I grew up with domestic violence. From my earliest memories of my childhood, I remember my parents fighting, and how scared I always was.
My father is an alcoholic, and often became violent after hours of drinking.
I spent many years living in fear that I would come home from school one day and find my mother dead. As a child, I spent many nights crying myself to sleep, afraid of what tomorrow would bring. My mother became depressed and emotionally detached from us...she could not be the mother we needed. We had to learn how to take care of ourselves. When I was 15 years old, my mother left one day without warning, and never came back. She left us 4 kids with my dad, who became even more violent after she left. My dad soon kicked us older kids out of the house in a drunken rage, and we went to stay with some friends. I soon found my mom, but she did not want us, and I asked her to emancipate me at 16, because I could not go back to the life I had. But I did go back to the life I had... in the relationships that I became involved in...I got into relationships with men, who were like my father. The abuse I seen happen to my mom, was now happening to me. I have failed marriages because of abuse. I spent many years feeling like I had no worth. I felt betrayal, rejection, guilt and shame over what happened in my life. I had no self-esteem for years. I never knew peace. I felt so abandoned and alone. I never really knew any stability in my life and I always felt as if no one really loved me or wanted me. I was so use to abuse being a part of my life, that I lost any hope of ever being freed from it...and I didn't know how to get freed from it. It all seemed hopeless for a long time. The hardest thing to deal with was feeling like I failed God. I never thought God would accept me after all I had been through and done, and I felt so unworthy to even be in church. And I tried to deal with it all on my own. It took a long time for me to realize that I needed Him, that I could not go on any longer the way I was...and one day I cried out to the Lord with all my heart, and I cried and cried until I had no tears left.
God picked me up, right there, just as I was, all broken and bruised, and He accepted me into His loving arms. It was then, that I committed my life to Him, and I knew in that moment that I never wanted to be without Him again ....I love Him with all my heart. All I want now is to follow Him and serve Him. How great is His love for us, that when we have went our own way, He never stops loving us. That when we come back to Him, His arms are always open, ready to embrace us. I spent many years wondering where God was when I went through all the abuse and pain in my life. And I realized He had been there all along.
God never left me, He was always there.
He had been waiting all that time with outstretched arms for me to turn to Him for the love and healing that I so desperately needed. Because I was so hurt and devastated over what happened in my life, I was not able to see that I could not start healing without Him. The Lord is greater than any pain I could ever endure, and He brought healing into my heart that was so broken and scarred by the years of pain. For the first time in my life, I had peace and joy... God had given me love, peace and joy in my heart!!!
I had finally found what love and acceptance really feels like. God loves me...He really loves me... and I couldn't feel more loved. His love for me is enough. HIS LOVE HAS TRANSFORMED MY LIFE.
I know GOD isn't finished with me yet!!! I know God is going to use what has happened to me to help reach others who are lost and hurting. I have felt very strongly about getting involved in a ministry that helps abused women and children. I want them to know that Jesus is there for them, that He loves them so much... that through Him, they can be set free too!
The Lord has blessed me with wonderful people that He has brought into my life along the way....I feel like God is loving me through them. He has been so good to me!!!
I give GOD all the Praise, Honor and Glory... for all that I am...all that I will be... for everything He has done for me. I praise Him for my new life in Him. He is everything to me.
Jesus Christ has set me free, indeed!
In God's love, Jamey
Two days after I finished writing the above story, I took my 6-year-old son to the doctors. Thinking he probably had a virus, they sent us home. That afternoon I was waiting to pick up my other kids from school when my son had a seizure in our car. I had no idea of what to do, and I started to panic. (My kids attend a school where there was no school nurse on staff.)
After I had sent my oldest son to get help, a woman who happened to be a nurse ran up to my vehicle and took care of my son until the ambulance arrived. Another woman came up to me and asked if she could pray for my son and I said, "Yes"; so she prayed for him. Then another woman who also happened to be a nurse came and helped. These women were at the school picking up their kids too. I was so grateful that these women where willing to come forward to help. My son was admitted to a pediatric intensive care unit due to a serious illness, which was causing seizures. My son's health is now going well but this was an extremely hard time for me having already lost my oldest child almost two years before in a house fire. I am so thankful that God responded to my cries for help and sent the three women to help me during my son's seizure.
God shapes and refines us through trials and sufferings.
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance" (James 1:2).
"All kinds of trials have come so that your faith - of greater worth than gold ... may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed" (1 Peter 1:6,7).
God is helping me through each of the struggles in my life and He is shaping my character in His image in the process. God has done so many beautiful things and I look forward to more beautiful things ahead. If you go through some dark moments in your life please remember that God is there with you. Even if you don't understand all that is happening to you, keep trusting in the Lord to see you through. People may abandon us, hurt us, reject us, betray us, but God never will. Draw on God 's strength and forgiveness and move on to the exciting things God has in store for you.
My father is an alcoholic, and often became violent after hours of drinking.
I spent many years living in fear that I would come home from school one day and find my mother dead. As a child, I spent many nights crying myself to sleep, afraid of what tomorrow would bring. My mother became depressed and emotionally detached from us...she could not be the mother we needed. We had to learn how to take care of ourselves. When I was 15 years old, my mother left one day without warning, and never came back. She left us 4 kids with my dad, who became even more violent after she left. My dad soon kicked us older kids out of the house in a drunken rage, and we went to stay with some friends. I soon found my mom, but she did not want us, and I asked her to emancipate me at 16, because I could not go back to the life I had. But I did go back to the life I had... in the relationships that I became involved in...I got into relationships with men, who were like my father. The abuse I seen happen to my mom, was now happening to me. I have failed marriages because of abuse. I spent many years feeling like I had no worth. I felt betrayal, rejection, guilt and shame over what happened in my life. I had no self-esteem for years. I never knew peace. I felt so abandoned and alone. I never really knew any stability in my life and I always felt as if no one really loved me or wanted me. I was so use to abuse being a part of my life, that I lost any hope of ever being freed from it...and I didn't know how to get freed from it. It all seemed hopeless for a long time. The hardest thing to deal with was feeling like I failed God. I never thought God would accept me after all I had been through and done, and I felt so unworthy to even be in church. And I tried to deal with it all on my own. It took a long time for me to realize that I needed Him, that I could not go on any longer the way I was...and one day I cried out to the Lord with all my heart, and I cried and cried until I had no tears left.
God picked me up, right there, just as I was, all broken and bruised, and He accepted me into His loving arms. It was then, that I committed my life to Him, and I knew in that moment that I never wanted to be without Him again ....I love Him with all my heart. All I want now is to follow Him and serve Him. How great is His love for us, that when we have went our own way, He never stops loving us. That when we come back to Him, His arms are always open, ready to embrace us. I spent many years wondering where God was when I went through all the abuse and pain in my life. And I realized He had been there all along.
God never left me, He was always there.
He had been waiting all that time with outstretched arms for me to turn to Him for the love and healing that I so desperately needed. Because I was so hurt and devastated over what happened in my life, I was not able to see that I could not start healing without Him. The Lord is greater than any pain I could ever endure, and He brought healing into my heart that was so broken and scarred by the years of pain. For the first time in my life, I had peace and joy... God had given me love, peace and joy in my heart!!!
I had finally found what love and acceptance really feels like. God loves me...He really loves me... and I couldn't feel more loved. His love for me is enough. HIS LOVE HAS TRANSFORMED MY LIFE.
I know GOD isn't finished with me yet!!! I know God is going to use what has happened to me to help reach others who are lost and hurting. I have felt very strongly about getting involved in a ministry that helps abused women and children. I want them to know that Jesus is there for them, that He loves them so much... that through Him, they can be set free too!
The Lord has blessed me with wonderful people that He has brought into my life along the way....I feel like God is loving me through them. He has been so good to me!!!
I give GOD all the Praise, Honor and Glory... for all that I am...all that I will be... for everything He has done for me. I praise Him for my new life in Him. He is everything to me.
Jesus Christ has set me free, indeed!
In God's love, Jamey
Two days after I finished writing the above story, I took my 6-year-old son to the doctors. Thinking he probably had a virus, they sent us home. That afternoon I was waiting to pick up my other kids from school when my son had a seizure in our car. I had no idea of what to do, and I started to panic. (My kids attend a school where there was no school nurse on staff.)
After I had sent my oldest son to get help, a woman who happened to be a nurse ran up to my vehicle and took care of my son until the ambulance arrived. Another woman came up to me and asked if she could pray for my son and I said, "Yes"; so she prayed for him. Then another woman who also happened to be a nurse came and helped. These women were at the school picking up their kids too. I was so grateful that these women where willing to come forward to help. My son was admitted to a pediatric intensive care unit due to a serious illness, which was causing seizures. My son's health is now going well but this was an extremely hard time for me having already lost my oldest child almost two years before in a house fire. I am so thankful that God responded to my cries for help and sent the three women to help me during my son's seizure.
God shapes and refines us through trials and sufferings.
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance" (James 1:2).
"All kinds of trials have come so that your faith - of greater worth than gold ... may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed" (1 Peter 1:6,7).
God is helping me through each of the struggles in my life and He is shaping my character in His image in the process. God has done so many beautiful things and I look forward to more beautiful things ahead. If you go through some dark moments in your life please remember that God is there with you. Even if you don't understand all that is happening to you, keep trusting in the Lord to see you through. People may abandon us, hurt us, reject us, betray us, but God never will. Draw on God 's strength and forgiveness and move on to the exciting things God has in store for you.
