Co-Sleeping

[Linnis]

DS ended up co-sleeping because I fell asleep before he was done eating, he woke me up an hour later because he wanted back in his bed.

I think different couples choose and do different things to invest in their relationship. What works for one, may not work for another. Since DS is in our room, we hang out after he goes to bed, in the living room, have dinner, watch movies or TV, talk or we read our own books etc.

The whole house is ours to relax in, spend time in, be alone in.

 

[AutumnDreamer]

Point three is not in reference to sex, I actually happen to belive that it's important for my husband and I to have a space that it just for us to spend time together and also a place we can spend time apart.
Our room is just that Our's, it was in reference to personal space. a place where either of us can go to get away from all the stress's of life.

I'm constantly amazed by the amount of parents i meet who don't set time aside for each other or set aside time for themselves.

It's people like that who end up divorcing once their kids leave home simply because they haven't invested into there marriage.

For us, even when our daughter was 4 and sleeping with us, it was still our room, we decorated it the way we wanted, her toys were in the living room or in the bedroom with her sister. She just simply slept in there with us, she took naps in there in which case I was in the living room, cleaning, reading sewing etc. At night we put her to bed and Dh and I would cuddle on the couch and watch TV, or we got a babysitter (usually nan and grandad) and went out. I am a FIRM believer that the marriage comes first, but in our house the basic needs of each individual person come first, meaning if I have had a bad day and need a break, then Dh takes the kids and keeps them busy while I get some me time, if one of the kids is sick, then they come first, menaing dinner might be a little later unless daddy feels like cooking. If daddy wanted to get away in the bedroom for some alone time (being a minister he often needs that to study or pray or whatever) then I keep the kids out. If I need some alone time to sew (my sewing is now in our bedroom) then he keeps the kids out. We are never in there alone together except to sleep or if the kids aren't home, b/c if we were both in the bedroom getting alone time then who would be watching the kids? KWIM? I am not sure I understand what you mean by needing your own room unless you were talking about sex, could you give me an example?

 

[Beth1231]

Wow, what a great, informative thread!

We will have a co-sleeper right beside our bed. We plan on transitioning baby to the crib that is about five feet away from our bed when baby is mobile (crawling). Here are a few of our reasons:

1. Hubby also knows of someone who suffocated his baby while the baby was sleeping between the mother and father (thus, the reason for the co-sleeper).

2. Decreased risk of SIDS. From what I understand, being so near each other, your breathing patterns and waking up patterns start to merge. This means you don't wake up to a crying baby, you wake up to a stirring baby. Then you can nurse them, change them and go back to sleep all without daddy waking up.

3. I cringe at the thought of having to physically get up out of bed every two hours to nurse all night long for a few months. It will be easier to have baby within arm's reach and a soft light nearby.

We aren't co-sleeping for very long, because I don't like the idea of a little one crawling over to make an already cramped full-size bed even more cramped, but I do want to do a variation of it for awhile. I'm hoping it works out smoothly for our family.

 

[beccasmommy]

we co-slept with DD for about 3 months then we had her in a bassinette then I HAD to move her to the room across the hall because every noise and wimper would have me flying out of bed half asleep and all crazy like....

My DS well I never did sleep with him (he never slept) He had undiagnosed reflux and all he did for the first year was cry....

 

[micbmac]

There is nothing wrong w/it. My parents did it w/us and I did it w/both my daughter and son. It made it so much easier to breast feed in the middle of the night. Not a lot of loss of sleep. My son and daughter were sleeping completely by themselves around age 2. They are perfectly normal.

 

[Kazamataz]

Do all of you breastfeed in the middle on the night?

My son sleeps straight through he has since he came home from the hospital.

does anyone else's bubs sleep straight through?
or am i just lucky?

 

[CelticRose]

None of my boys slept through; all my girls did. One of the girls was still a co~sleeper. She had impressive needs for physical contact. One of the girls slept in a full sized crib from the day she came home; she has always spread!~eagled herself but slept 12 hours a night right from day one. I would have been psychotic from lack of sleep if we hadn't co~slept with the twins as they were on
different schedules but we only ever had one in the bed at a time. When the second one woke to feed I changed them over.

 

[AutumnDreamer]

Do all of you breastfeed in the middle on the night?

My son sleeps straight through he has since he came home from the hospital.

does anyone else's bubs sleep straight through?
or am i just lucky?

Only my first slept through the night when she came home, she started to show signs of failure to thrive so I switched to formula, she started waking up to be fed right after that.

 

[sparassidae]

Do all of you breastfeed in the middle on the night?

My son sleeps straight through he has since he came home from the hospital.

does anyone else's bubs sleep straight through?
or am i just lucky?

1) Fed every 2 hours, day and night, for the first 9 months. Then he moved to every 3 hours, then night feeds dropped down till he night weaned at 18 months. (night weaning is our definition of sleeping through, cause if I'm not feeding then we don't wake up even if they do)

2) Fed every 3 hours for the first 4 months, then dropped to about 2 night feeds. Slept through 11 months.

3) Fed every 3 hours for about 2 months, then 2 night feeds till about 12 months. Slept through 18 months.

4) Fed 3 hours for about 2 months, currently has about 2 night feeds at 7 months.

All parented the same, quite a bit of variation. We're so glad we had the hard one first


Beth 1231:
<We aren't co-sleeping for very long, because I don't like the idea of a little one crawling over to make an already cramped full-size bed even more cramped>

Babies gravitate to the nearest body (more so if it's mum). It's like a magnetic attraction. Long before they can crawl, and even before they can roll, they 'wriggle' towards you. We have a king size bed, and when 3yo comes in (usually around 2am) she likes to sleep between DH and I. She gravitates to me as well, so I usually end up with about 6 inches of space. Fine unless I want to roll over....

 

[sparassidae]

Oh and after last night, let me tell you that children snuggling and babies feeding doesn't disturb your sleep anywhere near as much as the smoke alarm going off at midnight.


That had me out of bed and running before I was fully awake.

Don't worry, no fire, I think it's malfunctioning. I had to take the battery out so we could sleep. So today I'm

 

[lovesdolphins]

Hubby has said from before we got married that there will be no babes in our bed. I think for ease of breastfeeding, etc - we will probably have a bassinet next to the bed, at least for a little while (that is if I get pg).

I just can't figure out, if you don't leave the child alone during the day, and they sleep with you at night, when do you get your alone time (read 'sex').

My best friend's 4yr old sleeps with them at times, but normally he'll wake up around 2am or later, and come into bed.

 

[JulySheMustFly]

We co-slept till our babies were in need of more space than our full size bed offered. I think it was somewhere around 8 months. It made life much easier with breastfeeding and sleeping. I could sleep while they were eating. We never had any problem finding married time. I mean really there is a reason we had 3 children in 4 years.

 

[HeKnowsMyName]

Do all of you breastfeed in the middle on the night?

My son sleeps straight through he has since he came home from the hospital.

does anyone else's bubs sleep straight through?
or am i just lucky?

Do you want me to pop you now or wait till later? DS is almost 11 months old and still not sleeping through the night. *sigh* My first child did though so I consider myself blessed.

 

[HeKnowsMyName]

I just can't figure out, if you don't leave the child alone during the day, and they sleep with you at night, when do you get your alone time (read 'sex').

There are other rooms in the house for alone time.

 

[sparassidae]

And yes, you can have sex in bed next to a sleeping baby. Somehow they manage to sleep through the bouncing..........

 

[seamonster]

And yes, you can have sex in bed next to a sleeping baby. Somehow they manage to sleep through the bouncing..........

...but why would you want to?

 

[seamonster]

Originally Posted by Kazamataz
Do all of you breastfeed in the middle on the night?

My son sleeps straight through he has since he came home from the hospital.

does anyone else's bubs sleep straight through?
or am i just lucky?

my son wakes once in the night to eat, but he WAS waking at least 3x in the night (until about 9/10 weeks), so we coslept until he was sleeping for longer stretches.

 

[Kazamataz]

...but why would you want to?

yes why would you?

 

[Kazamataz]

Do you want me to pop you now or wait till later? DS is almost 11 months old and still not sleeping through the night. *sigh* My first child did though so I consider myself blessed.

LOL so i take that as I'm lucky to have a bubs who sleeps through

 

[Singin4Him]

Do all of you breastfeed in the middle on the night?

My son sleeps straight through he has since he came home from the hospital.

does anyone else's bubs sleep straight through?
or am i just lucky?

We began co-sleeping because of colic, it was not something we planned to do but that was the only way we were getting sleep. Right now we're in the process of transitioning to his cradle though. Also because I breastfeed it's much easier. However since about 2 and a half to 3 months he's been sleeping through the night 9pm-8:30am every night so it is very very rare that I feed him in bed at night anymore.