Can't repent

[Aphreal]

Your here and your seeking Help, your seeking God. That tells me that your heart has not been hardened. If Christ has allowed your heart to be hardened, You wouldnt be searching for answers. Bless you!

I feel desperation in your posts.. I also feel your under attack. Endure and continue to seek for answers. God is much bigger than your problems. We will pray for you and I suggest highly finding a christian fellowship for support (church)

*BIG HUGS!* Its not all lost matt Its not too late!

 

[paul becke]

It's strange, isn't it? In a sense, this forum itself constitutes a church. "Where two or more of you are gathered...". All the prayerful people out there "gathered" together with us, in Christ's name.

Keep up the good work, Matt. Nothing can force you to go back again to that serious sin, "neither life, nor death, nor principalities nor powers,...". You're only 18 years old, too, barely out of the womb. Take my word for it. And if I can see that, you may be sure God will.

But, in a way, your fear is healthy, if you recognise it as a gift to be used positively. You *have* learnt a priceless lesson: we are in the midst of a war of the vastest dimensions and the bitterest venom. By ourselves, *none* of us would have any chance at all. But with Christ at our shoulder, our enemies have already lost. Christianity is a joyful religion, as I'm sure you know. Be joyful, now you've "put on the armour" of whole-hearted faith and commitment again.

 

[Matt112]

Is there anything wrong with just trusting God, asking him to guard my heart from fear and just walk ?

I figure as long as I believe Jesus Christ is my Lord and Saviour nothing can harm me.

Is this right?

Is it okay not to be fearful ?

 

[paul becke]

It's the kind of fear that matters, Matt. It must be a prudent one, but not a negative one.

Without a prudent fear, we are prey to presumption and will fall into serious sin.

But a negative fear, going beyond elementary prudence, is also counter-productive in Christian terms, because it means we don't trust in God (as you rightly imply we should, in one of your questions), and our faith, hope and love, the so-called theological virtues, are too weak.

 

[Hidden in Christ]

Just wanted to add something that I don't think anyone else has said.

Matt112,
One thing you can remember when the devil tells you to kill yourself is this: you already died with Christ about 2000 years ago. Romans 6 tells us that as many as were baptized into Christ were baptized into His death. Therefore we are to "reckon ourselves dead unto sin but alive unto God" through what Christ did for us. Your sinful self that you hate (we all struggle with that to one extent or another) was crucified on Jesus' cross. He died in our place so we could have newness of life on earth and then one day have eternal life with Him in heaven. When you think of all the sins you've done and all the things about yourself that are less than perfect, remember all that was "hidden in Christ" when He died. I encourage you to read and study Romans 6.

 

[desi]

Just pray for God to open your heart and show you what to do next. Then stop worring about it and wait for God to open doors.

 

[Les Grands Pieds]

"I'm afraid my heart has been hardened past the point of repentance."

This state of being is not possible. Nobody can go that far. "Blessed are those who are spiritually unfullfilled" YOU! Oh, what a blessing it is to realize your need for God and his power. Keep in mind that just because you are blessed, that does not have to mean that you are happy. God loves you, keep trying. If you have enough determination, you WILL find the thing for which you are looking!

Give up all of your worldly possesions! They mean nothing. Let go of everything onto which you hold. IT'S ALL USELESS! EVERYTHING YOU CAN SEE WITH YOUR EYES IS ULTIMATELY USELESS!!!

 

[TheOriginalWhitehorse]

Hi, Matt. The Bible says we should work out our salvation with fear and trembling, but also perfect love casts out fear. So we have two kinds of fear. The main thing is to trust God, and that will lead you away from sin. But it is common for people-as Jesus Himself did-to go through temptuous assaults. It may help to have an advance plan for how you are going to handle every situation. Know the temptations. The minute they hit, hand them over to God. Have the verses ready and say them. Have a plan ready for what you'll do to evade the temptations the minute they hit. But you're right-trusting in God is key.

Philippians 2 :12: *

2:12Wherefore, my beloved, as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling.

1*John 4:18:

4:18There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.

This means we need to be concerned to make every effort, but that as we perfect in love, it will renew faith and in that sense we won't fear.

Blessings,
Whitehorse

 

[paul becke]

Matt, I know it's good that we all want to encourage you, but I've amended what I wrote above concerning prudent fear on the one hand, and a complacency/trust in God based on presumption, because it is not a matter of "being able to fall into serious sin", but of "inevitably" falling into serious sin, once we fall prey to presumption - a very serious sin in itself because it is a trap-door to serious sin. I speak from personal experience, as well as established doctrine.

I think St Paul refers to presumption in the following passage to the Galatians (5:13-14):

"My brothers, yu were called to liberty; but be careful, or this liberty will provide an opening for self-indulgence. Serve one another, rather, in works of love, since the whole of the Law is summarised in a single command: Love your neighbour as yourself".

I regret reverting to the less positive aspect of this matter, but I did sense, rightly or wrongly, that in your last post you might have been fishing for some encouragement to believe God wouldn't mind too much if you relapsed in the matter of the sexual side of your relationship with your girl-friend. As long as you trusted in his forgiveness.

But that is not the case. In spite of what Les Grands Pieds asserted, it is, as you seemed to be aware, quite possible to become inured to sin. People do indeed "go that far". Judas being the prime example, of course.

No doubt many people living in sin in our society will not be finally condemned for living in sin or even engaging in casual sex, because of the lack of a proper Christian awareness. I know and have known many people of essentially Christian character (including some who were rough diamonds, who were pretty obsessed with sex), who I would expect to arrive by God's grace, at the right path in due course.

However, though a Christian with a real faith, presumption no doubt led you to transgress in that way. And in your case, you have already been brought to your knees to beg forgiveness, so it is extremely important that you don't rate that forgiveness cheaply.

Having said all that, you nevertheless, have every reason to rejoice that you have returned to the enjoyment of a loving intimacy with God through his indwelling Holy Spirit, and a life filled with his love and guidance.

 

[TheOriginalWhitehorse]

Paul, you make some really great points. Fabulous, in fact. And I agree that the difference between faith and presumption is absolutely crucial-I wish more people understood this. There's an erroneous doctrine that says since we are saved by grace, that not being under the law means we are free to disobey the law. And that makes Christians think they can continue under sin, to their own peril. Where God says that the soul that sins shall die, and that it is better to cut off a hand if it makes us sin and go to heaven maimed rather than go into hell full, and that we do not abolish the law but rather uphold it, this is the movement that whispers, "Hath God said? You shall not surely die!"

1 Corinthians 6:9-11 says:

9*Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, 10*Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God. 11*And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God.

Also Romans 6:15-18


6:15What then? shall we sin, because we are not under the law, but under grace? God forbid.

6:16Know ye not, that to whom ye yield yourselves servants to obey, his servants ye are to whom ye obey; whether of sin unto death, or of obedience unto righteousness?

6:17But God be thanked, that ye were the servants of sin, but ye have obeyed from the heart that form of doctrine which was delivered you.

6:18Being then made free from sin, ye became the servants of righteousness.

So repentance is absolutely crucial, and Jesus said God would forgive all manner of sins (except for one). Thank you for sharing your godly insight.

 

[Les Grands Pieds]

In spite of what Les Grands Pieds asserted, it is, as you seemed to be aware, quite possible to become inured to sin. People do indeed "go that far". Judas being the prime example, of course.

Yes, this is true. What I'm trying to say is, it's all in you. The truth is, God still loves you and he still wants to be as involved in your life as he wanted to be before! I never said people are never injured by sin, I simply said that God will still forgive you. You're okay!

I have done messed up stuff, too. The truth is we all do messed up stuff, but we need to realize that God can forgive us. We must always remember to forgive ourselves as well!

Dieu est partout!

 

[paul becke]

Thank you for your words of encouragement, Whitehorse. They are much appreciated, I assure you.

Being unprofitable servants who only do what is required of us, doesn't stop us being human. I've read that flattery is harmless unless you inhale... so I get a buzz, but wouldn't want to luxuriate in it for too long!

 

[paul becke]

I didn't mean it personally, LGP. I'm sure we all know you were speaking from the fulness of your heart.

 

[James Kelley]

well kiddo, you and i are kinda in the same boat, only i havent been suicidal

but yes, i understand what youre going through, about not knowing how to return to god and the like...

ive been struggling with depression for a good few years, an eating disorder for even longer... the depression caused me to go out and search for other alternatives to god, i kinda went through the phase where i wanted to do things on my own, i even went against my parents, i didnt like the idea of my life being controlled, so i thought i could do a better job

no in my boat im kinda stuck in the middle of the ocean without any oars...

if ya ever wanna talk about anything, feel free to drop me a line anytime id be glad t o listen to ya!

 

[James Kelley]

I am there too..unfortunately for myself, i'm 48 yrs old and it's been 35 years. I tried for 2 yrs solid, but the hardening has damned me. I still can't quit smoking and being in constant fear of hell. It's said not to even pray for people like me. That's sad, because I pray for people..All people, especially like me. I just accept i'm gonna burn forever, and my life is horrible.. from the time I open my eyes til I medicate myself to sleep..See I was ocd-bi-polar and went to my counselor and another and another, and the meds they have had me on had clouded and separated my zeal and obedience especially for the word of God had fogged me up so bad, then I stopped taking them at once! Bad idea. I've just been re-leased from my 4th psyche hospital. Everywhere I've read over the years, i'm damned. Heb.6:4-6 ,10 What Peter said about better to have never known, than to have known and left. The gate is small and the path narrow that leads to life. Here in this country? To actually be honest, that we're not selfish with our time especially of which or whom we decide to choose it with, matters, and that, my friend IS what it is all about, your relationship with Christ. I've googled and went to thousands of websites to discredit the bible, it's authenticity, the bioars.ble, and I have found proof that alot of it is made up. But..I'm not trying to diswade your faith so, I discourage that..I'm in a row boat in the middle of the ocean somewhere near Antarctica, and no oars.. i just hope nobody ends up in hell like I am.

 

[paul becke]

Ask yourself how you would judge a person that suffered your trials and felt the same way as you do. It is unlikely to say the least that you would be more merciful towards that person than Jesus would be.

You suffer from what Catholics call 'scruples'. When a lad with scruples confessed to him, St Philip Neri told him to run round the block as his penance ; what's more I'm sure it's not as daft as it sounds, for lesser problems than you've had.

How can you think straight wnhen you're drugged up and then repeatedly suffered withdrawal ? Your minds possibly even been somewhat adversely affected permanently.