Did your opinion on how many children you want or how much space you want between them change after you gave birth for the first time? If so, how? If not, why not?
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Changes in opinion about family size.
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sparassidae
In Christ Alone
No. And that's an absolute miracle because DS was a high needs baby. No sleep, intense emotions etc. When people asked if we were having more, we would say "it depends. Sometimes we want 4, other times he's an only child". 
But there we were 2 years later having #2.
After having #3 the midwife in the delivery suite asked if we were having any more, we said "probably". I can't speak for a horrifying birth experience, but for an average one, you do forget really quickly.
But there we were 2 years later having #2.
After having #3 the midwife in the delivery suite asked if we were having any more, we said "probably". I can't speak for a horrifying birth experience, but for an average one, you do forget really quickly.
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When people asked if we were having more, we would say "it depends. Sometimes we want 4, other times he's an only child".
ROFL...hubby says the same thing.
When our DD (2) is crying and whining he says to her: "Do you know that you are crying away any chance of having a brother or sister?". He is only joking of course, but some days we really do feel like we'll never cope with more than one.
We had originally wanted 4, but now that we have DD we have realized that kids are far more expensive than we has expected and really hard work.
I was expecting hard work, in fact I think I had a realistic idea of how hard it would be before we had her, but you can never imagine the emotions that go along with that. You invest all your emotions in these little people and I just had no clue how totally exhausting that can be, so in that sense I wasn't prepared.
We change out mind all the time, but at this point it looks like we will only have 2.
As for the age-gap...I had wanted 2 years but is going to end up being closer to 3 or 4, simply because I couldn't carry on working from home when we have another one and we have to have my salary or we lose our apartment. Purely a financial decision as far as the age-gap goes.
As you may have guessed, I'm not quiverfull
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AJ29
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I change my mind daily!
My 2 kids are 2 years apart. I think I want another, and if I want another 2 year gap, it is time to start trying. I am not ready yet thoug (also not quiverfull), and to be honest, I don't know if/when I will be ready.
Wait and see! Unless you are quiverfull, or well into your child-bearing years, there is no rush to decide and no hard and fast rules!
Just enjoy your babies as they happen!
My 2 kids are 2 years apart. I think I want another, and if I want another 2 year gap, it is time to start trying. I am not ready yet thoug (also not quiverfull), and to be honest, I don't know if/when I will be ready.
Wait and see! Unless you are quiverfull, or well into your child-bearing years, there is no rush to decide and no hard and fast rules!
Just enjoy your babies as they happen!
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we went from 2-3 to now having number 7. though i remember wanting 6 when we got married and hubby didn't
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Christdefinesme
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- Sep 21, 2005
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yes, I wanted MAYBE 2 and hubby wanted 7. So we decided to take it one at a time, and see where the Lord leads.
We have 4 now, having a great time with our kids, loved having babies, and we're not sure if we're done yet.
We have 4 now, having a great time with our kids, loved having babies, and we're not sure if we're done yet.
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RedTulipMom
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i change my mind from day to day..lol
sometimes i want 4 more and other times i am happy with the 3 i have and feel its enough..but i am quiverful so it's really gonna be up to God no matter how many times i change my mind about it...lol.
The scary thing is i am about to turn 39 and i might have another 10 yrs of fertility in me...we'll see what happens.
sometimes i want 4 more and other times i am happy with the 3 i have and feel its enough..but i am quiverful so it's really gonna be up to God no matter how many times i change my mind about it...lol.
The scary thing is i am about to turn 39 and i might have another 10 yrs of fertility in me...we'll see what happens.
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jgonz
What G-d calls you to do, He equips you to do.
- Feb 11, 2005
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I thought it would be cool to have 5 (probably because our Catholic neighbors when I was growing up had 5 and it seemed fun ).
DH, when we got engaged, said he wanted 10. I laughed. Don't laugh....
I'm pregnant with #10.
). DH, when we got engaged, said he wanted 10. I laughed. Don't laugh....
I'm pregnant with #10.
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Yes. We downsized
When DH and I got married we travelled a lot, went away, ate out etc. Doing that with one child was quite easy, doing that with 2 was a bit more difficult but we managed and decided we weren't going to try for more.
We're happy with 2 and for now it's plenty
When DH and I got married we travelled a lot, went away, ate out etc. Doing that with one child was quite easy, doing that with 2 was a bit more difficult but we managed and decided we weren't going to try for more.
We're happy with 2 and for now it's plenty
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yeah, I wanted lots! Then I saw my friend have 3 in 3 years, and I thanked God for my 2 year gap!
I still want lots, but I'm more patient now (slightly 
) and waiting on God's perfect timing, I don't know if there will be any more... (quiverfull with some fertility issues.)
I agree with Jilly123, I was as prepared as I could be, but how difficult it can be was a surprise - especially after #2.
I still want lots, but I'm more patient now (slightly ) and waiting on God's perfect timing, I don't know if there will be any more... (quiverfull with some fertility issues.)I agree with Jilly123, I was as prepared as I could be, but how difficult it can be was a surprise - especially after #2.
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cristianna
...dancing in the rain...
The only thing making me reconsider at this time, is only selfish reasons. Our youngest is about to turn 10, and truthfully it's nice to not have sleepless nights except the occasional nightmare or just can't sleep nights, baby proofing, diaper bags and all of the preplanning required with younger ones- we've even just packed up spur of the moment for a weekend getaway, and many more.
Even though I look at the selfish reasons not to, I most definitely have a desire (dh does not) and would welcome more children any day. It's when I really sit down and think about it, I think wow, that would make a ton of changes to our lifestyle and routine.
Even though I look at the selfish reasons not to, I most definitely have a desire (dh does not) and would welcome more children any day. It's when I really sit down and think about it, I think wow, that would make a ton of changes to our lifestyle and routine.
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gracepaints
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I wanted to have our first two really close together. Pregnancy is tough though, so I can't imagine doing it while caring for a baby. Plus, I've extended our breastfeeding plans, so I'd like to wait until he's at least two so as not to cause premature weaning.
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It has changed the number of biological children I want. At the beginning of pregnancy, I swore up and down I would only do this once and then have 2-3 internationally adopted children (think Angelina Jolie ).
After having ds, now I'd like to have 1-2 more bio and 1-2 adopted, for a total of 3 to 5 children.
So having a child has changed my perspective.
). After having ds, now I'd like to have 1-2 more bio and 1-2 adopted, for a total of 3 to 5 children.
So having a child has changed my perspective.
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I wanted 3 kids about 2 years apart. Then Nate was born. He has been high-energy from the frist day. He's 4 now and I still haven't had a full nights sleep. When he's up he's a combination between a tornado and the tazmanian devil.......go, go, go. We're talking about a 2nd baby - I think that Nate will be a help at this age *(he'd be 5 1/2 before any baby at this point).
My sister, on the other hand just had baby girl on Saturday and her son just turned 1 in March (so they are 13 months 13 days apart). YIKES!
My sister, on the other hand just had baby girl on Saturday and her son just turned 1 in March (so they are 13 months 13 days apart). YIKES!
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Interesting answers! Thanks!
I want to have as many as I can get but people often say, 'oh you'll change your mind after June'. So I was curious about other people's experiences.
I want to have as many as I can get
but people often say, 'oh you'll change your mind after June'. So I was curious about other people's experiences.
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sgrimsley
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Mine changed. I chose to go natural (no epidural no drugs) and I had a 10 hour labor. It went pretty textbook. I think I may want a boy someday, but I will be totally fine with just one baby... my daughter is perfect. Unfortunately I am unable to forget the pain, but would willingly do it a hundred times again for my little Lilly.
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Hadassah
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I thought it would be cool to have 5 (probably because our Catholic neighbors when I was growing up had 5 and it seemed fun
DH, when we got engaged, said he wanted 10. I laughed. Don't laugh....
As my mom always says "Never, ever... (ever!) say never!!"
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