Breaking stereotypes

[Catherineanne]

I would like to ask my gay brothers and sisters how many of the stereotypes do they break?

The reason I ask is that I have a gay friend who dresses very badly, has a very messy house, never ever cleans his car and - well, you get the idea. Even he says you can tell a gay house by a certain look, except his does not have it.

His gay friends look around them when they visit and say, 'you cannot possibly be gay!' which makes me laugh.

So, why can you not possibly be gay, or is my friend the only one who breaks the stereotypes?

 

[naotmaa]

I would like to ask my gay brothers and sisters how many of the stereotypes do they break?

The reason I ask is that I have a gay friend who dresses very badly, has a very messy house, never ever cleans his car and - well, you get the idea. Even he says you can tell a gay house by a certain look, except his does not have it.

His gay friends look around them when they visit and say, 'you cannot possibly be gay!' which makes me laugh.

So, why can you not possibly be gay, or is my friend the only one who breaks the stereotypes?

I think every gay person breaks those stereotypes in one way or another. Personally I'm girly. I have longish hair. People don't believe it when they first find out. yeaaah.

 

[FaithLikeARock]

The whole "gay guys are really feminine" is confusing anyway. Isn't the goal to attract guys? Obviously a straight guy isn't going to go for it anyway so should they be acting masculine to attract other gay guys. It just makes no sense.

Really, all the feminine and neat freak guys I know are straight as a lead pipe and all the gay friends I know are pretty normal. (Same with girls. I actually know a lesbian girl who's so pathetically girly.)

 

[Catherineanne]

The whole "gay guys are really feminine" is confusing anyway. Isn't the goal to attract guys? Obviously a straight guy isn't going to go for it anyway so should they be acting masculine to attract other gay guys. It just makes no sense.

Really, all the feminine and neat freak guys I know are straight as a lead pipe and all the gay friends I know are pretty normal. (Same with girls. I actually know a lesbian girl who's so pathetically girly.)

This reminds me of a m to f transexual, who I will call A, who fancied my gay (Male) friend, B. A said to me that she thought that B fancied her, because he had told her that she was far more attractive as a woman than as a man, which is certainly true.

So I said to B, do you really fancy her? He said no, and laughed. Then I said, if you were a gay man fancying a transexual woman, wouldn't that make you straight? And we both laughed then, because it was all so unlikely! (I have more laughs with my male gay friends than with pretty well anyone else.)

I think it is as naotmaa said, that we all break stereotypes. But it is funny to see how meaningless they are, all the same.

 

[Catherineanne]

The whole "gay guys are really feminine" is confusing anyway. Isn't the goal to attract guys? Obviously a straight guy isn't going to go for it anyway so should they be acting masculine to attract other gay guys. It just makes no sense.

Really, all the feminine and neat freak guys I know are straight as a lead pipe and all the gay friends I know are pretty normal. (Same with girls. I actually know a lesbian girl who's so pathetically girly.)

Pretty well the same for me. Of the ones I know only one is obviously gay from his appearance and behaviour. The rest can play camp, but it is not part of who they are most of the time.

Sadly I don't know any lesbians. Not that I know of, anyway. I only know my own women friends, who are pretty well the same as I am, one way or another, and my gay friends.

 

[Zaac]

I would like to ask my gay brothers and sisters how many of the stereotypes do they break?

The reason I ask is that I have a gay friend who dresses very badly, has a very messy house, never ever cleans his car and - well, you get the idea. Even he says you can tell a gay house by a certain look, except his does not have it.

His gay friends look around them when they visit and say, 'you cannot possibly be gay!' which makes me laugh.

So, why can you not possibly be gay, or is my friend the only one who breaks the stereotypes?

I know plenty of guys who just like nice things and having everything in its place.

I know just as many messy folks.

Remarkably, where they fall isn't based upon their orientation.

 

[naotmaa]

I know plenty of guys who just like nice things and having everything in its place.

I know just as many messy folks.

Remarkably, where they fall isn't based upon their orientation.

Exactly. If a gay person likes to be fashionable and neat people think its because he's gay. But if a straight person likes it, its because he likes it .
The truth is that some people like different things regardless of their orientation not because of it.

 

[Apollo Celestio]

Ask anyone in my house, my brother is quite the slob and he happens to be gay. Runs in the family, but he gets it the most. I'm the laziest one.

 

[OllieFranz]

That's why the term "metrosexual" was coined several years ago. It refers to an urbane hetero male who matches all or most of the gay stereotypes.

Similarly there are gays who match, not "gay" stereotypes, but "nerd" stereotypes, "jock" stereotypes, "slob" stereotypes, "gang" stereotypes, etc.

 

[Catholicon]

How many stereotypes to straight people break?

 

[flicka]

How many stereotypes to straight people break?

My husband is a metrosexual. And he has more skin care products than I do.

 

[FaithLikeARock]

My husband is a metrosexual. And he has more skin care products than I do.

Oh wow.

I'm metrosexual. I own more Playstation games than most normal humans, let alone feminine ones.

 

[Catherineanne]

How many stereotypes to straight people break?

I never encountered stereotypes until after my graduation, when I went to live in Greece. All of a sudden, anything I did was because I was a Brit, and was ascribed to that. Not because I was a particular kind of person, but because all Brits were.

It was a very surreal kind of feeling. At home I am unique and not like anyone else. Abroad, I am just one of the herd of Brits abroad.

 

[Ohioprof]

I break stereotypes because I am a mother, and people don't expect lesbians to be motherly. I am neither butch nor femme. I'm just in between. I suppose I am a bit of a nerd, but that's acceptable in a professor. People don't mind that I am a bit clumsy and absent-minded, because that's a stereotype of professors. I wish I weren't clumsy, though, because this sprained ankle has been a real drag.

I don't think I look middle-aged, but that may be an illusion on my part, as I am well into middle age. I am still energetic, and I'm very happy.

 

[Catherineanne]

I break stereotypes because I am a mother, and people don't expect lesbians to be motherly. I am neither butch nor femme. I'm just in between. I suppose I am a bit of a nerd, but that's acceptable in a professor. People don't mind that I am a bit clumsy and absent-minded, because that's a stereotype of professors. I wish I weren't clumsy, though, because this sprained ankle has been a real drag.

I don't think I look middle-aged, but that may be an illusion on my part, as I am well into middle age. I am still energetic, and I'm very happy.

I don't know much about lesbians, I am sorry to say. But I get very annoyed at the usual butch:femme portrayal on television, which is only broken by the male fantasy femme:femme version, with nubile actors who are very clearly chosen for their attraction to men.

(I only look middle aged first thing in the morning, before my first cup of tea. )

I am sorry about your ankle, O.