Church

[Langley]

Do you sometime struggle when going to Church, listening to the sermons and not really sure what to make of it all?

I am not having a crisis of faith, quite the opposite, but what niggles me is the incessant "Have to be praising God more" or Do better in your Christian life"



A few weeks ago one of the worship leaders who was actually taking the service yelled out at the congregation to be more enthusiasic. I felt that was totally inappropriate and un-necessary. They may feel happy and want to jump around, great for them but others may not want to.


There is no right or wrong but i bugs the life out of me to be told what i should and should not feel in Church.

It is a evangelical church which is very different from my old church. I have been going there for 9 months, my wife worked there a few years back and started to go there. We have talked about going to other churches but she has a lot of friends there. A difficult one.


I have tried to talk to others about this but they say i will get used to it. not really a reply i was expecting.

Any one been in a similar situation?

 

[Shulamite]

I feel that your personal relationship with Jesus should be exactly that... PERSONAL.
What you feel is between you and Jesus.
That's not to say that we cannot express our joy and love for Him openly with others. I do that even on this forum.... but I am a very private worshipper.
I view my relationship with Jesus as a "secret place" and I have a private life with Jesus as well as a public life.

Jesus is the Bridegroom of the church and we are His bride. In any marriage, there are private aspects and there are public aspects. Imagine if another person walked up to you and told you that you had to be more "publicly" demonstrative toward your wife, in front of others. Suppose someone told you that because you didn't DISPLAY your affection for your spouse more openly so that others can see it, that you don't love her/him! Well, that's not for them to judge. What you and your spouse have together is known between the 2 of you. Just because others don't understand or see it doesn't matter.
I feel that way in church.
Jesus is my Bridegroom. He and I have a secret place of relationship with one another. I sing and give praise to Him in church, but I don't care if "man" doesn't understand or "see and understand" what my intimacy is with Jesus is in private.

Since when does our personal relationship with Jesus have to be "seen" and judged by "man" in order to be legitimate? Paul often speaks of letting no man judge him. He knew His own heart with the Lord.

If you and Jesus have a personal, growing relationship, then enjoy it with Him! Don't let others interfere with that.
Jesus often taught that we are to "go into our closet and pray in secret and the Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you." Jesus is speaking of your private life with Him.

In an earthly marriage, do we walk around trying to PROVE to others who notice us that we are in love with our spouse or does it just come through "naturally" as they see us?

Don't let that worship leader upset you. He may have meant well and I am not judging his heart in this, but let Jesus be the Only One who guides your heart how to love Him and express that love, both privately and publicly, okay?

If you have Him as your guide, you have all you need!
blessings to you!

 

[MsScarlett]

Big amens to what Shulamite said!
And yes, I have been in a similar situation, and I left.
Please try to convince your wife to at least try other churches.

 

[Langley]

I feel that your personal relationship with Jesus should be exactly that... PERSONAL.
What you feel is between you and Jesus.
That's not to say that we cannot express our joy and love for Him openly with others. I do that even on this forum.... but I am a very private worshipper.
I view my relationship with Jesus as a "secret place" and I have a private life with Jesus as well as a public life.

Jesus is the Bridegroom of the church and we are His bride. In any marriage, there are private aspects and there are public aspects. Imagine if another person walked up to you and told you that you had to be more "publicly" demonstrative toward your wife, in front of others. Suppose someone told you that because you didn't DISPLAY your affection for your spouse more openly so that others can see it, that you don't love her/him! Well, that's not for them to judge. What you and your spouse have together is known between the 2 of you. Just because others don't understand or see it doesn't matter.
I feel that way in church.
Jesus is my Bridegroom. He and I have a secret place of relationship with one another. I sing and give praise to Him in church, but I don't care if "man" doesn't understand or "see and understand" what my intimacy is with Jesus is in private.

Since when does our personal relationship with Jesus have to be "seen" and judged by "man" in order to be legitimate? Paul often speaks of letting no man judge him. He knew His own heart with the Lord.

If you and Jesus have a personal, growing relationship, then enjoy it with Him! Don't let others interfere with that.
Jesus often taught that we are to "go into our closet and pray in secret and the Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you." Jesus is speaking of your private life with Him.

In an earthly marriage, do we walk around trying to PROVE to others who notice us that we are in love with our spouse or does it just come through "naturally" as they see us?

Don't let that worship leader upset you. He may have meant well and I am not judging his heart in this, but let Jesus be the Only One who guides your heart how to love Him and express that love, both privately and publicly, okay?

If you have Him as your guide, you have all you need!
blessings to you!

Shulamite - Thanks for your comments, they are most helpful.

We do go to to a differnt church every so offen but it is not local, we want to keep that community link to the town we live in.

There is never going to be the perfect church, it is not a bad one but just sometimes i get rattled by what is done.

Don't get me started on the flag waving..................

 

[Shulamite]

Morning!

I am so glad that the Lord used anything that I said to encourage you.

Just remember that your private relationship in your heart with Jesus is YOURS AND HIS and to Him alone do you stand or fall. No man can truly see or understand the secret place in your heart that you have with Jesus!

That's worth celebrating.

 

[capnator]

http://www.theadventure.org/index.php?option=com_sermon&view=list&limit=10&gid=6

Check that out - Herb larson sermons.

 

[Yitzchak]

The thing is there is private worship and then there is corporate worship... I can stay home and put on music and worship however I please. but when we choose to be part of the worship that is the group thing we cannot take it to such an extreme...

So fully honest feedback here. You are at one unhealthy extreme and the worship leader is at the opposite unhealthy extreme.
There needs to be some give and take and a little better communication and coming together in agreement...

 

[Langley]

The thing is there is private worship and then there is corporate worship... I can stay home and put on music and worship however I please. but when we choose to be part of the worship that is the group thing we cannot take it to such an extreme...

So fully honest feedback here. You are at one unhealthy extreme and the worship leader is at the opposite unhealthy extreme.
There needs to be some give and take and a little better communication and coming together in agreement...

So you have never been to a church service that has done nothing for you? There was so much singing it got to a point of doing your head in. Or the preacher ranted on as it was his "hobby horse"
Yes, we should always go to church to praise God but it has to be done in a way that the indivudual is able to do just that, without being distracted by the goings on.
It's easy to say just accept it and deal with it, but try it for once.

Have you ever told a worship leader you are unhappy about the way they do things?

 

[Yitzchak]

So you have never been to a church service that has done nothing for you? There was so much singing it got to a point of doing your head in. Or the preacher ranted on as it was his "hobby horse"
Yes, we should always go to church to praise God but it has to be done in a way that the indivudual is able to do just that, without being distracted by the goings on.
It's easy to say just accept it and deal with it, but try it for once.

Have you ever told a worship leader you are unhappy about the way they do things?

If you are asking me if I have ever been put in a situation where I have been frustrated , the answer is yes.... But here is a fully honest response to you again.....When that happens it is almost always because God is trying to get me to grow up in some area and move beyond my comfort level.... You are being stretched beyond what is comfortable for you.

 

[Yitzchak]

This situation you are in is God's answer to your desire and prayers....It is just not the way you expected God to answer......

 

[Langley]

Does than then give the rght for people to shout and carry on? I do not think so.

God know in my heart i struggle with this, so i guess he is not gonig to condem me for not being that jolly worshipper if something is niggling me.

 

[Yitzchak]

Does than then give the rght for people to shout and carry on? I do not think so.

God know in my heart i struggle with this, so i guess he is not gonig to condem me for not being that jolly worshipper if something is niggling me.

Condemned is a strong word to use. Chastised or corrected is more accurate , I think. Which no one likes either , of course... Especially when you don't even think you were doing anything wrong to be corrected for. I certainly understand that aspect of it...
But is the correction for not shouting or is it for wanting your own way about it ??
I mean if they are there to play the music as you see fit then they are not really leading the worship , they are just playing an instrument. As I said before , when I am at home in privacy or in my car and put on music and worship then it is all about me and God. When I go to a public gathering , it is no longer just about me and God....There has to be a coming together as a group....

The thing I get out of your post is you want it your way and the worship leader wants it his way...Since he is leading worship and you are not , that gives him the better excuse to push for his way but in my view you are both wrong....Him for being pushy and you for being self centered and uncooperative....

But that is just me.....And you certainly don't have to do it my way either.

The way things work in my life is I get a good old fashioned spanking from God if I have a fit the way you described about not wanting someone to tell me what to do....

When I got my army training , they told me how to stand , how to sit , when to yell and when to be quiet....

Most churches have a structure. When to sit , when to stand , when to sing and when to be quiet... Just because this is a little more than you are used to , is it now wrong for the church leaders to lead the way they see as right ???

 

[Yitzchak]

Maybe I can be more clear if I lay it out sytematically....

First..This man is the worship leader and decided he wanted the worship to be enthusiastic and involve shouting. Now he decides which songs are sung and for how long..when the worship starts and when it ends. He is the worship leader and that is the way he choose to lead.

Second,

It seems to me that the objection is not just to being pressured but that no matter how he brought it up...you're not going to worship that way unless the mood strikes you..In other words , no one can lead you in worship , you worship as you choose....

Third,the bible records shouting and enthusiastic worship at times. It also includes quiet times and lots of other types... So the type of worship which he choose that morning is actually biblical in the sense that it is one legitimate way to worship...

People were reluctant to cooperate with the direction that the worship leader wanted to take things and so he got frustrated and flipped out a bit. Now he is wrong for flipping out but not wrong for leading the worship that he was assigned to lead.

So the way I see it , people come to that worship service with an attitude of doing it their own way and not submitting to the structure in place. They dig their heels in and say no one is going to tell me how to worship...Not very spiritual and not very mature and not very humble.

Now don't think I am all angry or on a rant. I actually hate posting this sort of thing. But God put it on my heart to push the issue a bit because it is something someone on here needs to hear.

Now I am done and can relax.... I hope things work out for you in your situation. You seem like you really love the Lord and are making an honest attempt to make the situation work...

 

[Neena750]

[Quote}Do you sometime struggle when going to Church, listening to the sermons and not really sure what to make of it all?

I am not having a crisis of faith, quite the opposite, but what niggles me is the incessant "Have to be praising God more" or Do better in your Christian life"



A few weeks ago one of the worship leaders who was actually taking the service yelled out at the congregation to be more enthusiasic. I felt that was totally inappropriate and un-necessary. They may feel happy and want to jump around, great for them but others may not want to.


There is no right or wrong but i bugs the life out of me to be told what i should and should not feel in Church.

It is a evangelical church which is very different from my old church. I have been going there for 9 months, my wife worked there a few years back and started to go there. We have talked about going to other churches but she has a lot of friends there. A difficult one.


I have tried to talk to others about this but they say i will get used to it. not really a reply i was expecting.

Any one been in a similar situation?[/Quote]

So I have a question.... Do you feel that God has lead you and your wife to go to church there? or is it a social thing?
So here is the thing... if you are going there just to keep the social aspect? You want to go so you can have the natural feel good part of the service that leaves you to get all warm and fuzzy ....that you can say your amens, and while your saying your amens your thinking about going to the nearest favorite lunch spot after church???? OR do you want to go and meet with God???
If you know that God lead you to this church then you need to submit to the leadership and authority that God has put into place of this church???

So it seems to me that it is an area of faith.... When in doubt fast and pray, and if you don't hear the first time fast and pray again and longer or until you know without a doubt that this is exactly where you are to be going with your wife, and if there is a issue about having friend there, if they are your real friends then God will bring times and places to fellowship....

 

[JPPT1974]

Sometimes you have to stop and
Think about what God is saying to us
Getting His word through to us
In the way that we live
If you stop and think about it.