Hello I am 20 year old college student and have been dating my girlfriend for over 2.5 years and yesterday she found out I cheated on her over a year ago. But she found out and broke up with me instantly. We are both Christians but we don't to to church as much as needed, but I pray every night and I'm pretty sure she does to. But now she said she can never take me back but she is my first love we met in high school go to the same college and everything, and for the last 2 days my life is terrible I can't focus, i have no appetite, I begged and pleaded to her for a 2nd chance to change and I know if she was to give me another chance I would be a great man for her but she seems like nothing will change. I have prayed and asked her to pray but nothing seems to make her give me another chance, please I need help I love her more than I loved anyone and made a terrible mistake. What do I do?
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Caught cheating..what do I do?
- Thread starter Ry2k12
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- Aug 11, 2004
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Let her go. No one can change her mind but God.
What is meant to be will somehow find a way.
What is meant to be will somehow find a way.
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If Not For Grace
Legend-but then so's Keith Richards
- Feb 4, 2005
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and why should He?
Sometimes you don't know how good you got it till it's gone. Maybe it will make you value the next woman more. Not even God can change the past and actions have consequences.
You can not unring a bell or unspread butter. Mistakes cost you, you need to charge it up to lesson learned. Sad but So.
Sometimes you don't know how good you got it till it's gone. Maybe it will make you value the next woman more. Not even God can change the past and actions have consequences.
You can not unring a bell or unspread butter. Mistakes cost you, you need to charge it up to lesson learned. Sad but So.
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So i am just supposed to stop? No, I can't do that. I know I made a mistake but doesn't everyone deserve a second chance? No one but god is perfect, and since Im the one responsible for this I have to fix this, I just know she is the one for me and the stupid mistake I made was even more of an eye opener for me. I just need positive help, I want the truth but I need help.
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If she doesn't want it fixed, you cannot fix it. No matter how hard you try.
If you love her, give her space and allow her to make whatever decisions actually make her happy.
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No one *deserves" a second chance, exactly, although Jesus does teach forgiveness. But we're not perfect. You aren't, and your girl friend isn't. There are some things that we can't get past. Maybe she should; I don't know the two of you and your relationship. But if she's not going to be able to trust you again, better you start over, having learned something important.
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Love?
He already does. Kind of the point of this thread.
Um, yes, God can.
And I heard as it were the voice of a great multitude, and as the voice of many waters, and as the voice of mighty thunderings, saying, Alleluia: for the Lord God omnipotent reigneth. --Revelation 19:6
Emphasizing the key word...
Yeah, it's too bad his girlfriend is unforgiving. If she doesn't want to forgive and try again, there's nothing anyone can do, sadly enough. Except God, and I don't think He is going to make an exception and violate free will here.
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ManiKing
Love is unconditional
- Oct 14, 2011
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As much as it sucks, you have to respect her decision and deal with the bed you've made. That doesn't necessarily mean you guys won't get through this, but it would be best to let her calm her heart & mind.. instead of trying to convince her into making a decision whilst dealing with a load of emotions.
While you guys are apart, take this time to ask for forgiveness and release yourself free from the burden of regret/guilt. The true step to forgiveness, is to be able to forgive yourself.
If she doesn't come through, take this as a lesson learned.
We are all human, built with imperfections, but life goes on.
While you guys are apart, take this time to ask for forgiveness and release yourself free from the burden of regret/guilt. The true step to forgiveness, is to be able to forgive yourself.
If she doesn't come through, take this as a lesson learned.
We are all human, built with imperfections, but life goes on.
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I'm sorry, this is kind of juvenile, but this thread is about the OP cheating on his girlfriend, you talked about him dealing "with the bed you've made". You made a pun.
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CrystalBrooke
I'm almost positive I don't care what you think
You just have to suck it up and realize that she may not ever trust you again, and what's a relationship without trust. Now, I believe you can change..I'm not in the line of thought that "once a cheater, always a cheater", that just isn't true. But, you broke something very fragile and some people can't get past that, your lady might be one of them. Give her space for a while, you owe her that after what you did...then later maybe see if she wants to meet for lunch or coffee to talk about what happened.
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E
elenore
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You don't deserve a second chance. And trying to convince her that you do is a lie. You broke her trust now live with the consequences.
(and I notice she found out a year later - you didn't tell her). Trust?
You've got a bit of a nerve.
(and I notice she found out a year later - you didn't tell her). Trust?
You've got a bit of a nerve.
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Elenore, don't you know that the measure by which you measure is how you'll be measured? Give the poor young man the benefit of the doubt.
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Give her time, bro. She's clearly hurting, and she clearly blames you. Give her some time to sort everything out. She'll either be able to move past it or she won't, and there's nothing you can do about it.
In the meantime, don't beat yourself up too bad; if everyone didn't screw up, they wouldn't need Jesus. Get out of the house. Go hang out with friends. See movies. If this doesn't work out then things are going to suck for a while, but it gets better. You're going to be alright.
Oh, and don't ask women for advice about women. They may know the territory, but they've never tried to navigate it.
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AgapeGrace
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I think you need to just let her do what she needs, don't try and get her back. sometimes to truly forgive someone we must move on from them. I was cheated on by my very first boyfriend, and I was very uspet, every part of my body ached and I couldn't see for crying, I remember clearly running home from school and just curling up and crying. I felt I could never trust another man - let alone him.
It' not easy for people to get over these things and sometimes for our own happiness and sanity we must move on from people who hurt us. She needs to move on and be able to live her life happily without feeling unable to trust her partner. Everyone deserves a loving and faithful partner.
I hope that you have learnt something and know to treat relationships with due respect and faithfulness. You will have many more I'm sure - and you will find another girlfriend, all hope is not lost. For now perhaps you can do things for yourself as a single man
This comment hurt me a bit:
"She's clearly hurting, and she clearly blames you."
she blames him because he abused her trust. Which is true, and it sure does hurt when that happens - who else is there to blame but the person who cheated?
It' not easy for people to get over these things and sometimes for our own happiness and sanity we must move on from people who hurt us. She needs to move on and be able to live her life happily without feeling unable to trust her partner. Everyone deserves a loving and faithful partner.
I hope that you have learnt something and know to treat relationships with due respect and faithfulness. You will have many more I'm sure - and you will find another girlfriend, all hope is not lost. For now perhaps you can do things for yourself as a single man
This comment hurt me a bit:
"She's clearly hurting, and she clearly blames you."
she blames him because he abused her trust. Which is true, and it sure does hurt when that happens - who else is there to blame but the person who cheated?
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Thank you everyone for all the good and bad and honest advice. I appreciate it. As of right now we have spoken, started talking again, tried to be together again and stopped and started all in 3 weeks so I have been up and down but god has been with me this whole time. Thanks again everyone.
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