Compromise

[~Beauty_from_Pain~]

How do you come to a compromise on something with your husband/partner that you both completly disagree on? If to give up your stand would be to cause you great grief and pain, but for them to not get something it causes them to feel nearly the same way?

 

[AutumnDreamer]

This may not be the popular answer LOL But when DH and I disagree on something, I give him my reasons why and if he still disagrees, I submit to his decision and trust God that either Dh is right, or if he isn't that God will take care of us and Honor me for obeying His (meaning God's)word.

 

[invisiblebabe]

It depends what exactly the issue is.

 

[YouthPastor]

This may not be the popular answer LOL But when DH and I disagree on something, I give him my reasons why and if he still disagrees, I submit to his decision and trust God that either Dh is right, or if he isn't that God will take care of us and Honor me for obeying His (meaning God's)word.

Agreed - you have just described submission.

 

[YouthPastor]

She said husband/partner - so I just assumed husband.

You are right - if they are not married she does not have to submit - but if they feel they are right for each other - it would be a good thing to start getting used to

 

[loved]

They aren't married. She isn't called to submit to him... yet...


~ ~

I think she was talking hypothetically

 

[YouthPastor]

Don't get me wrong, becfause I *do* agree, YouthPastor.

The problem is, she has about a hundred threads (I'm not sure this is even an exageration on my part) out there outlining all the many problems that her and her boyfriend have, and it sticks out to me as one of those times when a woman really needs to decide *if* she can submit to this man for the rest of their lives.

"Feeling" you are right for each other is deceptive. The heart is deceptive. We'd like to believe that "love is all we need", but its simply not true. Actually, God is all we need Starling has a lot of things to reconcile with God first before we can be in a healthy *relationship* let alone a healthy marriage.

You cannot submit to a man until you are able to submit to God's Will and God's Word, thats for sure. Our feelings are deceptive. I "felt" that a lot of people were "right" for me over the years, but it doesn't always make it true because our emotions lie to us. They cover things up that we do not see until we push those emotions aside and uncover the truth.

As a result, its not a surprise to me that she's asking this question, you know? Because two people who are truly compatible can make the compromises on the little things, and do NOT have to compromise on the truly huge things because they already share those thigns (like faith, for instance, and morals)

~ ~

I figured that you obviously knew more about the situation/her - than I did

 

[~Nikki~]

Once we've both given our opinions, and we've truly listened to each other and have understood each others' feelings on the subject, if my husband and I *still* disagree, then I'll do things his way. The Bible says I have to submit to him. Also, I know that I know that I know, he will have considered my feelings and needs in making a decision and won't just do his own thing, but will do what he feels is best for both of us...

And however things eventually turn out, I know I've done the right thing, because the Bible doesn't tell me to fight to the death for my own cause, but to submit myself to my husband.

God bless...

 

[Inperfected]

So what is the issue that could be a problem if you two get married starling?