money. Debt is very common now. We had to file bankruptcy years ago just from medical bills alone.
Just keep praying about it your situation. If God has a job lined up for you, it will come in his perfect timing! You never know, maybe he has a at home job that involes kids, alot of mothers are doing that now! God is good like that! I'll keep you in my prayers!
Its ashame the world often makes mothers feel like they aren't contributing. Never let the world tell you otherwise when it comes to raising kids. I respect any parent that gives up a career to work at home! Its admirable!
I say this as someone who is disabled and going to be a stay at home dad while my soon to be wife works! As for the going back to work and money. Debt is very common now. We had to file bankruptcy years ago just from medical bills alone. Just keep praying about it your situation. If God has a job lined up for you, it will come in his perfect timing! You never know, maybe he has a at home job that involes kids, alot of mothers are doing that now! God is good like that! I'll keep you in my prayers!
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seeingeyes
Newbie
Hmm... Since you already have that business degree, perhaps you could use what you know to start your own business. Perhaps a non-profit of some kind?
There is a lot of good that you can do for folks without putting scrubs on. What are your options?
There is a lot of good that you can do for folks without putting scrubs on. What are your options?
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Thanks guys. Your replies mean SO much to me, I can't tell you. They almost bring tears to my eyes. I have a wonderful extended family, but I don't really have any close friends because I don't really let anyone get close to me. So having this advice is huge.
I don't feel like starting a business is something that appeals to me. My dad did, and he was great at it, but I don't have that entrepreneurial spirit. Besides, I'd have no idea what kind of business to start. I know I have a lot to offer, I'm very caring and organized. I don't really know what's out there for me and I know I should start looking soon. One other point, which may not even matter but is always in the back of my mind, is that 15 years ago I was convicted of a misdemeanor for stealing money from my job at the time. It's on my permanent record. I'm a totally different person now, and I know everyone makes mistakes, but I'm just worried as to how that would affect my chances of getting a job that would be fulfilling. I know, I really have to put that in God's hands.
I don't feel like starting a business is something that appeals to me. My dad did, and he was great at it, but I don't have that entrepreneurial spirit. Besides, I'd have no idea what kind of business to start. I know I have a lot to offer, I'm very caring and organized. I don't really know what's out there for me and I know I should start looking soon. One other point, which may not even matter but is always in the back of my mind, is that 15 years ago I was convicted of a misdemeanor for stealing money from my job at the time. It's on my permanent record. I'm a totally different person now, and I know everyone makes mistakes, but I'm just worried as to how that would affect my chances of getting a job that would be fulfilling. I know, I really have to put that in God's hands.
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BFine
Seed Planter
*The best way to handle the misdemeanor is to be honest about it with your future employer. Don't hide it.
Rebuilding after your "fall"--
Work on building your good reputation in the community-- This will
show a future employer you have changed and became a contributing/responsible woman who is trustworthy etc.
Get acquainted with people who are in good standing in the community/and or church. Having people or someone who can vouch for your character is a plus.
You are a different person... your testimony, use it to help
others make good choices.
Hiding, sitting back will only keep you sidelined...and afraid.
Get connected with a life-coach or mentor who can help you
ease back into the business world.
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SavingCady
Be still and know that I am God.
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First off, I'd just like to say that...if you go back to school, it is not adding to "his debt," it is BOTH of yours debt now that you are married. One of the pluses to getting married, everything is now yours
In Corinthians, I believe, I'm not sure what verse...we are called to run "the race of life" like you want to be in first place and not last. But everyone is called to run THEIR OWN RACE. You need to stop looking at all the other mother's lives for one simple reason: their life is their own, your life is yours. Just because you have done things DIFFERENTLY than other mothers, does NOT mean you have done anything wrong, hon!
"I feel like I shot myself in the foot by not having some kind of career. I know I can't have both..." Aù contrare....you can be a mother and have a career. Who says you cannot? No one, unless you know that God is telling you that you are ONLY being called to be a mother. When you say God is telling you to WAIT, I take that to mean He just means the time is not right.
Just keep praying
In Corinthians, I believe, I'm not sure what verse...we are called to run "the race of life" like you want to be in first place and not last. But everyone is called to run THEIR OWN RACE. You need to stop looking at all the other mother's lives for one simple reason: their life is their own, your life is yours. Just because you have done things DIFFERENTLY than other mothers, does NOT mean you have done anything wrong, hon!
"I feel like I shot myself in the foot by not having some kind of career. I know I can't have both..." Aù contrare....you can be a mother and have a career. Who says you cannot? No one, unless you know that God is telling you that you are ONLY being called to be a mother. When you say God is telling you to WAIT, I take that to mean He just means the time is not right.
Just keep praying
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BFine
Seed Planter
Another thing or two....
Your business degree can help to make a big difference in the lives of others...
the money you make could go to help support a missionary family, support
a child who lives in a third world country, support a charity-- you could
even mentor another woman in business matters etc.
Use that education--after all you put forth the time and effort to go to school,
study, take exams and graduate.
.
Your business degree can help to make a big difference in the lives of others...
the money you make could go to help support a missionary family, support
a child who lives in a third world country, support a charity-- you could
even mentor another woman in business matters etc.
Use that education--after all you put forth the time and effort to go to school,
study, take exams and graduate.
.
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Your post immediately brings a song to mind. I can't embed a video yet, but I hope you look it up. It's called "Do Everything" by Steven Curtis Chapman. I think it'll lift your spirits.
I have a business degree and I work for a non-profit agency. Most of our employees are working hands-on to keep families together, but they wouldn't be able to do it without my department's support.
Before I worked here I was a for-profit sales consultant, and I LOVED that job. It was right where God put me. Even though I wasn't on the front lines saving lives, I was still helping people make an important decision. Through your attitude, you spread the Good News. Because the beautiful thing how He made us is that we aren't all called to be priests and Sunday school teachers and nurses; we need plumbers and manufacturers. We need roofers and office managers. And we need strong business professionals in all industries.
If you want a new career, that's fine, but don't feel guilty about your qualifications. You can help people no matter what your degree is.
I have a business degree and I work for a non-profit agency. Most of our employees are working hands-on to keep families together, but they wouldn't be able to do it without my department's support.
Before I worked here I was a for-profit sales consultant, and I LOVED that job. It was right where God put me. Even though I wasn't on the front lines saving lives, I was still helping people make an important decision. Through your attitude, you spread the Good News. Because the beautiful thing how He made us is that we aren't all called to be priests and Sunday school teachers and nurses; we need plumbers and manufacturers. We need roofers and office managers. And we need strong business professionals in all industries.
If you want a new career, that's fine, but don't feel guilty about your qualifications. You can help people no matter what your degree is.
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Yahweh needs believers in every field. Having a business degree wouldn't hinder you from helping others, just continue to be His light wherever you are. With a medical degree, you would be facing the same problem about the previous mistake - as already stated just be honest about it. When the youngest begins school, there will be lots of opportunities to help others including in businesses. Someone else could be praying and asking Yahweh for an employee who is dedicated to Him and who would work well within their office.
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Dear Beloved
I know how you feel about your future and thats why God gave us different gifts to be of help to one another in difficult times and the bible confirms this in Ephesians 4:11-16 And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers
For the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ;
That we should no longer be children, tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in the cunning craftiness of deceitful plotting
But, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head—Christ— from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love
If you or any on this forum needs my prophetic assistance for free, please pm me now
God Bless You
GODPROPHET
(YOUR HUMBLE PROPHET)
I know how you feel about your future and thats why God gave us different gifts to be of help to one another in difficult times and the bible confirms this in Ephesians 4:11-16 And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers
For the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ;
That we should no longer be children, tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in the cunning craftiness of deceitful plotting
But, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head—Christ— from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love
If you or any on this forum needs my prophetic assistance for free, please pm me now
God Bless You
GODPROPHET
(YOUR HUMBLE PROPHET)
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gideon123
Humble Servant of God
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Lots of people are struggling to make ends meet.
If you did get a job - you would feel guilty every day about not being with your kids. There are no easy answers for Moms. My wife cried many mornings when she went to work, and our kids were headed off to daycare. But actually - both of them have worked out really well. But if you get the chance to spend that time with them ... don't knock it.
Look at part-time jobs.
I recommend against more student loans, unless the employment is a GUARANTEED shoe-in. These loans are huge debt-bubble in the USA, and the whole dam is going to burst soon. If possible, avoid debt.
best wishes,
Gideon123
If you did get a job - you would feel guilty every day about not being with your kids. There are no easy answers for Moms. My wife cried many mornings when she went to work, and our kids were headed off to daycare. But actually - both of them have worked out really well. But if you get the chance to spend that time with them ... don't knock it.
Look at part-time jobs.
I recommend against more student loans, unless the employment is a GUARANTEED shoe-in. These loans are huge debt-bubble in the USA, and the whole dam is going to burst soon. If possible, avoid debt.
best wishes,
Gideon123
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