Confession

[ALoveDivine]

Alright so at first I was really thankful for the Sacrament of reconciliation, and I know the grace and healing it gives us. But you know, the standard of life is so high, I find myself failing frequently. Whether its masturbation, sex with my gf, or hitting a joint with my coworkers after my shift, or whatever, it seems I am very frequently slipping up under pressure. So I seem to be in constant need of confession.

I'm at the point where I loath going. I wish I could just confess to God and be guilt-free, like I felt I was as a protestant. Having to tell another person, over and over again on a regular basis, of my sins is taking its toll. I hate doing it. Every time I go I intend to give up the sins, but they always come back into my life. I always end up falling again. I can't stand having to go to confession every single week of my life because the standard is so darn high. Every enjoyable and tempting sin is a mortal sin it seems.

How do I get over this? I don't want to fall into scrupulosity, but I don't want to make light of moral truth either. I hate being out of the grace of God, but it seems I fall away from that grace every single time after only a couple days. I can't seem to find ANY lasting victory at all. What can I possibly do to get beyond all of this?

 

[thecolorsblend]

Nobody is perfect. The purposes of Reconciliation are to help you grow and address your problems, not guilt-trip you into oblivion. Keep at it. The people on this forum may or may not say so out loud but we're all struggling with stuff that we have to take into Confession. It happens.

All the same, I'll pray for you.

 

[Michie]

I can relate. While I find the practice somewhat helpful it does turn into a cycle that can turn to dread. Especially if you feel you are just rattling off the same things and that's that. Keep up the effort of going though.

Alright so at first I was really thankful for the Sacrament of reconciliation, and I know the grace and healing it gives us. But you know, the standard of life is so high, I find myself failing frequently. Whether its masturbation, sex with my gf, or hitting a joint with my coworkers after my shift, or whatever, it seems I am very frequently slipping up under pressure. So I seem to be in constant need of confession.

I'm at the point where I loath going. I wish I could just confess to God and be guilt-free, like I felt I was as a protestant. Having to tell another person, over and over again on a regular basis, of my sins is taking its toll. I hate doing it. Every time I go I intend to give up the sins, but they always come back into my life. I always end up falling again. I can't stand having to go to confession every single week of my life because the standard is so darn high. Every enjoyable and tempting sin is a mortal sin it seems.

How do I get over this? I don't want to fall into scrupulosity, but I don't want to make light of moral truth either. I hate being out of the grace of God, but it seems I fall away from that grace every single time after only a couple days. I can't seem to find ANY lasting victory at all. What can I possibly do to get beyond all of this?

 

[Rhamiel]

not to be dismissive

but I doubt that having the occasional joint is a mortal sin

for something to be a mortal sin it has to be a serious matter

 

[Michie]

My priest considered such things a serious matter. Mostly because people are killed trafficking it, etc.

 

[stray bullet]

Whether its masturbation,

You don't necessarily have to go to confession for that.

sex with my gf,

Yeah... I'd avoid that except on rare circumstances because you can end up putting yourself into a situation that could get bad.

[qupte]or hitting a joint with my coworkers after my shift,[/quote]

That's not a sin.

How do I get over this? I don't want to fall into scrupulosity, but I don't want to make light of moral truth either. I hate being out of the grace of God, but it seems I fall away from that grace every single time after only a couple days. I can't seem to find ANY lasting victory at all. What can I possibly do to get beyond all of this?

You should talk to your priest about it, Confession was originally intended to be EXTREMELY rare.
Monks made a "habit" (hahahaha) out of it and frequent confession has become the norm.

 

[Rhamiel]

Yeah... I'd avoid that except on rare circumstances because you can end up putting yourself into a situation that could get bad.

yeah.....
like eternal damnation

 

[Tallguy88]

My priest considered such things a serious matter. Mostly because people are killed trafficking it, etc.

You could grow it yourself, but the lawman don't like that.

Seriously, if it were legalized, it would destroy the cartels because they would lose their main source of revenue. But the feds are too puritanical to see the obvious truth of the situation.

 

[Tallguy88]

not to be dismissive

but I doubt that having the occasional joint is a mortal sin

for something to be a mortal sin it has to be a serious matter

Yeah, I agree. Like Michie said, buying it might be a sin, but pretty far removed from direct cooperation it might only be venial. We should ask David to explain it. Hes good at explaining that stuff.

@Davidnic

 

[pdudgeon]

Alright so at first I was really thankful for the Sacrament of reconciliation, and I know the grace and healing it gives us. But you know, the standard of life is so high, I find myself failing frequently. Whether its masturbation, sex with my gf, or hitting a joint with my coworkers after my shift, or whatever, it seems I am very frequently slipping up under pressure. So I seem to be in constant need of confession.

I'm at the point where I loath going. I wish I could just confess to God and be guilt-free, like I felt I was as a protestant. Having to tell another person, over and over again on a regular basis, of my sins is taking its toll. I hate doing it. Every time I go I intend to give up the sins, but they always come back into my life. I always end up falling again. I can't stand having to go to confession every single week of my life because the standard is so darn high. Every enjoyable and tempting sin is a mortal sin it seems.

How do I get over this? I don't want to fall into scrupulosity, but I don't want to make light of moral truth either. I hate being out of the grace of God, but it seems I fall away from that grace every single time after only a couple days. I can't seem to find ANY lasting victory at all. What can I possibly do to get beyond all of this?

ok, i'll bite. (though it will not be the popular answer.)
there are only 3 things to do in this case:
1. change the behavior that leads to the sin,
2. change the conditions in which you find yourself, or
3. change your thinking and make different choices.

if slipping up under pressure is the problem, then find a way to remove that temptation.
realize that we always have a choice in these matters,
and choosing to just go along out of habit is still a choice.

If you want to go out after work, then do so, but choose a different crowd to go with, or a different activity.
go to a gym and shoot hoops, or swim laps. if you're inside all day, then get outside and jog.
doing those things will help to keep you guilt free, AND it will help you to develop a new pattern for that part of your life.

just start with one of those temptations you listed above, and work on that one.
make a committment to yourself to try the change for 5 days, no matter what.

(the secret is that after 5 days it gets easier, but before that it will be hard to follow through.
that's why it's good to make the committment from the beginning.)

remember that you're making this change for yourself because you're important.
Choosing to take charge of your life now will change the outcome of your life,
and really make an important difference in the end.

 

[MoonlessNight]

You could grow it yourself, but the lawman don't like that.

Seriously, if it were legalized, it would destroy the cartels because they would lose their main source of revenue. But the feds are too puritanical to see the obvious truth of the situation.

I don't want to derail the thread, but I do think that I need to comment on this since I see this claim passed around quite a bit but I haven't seen it documented very well. I can find data myself, but they seem to conflict. In particular some sources say that marijuana and cannibis constitute "the majority" of the income for cartels, while others state that methamphetamines are a larger source of income. And there are some reports that the major sources of income for cartels aren't even drugs. I imagine that a big part of the confusion comes from the fact that "cartels" are not a monolithic entity but rather several largely independent groups. It may be that one cartel mainly does business with marijuana, while another focuses on meth and another on other illegal activities (such as illegal logging). We should also consider that cartels can find new sources of income when one does not perform as desired so that legalization might end up merely shifting the focus of production from marijuana to harder drugs like meth rather than destroying the cartels in the long term.

But I suppose in the context of the thread, the less it is clear that marijuana is essential to the operations of cartels, the less severe of a matter it would be to obtain it.

 

[Michie]

Who wants to lose their property over weed? Not me. I think it should be legalized. Anybody with an ounce of common sense can see that.

You could grow it yourself, but the lawman don't like that.

Seriously, if it were legalized, it would destroy the cartels because they would lose their main source of revenue. But the feds are too puritanical to see the obvious truth of the situation.

 

[thecolorsblend]

It needs to be decriminalized. Mandatory recovery programs and counseling should be the remedies. People shouldn't get sent to a federal PMITA prison for possession or partaking. But it's hardly behavior that should be completely tolerated.

 

[Tallguy88]

Who wants to lose their property over weed? Not me. I think it should be legalized. Anybody with an ounce of common sense can see that.

I agree, not worth the risk at this time. But your priests concern can be alleviated if you buy directly from a grower. Like a buddy or something.

I'm not actually advocating you do that, just thinking of ways around what your priest (legitimately) is concerned about.

To the OP: sorry for the derail. I honestly don't believe moderate Marijuana use is a mortal sin on its own. There are other factors like Michie mentioned that could possibly make it mortal.

As to your other issues, I agree. It does make going to Mass and Confession a dreadful experience if you have to go to Confession every single time. But they say it's what your supposed to do, so I can't tell you otherwise.

 

[Tallguy88]

It needs to be decriminalized. Mandatory recovery programs and counseling should be the remedies. People shouldn't get sent to a federal PMITA prison for possession or partaking. But it's hardly behavior that should be completely tolerated.

It at least needs to be legalized for medical use. A lot of people I know who use, do so for medical reasons. I have three friends who are exceedingly hyper. Like, it drives me crazy to be around them for any length of time because they will not SHUT UP. Doesn't matter what we are talking about, they are loud and chatty. I'm pretty sure their MJ use is a form of self-medication.

 

[ALoveDivine]

I see we got off on a tangent, which is fine, I'm in agreement that marijuana should not be illegal. In fact, I live in Detroit, and its decriminalized here. So I don't even know if it's use can be considered sinful or not, which is I think the more interesting question.

Another question, what sins must I go through the sacrament for? None of these sins have been committed with "full consent" in the sense of me deliberately going out of my way to do them. Its more force of habit and moments of weakness. Is masturbation or marijuana use in such cases "mortal" sin? Or can I just confess them directly to God and be done with it?

 

[Michie]

I'm not a big fan of smoking. I know some who are. I'd rather drink a glass of grapes/wine.

One thing I noticed about MJ is that it gives a bit of a hang over. I do not know if anyone has ever brought it up but smoking the stuff is not free of side effects.

I agree, not worth the risk at this time. But your priests concern can be alleviated if you buy directly from a grower. Like a buddy or something.

I'm not actually advocating you do that, just thinking of ways around what your priest (legitimately) is concerned about.

To the OP: sorry for the derail. I honestly don't believe moderate Marijuana use is a mortal sin on its own. There are other factors like Michie mentioned that could possibly make it mortal.

As to your other issues, I agree. It does make going to Mass and Confession a dreadful experience if you have to go to Confession every single time. But they say it's what your supposed to do, so I can't tell you otherwise.

 

[Davidnic]

Yeah, I agree. Like Michie said, buying it might be a sin, but pretty far removed from direct cooperation it might only be venial. We should ask David to explain it. Hes good at explaining that stuff.

@Davidnic

Lets set aside for a moment breaking a law and the connection to sin as far as disobedience to authority. Let's just look at the act. I have seen people argue for moral or venial on the use of marijuana.

You are not in direct material cooperation so it is not the same as those in cartels and such. The issue that divides mortal from venial is abuse. If you abuse or overuse any drug that can damage the body to the point where you are desecrating your body you are verging into mortal sin. Most people who look at such things would not look at occasional use as a mortal sin. It is breaking the law so it is a venial sin as long as it is illegal.

An argument might look this way (figuring in the law as well):

Objective act
Occasionally Smoking Marijuana (Neutral act)

Circumstance
It is against positive law. And we must obey proper legal authority. (Sinful act)

Some can argue you are supporting a large sinful industry by cooperation. This is a stronger argument with other drugs but it is worth noting. You are not in direct cooperation but you are contributing. But no so much that you are in formal cooperation. Now, if the circumstance becomes a frequency that leads to more money in that direction as well as damage to your own body you move to mortally sinful. Other issues of damage at a "recreational" level are (according to some) the same as smoking or alcohol. But excessive use of these can be a question as well. So the sinful nature of the act comes from the opposition to legitimate authority who has the right to make laws as long as they do not oppose natural law. And the damage done willfully to your body if abused. It is this later that can drive it toward a mortal sin.

Intention
To get high (Basically neutral but you are willing to break the law to do it so pushed more toward sinful. Essentially you are willing to break the law for pleasure. That is an issue.)

So in short...many would argue occasional use is a venial sin. Abuse is a mortal. Medicinal use is not sinful.

 

[ALoveDivine]

What if its decriminalized, like it is here in Detroit?

 

[Sumwear]

You could grow it yourself, but the lawman don't like that.

Seriously, if it were legalized, it would destroy the cartels because they would lose their main source of revenue. But the feds are too puritanical to see the obvious truth of the situation.

Too bad the cartels dabble in multiple things.

http://foreignpolicy.com/2013/12/04/think-again-mexican-drug-cartels/

I ask you this, did the end of prohibition kill off the mafia?