busted

[aperfectsonnet]

I need your guys' prayer. i feel like too much is hitting me at once and im going to get knocked over and trampled but im determined to stand my ground. Im going through a break up which is petty and stupid and trivial and my brain knows that, but my heart wont move on. we dated for 4 years. im trying so hard not to be angry at myself for not being stronger because i know i dont deserve the anger. my brain knows all the encouraging words. im smart enough to know what to do, but my heart knows otherwise and i cant get it to follow.

and now the main reason for my prayer request. my mom and her boyfriend were busted with weed last year. she told me last night and i just looked at her and walked away. ive never been so dissapointed and embarrassed in my life. she followed me to try to explain. i didnt need an explanation. nothing she could say could change my mind. ive never done any drug in my life so maybe i have no sympathy for her but i like it that way. she told me she was more scared to tell me than she was her own father. she didnt want to let me down. i felt like i was talking to a child. i told her to grow up, shes 40 years old, not 20. i cant even look at her the same. i love my mom to death and i want to forgive her but my respect for this family has been shot out the window. in high school people would ask me to steal it from my parents and sell it to them. right. becuase im that cool. im surprised and proud that i turned out the way that i am. but im also angry. i dont want to be angry. i need guidance and love and life. i need christian friends. i need parents who are grown up. i feel like im falling apart. i read in the bible about patience last night and it made me feel really good. i need more of that good feeling.

i need, prayers.

help, i love you guys..

-natasha

 

[Cat59]

natasha



praying for you that you don't feel so overwhelmed
and for good friends to come your way and support you in the way you need

Cat

 

[wvmtnkid]

Natasha-

's for you! I am so sorry you are going through such a rough time right now. It seems in some way you are the parent and your mom is the child. I just pray that your faith will get you through and that you know that you can lean on Jesus during this time for strength and guidance. He is faithful-he will never leave you are forsake you.

Oh, what the heck-here's another !

 

[aperfectsonnet]

Thanks for the prayers. im still working at it and still having problems but as days go by i think it gets better

 

[Mr.Cheese]

Hey girl.
A breakup after 4 years isn't a petty thing to move on past. That's gonna take some time to get past. But it will come with time, one day at a time.

The deal with your mom sucks. Maybe getting busted will make her grow up some.

Some of the wisest words I've ever heard were from a Christian personality named Tony Campolo. He said that everyone will let you down at some point in your life cause we're all human. Even our parents.
*hug*
Hang in there.

 

[aperfectsonnet]

thanks for the prayers also im a big fan of "everyone will let you down at some point in your life because we're all human." too often i forget that and assume people are perfect but expect forgiveness knowing im not perfect. I'll work on that.

Much love
natasha