Confession help...

[LoveIsGod]

Hello everyone,
I'm a newly converted Catholic with a deep yearning to attend confession, however-- as with most things in this religion-- I find myself rather frightened by the formality of the process.
Basically, I'm just wondering if someone could walk me through a typical confession in the Catholic Church.

Thanks in advance!
Josh

 

[Metanoia02]

Hello everyone,
I'm a newly converted Catholic with a deep yearning to attend confession, however-- as with most things in this religion-- I find myself rather frightened by the formality of the process.
Basically, I'm just wondering if someone could walk me through a typical confession in the Catholic Church.

Thanks in advance!
Josh

Josh
Welcome to OBOB!

First of all there is nothing to be afraid of! Second don;t worry about the formality of the process, that's not where the grace comes from.

I am sure someone will post a link to a good guide to confession, there are many available.

The basic steps are the Priest will greet you, he will make the sign of the cross and you will do it also.

Then you begin "Bless me Father for I have sinned....." Since you are a new convert mention that at this time and then tell him how long it has been since your last confession. Then start with the sins you want to confess. He may ask a clarifying question on what sins you are confessing. He will probably give you some suggestion on how you might avoid these sins in the future. He will assign you a penance. He will then pray over you for absolution. Then you will make an act of contrition. The your done

The only parts you will have to remember are your sins. Also making the act of contrition is the part where you can recite a formal Act of Contrition or it can come from the heart. I prefer to just let it come from my heart. It basically comes out in four part.

Ask God for forgiveness
Be truly sorry for those sins
Resolve to try and avoid them in the future
Ask for the grace to accomplish that.

When these things come from your heart they truly magnify the grace that you will be receiving in the Sacrament.

BTW, I am a convert as well. I felt the same way. But believe me when you enter the confessional or reconciliation room your fear will vanish. God's grace will take over. God wants a good confession more then you do and he gives you the grace to do it.

Try to make it a regular thing. Outside of the Eucharist, this will benefit your spiritual growth more then anything.

Peace

 

[Metanoia02]

sorry double post.

 

[NDIrish]

Here's a suggestion that I find helps me. Take notes before hand on your sins...jot them down in a note pad, and bring it to confession with you.

 

[KennySe]

Hello, Josh. Welcome to ChristianForums, and to OBOB The One Bread, One Body Catholic Discussions board.

There are plenty of good threads to read here, which give detailed information on the Catholic Church and Her teachings. I urge you to rummage around OBOB's past pages.
See the stickey posts at the top of the page.
Enter the peaceful environment of The Chapel subforum, and pray with us if you want to.

But getting back to your topic of COnfession...

I recommend you read this very short thread which was posted recently here in OBOB.
http://www.christianforums.com/t86561

And then this short update by Mulutka.
http://www.christianforums.com/t87583

Above all, Josh, may the peace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you.

Welcome!

 

[Aaron-Aggie]

Here a good guide to print out to take with you if you need it: http://www.kofc.org/rc/en/publications/cis/devotional/GuideToConfession2075.pdf

 

[geocajun]

Here's a suggestion that I find helps me. Take notes before hand on your sins...jot them down in a note pad, and bring it to confession with you.

very sound advice. I do that and it helps me quite a bit.

 

[Cat59]

Hi Josh!
I still find confession difficult, but the sense of peace I experience after it makes the feelings I have before quite trivial
The priest will also help you with the "formality" of it and guide you through it

 

[Wolseley]

One very important thing to remember that may help you:

There is nothing wrong with telling the priest that you're new, you're scared, you're nervous, or you're uncomfortable. In fact, it's probably better that you do, because he will be able to better help you through the confession that way. There is nothing wrong with saying, "Father, I'm not sure what I need to do, please help me."

I think you will find that the priest will be very understanding, very kind, and very gentle in helping you through your confession.

 

[Mulutka]

Hi Josh!

First of all, I'm glad to hear that you've converted to Catholicism; I, too, have just recently come back to it!

I was going to post links to my recent threads on Reconciliation (and my struggles with it) but KennySe beat me to it. Please read them and take comfort that you're not the only one struggling with Confession and being "frightened by the formality of the process." I have to admit to you, I'm still frightened about how my next Confession will go (I'm going to try to go every Saturday since I can't get over how joyful and 'clean' I felt inside the last time I went).

Although I already talked about my experience with Reconciliation in the link KennySe gave, I'd like to expand on it. Hopefully you'll take some comfort from some of my words (and ease your fears)....

When I went to Confession last Saturday I really had tried to remember the 'steps' it involved... I tried to memorize what I was supposed to say, think really hard about all my outward and inward sins... I tried to keep calm by taking deep breaths and exhailing slowly... but when I got into the room with the priest I started to panic inside. The only thing that keep me going was the fact that I forced myself to close the door (therefore there was no option of me escaping!!) and I also really wanted to receive the Euchrist--> but I couldn't do this unless I was absolved of my sins (which I had 13 years worth of)!

I forced myself to sit face-to-face because I really wanted to connect with the priest... I wanted to fully expose myself and my sin. Also, by doing this he was able to comfort me. He held my hand in the end and there was such a great connection/union. I have to tell you though, I didn't follow ANY of the formality. NONE OF IT!!! I just couldn't. Honestly! I started saying, "Bless me Father.." but that's all I could do. I didn't even do the sign of the Cross because my body felt paralyized.I've never cried sooooo much before. But my tears really were me coming to terms with the pride of sin (how I've downplayed my sins) and the full extent of what the Blood of Christ really means (grace).

I had said in a previous thread that I prefered to confess my sins infront of God alone (not to a priest). The truth behind this statement is that I just didn't want to really admit what I've done... I didn't want anyone else to know because I felt so ashamed and guilt ridden. Whenever I confessed my sins on my own I always allowed myself to continue to feel different levels of guilt afterwards.... this is hard to explain though.

After I confessed my sins to the priest I felt completly different. This feeling is something that's hard for me to put in words. It's like God erased my sins from my mind. In the past when I would think about how horrible of a sinner I've been (usually brought on by Satan trying to get me into a guilt trip) I would get a burning sensation in my heart and in my gut. This 'burning' was a sense of doom (for the lack of a better word). But after confessing to the priest I don't have this feeling anymore. It's like I've started a completly new chapter in my life (as cheesy as that sounds). Also, I really do think that by going to Confession, I completly cut off all 'ties' Satan had with me. What I mean here is, although I know that I was saved before and also have the assurance of God's forgiveness, I continually gave Satan legal grounds to hold me back.... I would ask for forgiveness from God but then I would let Satan make me feel guilty. I would let him make me think that I wasn't really fully forgiven.. and so I would try to 'prove myself' to God (make myself good). But that's impossible!!! I can't prove anything to God because I am destined to fail when I try things on my own. My 'way of doing things' only brings me heartache. Simply put, I was trying to give God dirty rags (the age old cliche).

Sorry I've talked so much... I hope that some of my words will help you though. I hope I have stressed enough how important Confession is (getting that 'clean' feeling) and also eased some of your fears.

Please feel free to pm me if you'd like!

 

[LoveIsGod]

Aaron-Aggie, the linked guide you provided is definitely an invaluable resource; thanks a lot!
Additionally, thanks for the incredibly speedy and especially thorough post, Metanoia02.
And everyone else, thanks for the information and kind words!

One more question before (hopefully!) Confession on Saturday. Is there any required precursor(s) to going to confession within the Catholic Church?

You guys are terrific help!
Josh

 

[geocajun]

One more question before (hopefully!) Confession on Saturday. Is there any required precursor(s) to going to confession within the Catholic Church?

it helps to have a sin or two to confess

Other than that, so long as your baptized your good to go.

 

[Aaron-Aggie]

Aaron-Aggie, the linked guide you provided is definitely an invaluable resource; thanks a lot!
Additionally, thanks for the incredibly speedy and especially thorough post, Metanoia02.
And everyone else, thanks for the information and kind words!

One more question before (hopefully!) Confession on Saturday. Is there any required precursor(s) to going to confession within the Catholic Church?

You guys are terrific help!
Josh

Baptisim and a understanding of the sacerment.

If your still in process of converting, your first confession will be part of the process so talk to a priest before just going one saturday. If you have already gone through rcia and been confirmed the only precursor is sin which sadly is an easy one to meet.

 

[LoveIsGod]

One more question: do Catholics believe that they're confessing to God, or to the priest? In other words, would a person in confession say, "I continue to neglect You and Your laws," or, "I continue to neglect Him and His laws?"

Mulutka, thanks for your beautiful post! I can definitely see a very similar situation happening to me when I get into the booth...

Josh

 

[KC Catholic]

One more question: do Catholics believe that they're confessing to God, or to the priest? In other words, would a person in confession say, "I continue to neglect You and Your laws," or, "I continue to neglect Him and His laws?"

Hello Josh -

We believe we are confessing directly to Christ - the Priest is there as a representative of the Church, because when we sin we break the communion with God as well as our Church. I usually refer to Christ in the 3rd person because the Priest is hearing your confession and through the words of absolution forgives you of your sins (Christ working through the words).

I hope this helps.

 

[LoveIsGod]

It definitely helps; thanks alot!