Caring for a sister.

[genux33]

Well i have a liking for this sister in my group, but she does not know that i like her. how do i show my concern to her as a close friend, without stumbled people,and letting people suspect that i have liking for her.... i do not mean to secretly show concern to her and it not the right time to let people know of my liking, but i wanted to care and encourage for her as a brother and still having a accountable spirit.

 

[Living4Him03]

i'm working on that one myself...except it's a guy I've got my eye on lol

pray, pray, pray , pray, and did I mention to pray?

 

[wvmtnkid]

Oh, the age old question! I would encourage you to develop a friendship with her. In doing that, you will get to know her better and she will get to know you better. Hopefully in the process you will see if this is a person you will want to have a relationship with. If it turns out that both of you feel that you want to take the relationship beyond friendship, then you can talk it out after you get to know each other better and see where your feelings are then. And as Living4Him03 mentioned, praying and asking God's guidance is always a good step. Ask Him to open doors for you both, and to close the ones that He does not have for you to walk through. If things don't work out, the worse thing you have done is made a new friend in Christ.

 

[genux33]

well , last few months she approached me that she like to join my current ministry that i in, because of her interest, but due to timings and busyness , she unable to join and mentioned that she will join next year. i never know when she will be joining my ministry again next year(maybe few months later, maybe 1 year later). i told God that if she is the girl that God planned for me (I really hope she is the ONE), i will be able to see her in the ministry that i in. i sent the request to God and faithfully walk with God and pray to him about my desire to see her joining in my ministry ,so i can get to know her more when we serve together. On the other hand, i did not do anything to keep remind her whether she want to join, but instead, i left it on God's hand and wanting God to surprise me(for example, she approach me saying she ready to join - that what she did for the first time she asking if she can join in.).

1) am i doing the right thing infront of God?
2) is God plan about "waiting for the right time"?
3)how do i know the right timing that God set for me, is it by the happenings that occurs which help to build up my friendship with her?

 

[Living4Him03]

God's plan is more than waiting for the right time...it's about trusting in Him and trusting His plans completely. Waiting for the right time is part of it. You will know when the time is right. It may not be completely apparent to you at first, but you'll know. Also, this girl may not be the one for you and you have to accept that and keep your focus on God. Everything else will fall into place. Looks like you're headed in the right direction.

 

[Sketcher]

well , last few months she approached me that she like to join my current ministry that i in, because of her interest, but due to timings and busyness , she unable to join and mentioned that she will join next year. i never know when she will be joining my ministry again next year(maybe few months later, maybe 1 year later). i told God that if she is the girl that God planned for me (I really hope she is the ONE), i will be able to see her in the ministry that i in. i sent the request to God and faithfully walk with God and pray to him about my desire to see her joining in my ministry ,so i can get to know her more when we serve together. On the other hand, i did not do anything to keep remind her whether she want to join, but instead, i left it on God's hand and wanting God to surprise me(for example, she approach me saying she ready to join - that what she did for the first time she asking if she can join in.).

1) am i doing the right thing infront of God?
2) is God plan about "waiting for the right time"?
3)how do i know the right timing that God set for me, is it by the happenings that occurs which help to build up my friendship with her?

She may join the ministry but she may not be for you. So don't get your hopes up if she joins. I've made little "signs" for God to complete, I've jumped the gun, and that is the road to some serious pain and dissapointment. Because you will think God said "yes" when He really didn't.

The right timing - that will come with actually being friends with her and actually getting to know her. Also, what you want is the input of some of your closest and most trusted friends, because if they see a problem and your parents see a problem and your leaders see a problem then there is a problem and you shouldn't get/stay together. That is a far more useful sign than anything you can concoct in your head.

 

[genux33]

by the way, regarding this sentence "God's plan is more than waiting for the right time...it's about trusting in Him and trusting His plans completely.God's plan is more than waiting for the right time...it's about trusting in Him and trusting His plans completely." , do it mean "let the nature takes its course"?

i was wondering since the feeling is one-sided as in i have the liking for her , but she do not know about my feeling and only treat me as a friend. By trusting in God, and if God planned her to be the one, do God touch her heart and let her build the mutual liking on me?

How do mutual feeling between a good friend to a relationship happen? does it happen because of God or it depend on the feeling of the person?

 

[Living4Him03]

that's a pretty loaded question, actually (meaning there's no simple answer).

You trust that God's plans for you are above and beyond your own plans. That's it. You trust Him. If He wants you to get married, that's great. If He wants this girl to fall for you, great. He wants obedience and for you to trust in His plans no matter what. Which means leaving the situation in His hands and not worrying so much about whether she will like you, how it might happen, how to ask her out, etc. All I can say is God will let you know. It's about completely trusting in Him.

Sorry if that doesn't answer your question, I can't really explain it any other way and I'm not going to list the steps it takes to go from friends to a relationship. However, I will say that sometimes a relationship does happen simply based on how two people feel, not necessarily based on seeking God's will. I think it can be both though. You are crazy about someone and they feel the same and God leads you into that relationship for His glory. It just really depends. Prayer is always better than the answers I could give you!

 

[genux33]

i wanted to give myself 1 year time's to pray about it and let the leader know about my feeling for her. 1 year not too long right?

 

[VivDaGurl]

Get to know her better and try to ask her out but with a group of people. Organise something and invite her along. From there, you would be able to see the type of girl she is. Then, and ask God to lead you in pursuing this relationship. It's not the matter whether how much time you want to give yourself before you reveal your feelings to her but it's God's timing. Pray and ask God to show you when is the best timing and also seek the Lord as to whether is she the girl for you. Ask for signs from the Lord and He'll show you whether is this the girl for you. Should everything be positive, go up to let your church leaders or whomever who is concern for this girl's future (may not be the leader) know of your feelings. Get them to pray along side with you and ask them for advice. Do not rush into things and a relationship that has not been built with a strong friendship foundation isn't going to be stable.

If it's God's Will for the girl to be with you, she will be with you someday and you'll be surprised how God will draw the two of you together. Look towards the Lord and seek God's advice first.

 

[genux33]

"Ask for signs from the Lord and He'll show you whether is this the girl for you".

what kind of prayer should i ask from God. Can anyone guide me? what signs to ask God to show?

 

[Sketcher]

i wanted to give myself 1 year time's to pray about it and let the leader know about my feeling for her. 1 year not too long right?

One year is not too long, but you're talking like you want it to be one week. If you're really willing to wait a year, PUT IT ON THE SHELF. By then you'll actually know her and if she's really a good candidate for a wife. If you still feel that she's still qualified and you're still attracted to her after that long, go for it.

 

[genux33]

"Ask for signs from the Lord and He'll show you whether is this the girl for you".

what kind of prayer should i ask from God. Can anyone guide me? what signs to ask God to show?

any answer to this?