Bored with Christianity

[Thir7ySev3n]

Having been a Christian for about ten years I'm now bored with the whole thing. What advice can people offer?

I was brought up as a Buddhist but became increasing disillusioned, became interested in whether God existed. I began praying, reading the Bible and attending church.

Now though I am over the whole thing. When I became a Christian I had no friends and my life was fairly pointless. Now though I have a network of friends, I have a social life and a permanent job that I enjoy. I am much more self confident, and am doing things I was previously afraid to do.

In the midst of this Christianity is simply less relevant, I have other things far more fun and interesting to do.

Of course you will be wondering why I don't simply leave. Unfortunately i live with relatives who are Christian so leaving the church would create difficulties, so I am stuck, paying lip service to something that no longer moves me. Of course I did this for years when I was a Buddhist, but I was younger then, and I hate the thought of wasting more of my life living a lie.

What do you advise?

"And as for what fell among the thorns, they are those who hear, but as they go on their way they are choked by the cares and riches and pleasures of life, and their fruit does not mature." (Luke 8:14)

What you had was a false profession. You need to be a good soil hearer like what Jesus described after:

"As for that in the good soil, they are those who, hearing the word, hold it fast in an honest and good heart, and bear fruit with patience." (Luke 8:15)

As Jesus also said:

"For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul?"..."The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God is at hand; repent and believe in the gospel." (Matthew 16:26, Mark 1:15)

 

[Ananda B.]

Eternal life is very relevant, that is what God offers through Christianity. God does not say we can't have friends, or can't have a life. But you need to think soberly "for what does it benefit you if you gain the whole world but loose your soul".

""for what does it benefit you if you gain the whole world but loose your soul". Yes, that is where Pascal's Wager is useful. Thank you for the reminder! I have been, quite deliberatly, making sure that I pray even when I don't feel close to God. KBO!

 

[Ananda B.]

You don't speak about your faith and how you lost it. This doesn't sound to me as if you ever were a real Christian.


If your relatives are acting in the love of Christ, they will certainly try to persuade you not to leave, but they will not create real difficulties for you.


Again, I get the impression that you never sought God, but only human relationship, social life etc. (if I'm mistaken about this, please forgive me, but this is my impression).

From a pure Christian point of view, it is better to stand to one's convictions than to be a hypocrite. Jesus rebuked the pious, but rather hypocritical, Pharisees stronger than anyone else.

Leave, and ask your relatives to pray for you. If they are better Christians than you were, they will let you go. And I hope that you will find Jesus. Maybe not tomorrow, but if you ever need help no man can give to you, remember that he will receive you with arms wide open.

EDIT: After reading other postings and your answers, I want to say that I will, of course, enjoy if you stay being a Christian, provided, of course, if this is sincere (sincerely searching at first) and not "hiding your thoughts".

"You don't speak about your faith and how you lost it. This doesn't sound to me as if you ever were a real Christian."

Regarding loss of faith, it is something I try not to think about as the wound is still raw. In 2017 Australia had a plebiscite on same sex marriage, I had been planning to vote ‘yes’ and had joined a group for conservative yes supporters, to whom I donated. I then prayed on the matter and got very strong feeling that God wanted me to vote ‘no.’ So I voted ‘no,’ donated to the ‘no’ campaign and publicly changed my views, which cost me friends. Then the no case not only lost but lost by a significant margin (60% ‘yes’ / 40% ‘no’). I was furious, I had lost friends, money, had voted against my own interests and had been left looking a fool. Had God told me ‘The ‘no’ case will lose, but I want you to stand on principal and support them’ that would have been one thing (after all to defend a hopeless cause out of loyalty is nothing to be ashamed of) but He simply used me and then dumped me. My stomach still churns with fury and grief when I think of this.... ever since I have been veering between ‘God does not exist’ and ‘so this is what God is really like.’ I am sorry if this offends you but a sincere question deserves an honest answer.

 

[Helmut-WK]

I fear I cannot give you a helpful answer, but you should know that I read your post ...

ever since I have been veering between ‘God does not exist’ and ‘so this is what God is really like.’

"So this is what God is really like" is the better reaction.
In the Bible you find text from people who thought like this, most prominent is Job, you may also find one in the Psalms.

Of course, they were not in Your situation (there were no plebiscites or the like in those times), so I don't know how much of their words you can apply to you. But one thing is clear: You should tell God what you feel and what you think, this is what those people did. Look into Job: When reading from start to end, you might expect that God, after interfering at last, will say something like: Job, you disappointed me, why did you not listen to how your friends tried to show you the right way? But (presumly you know it) the end is different ...

If this doesn't help you, forget it and listen to others. I tried my best and I feel it is not good enough.

 

[paul1149]

Dear Ananda,

Thanks for sharing that. I think your boredom is at root due to turning away from an unresolved wound to what was a dynamic faith.

I wouldn't be able to speak to the specifics of what happened without getting into more detail. But in general I would say that it's not good to hinge your faith on one experience. It seems like you thought you were supposed to go against your conscience on that occasion. Sometimes our conscience is indeed misinformed, but it's a dangerous thing to violate it without confirmation or better understanding. "At the mouth of two or three witness shall all things be established".

I was in a seriously confusing situation years ago that stumbled me big time. I walked away for a season but I knew there was nothing in the world for me. God was faithful and eventually I came back. The best I can tell you is not to make rash moves away from God when things don't seem to make sense. Either He had a deeper purpose in what you did that hasn't come to light yet, or you weren't hearing accurately. Give Him the benefit of the doubt and time to work it out for you. Be honest with Him but keep seeking His wisdom and understanding.

Therefore do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise: -Heb 10:35-36​

 

[Albion]

"He simply used me and then dumped me. My stomach still churns with fury and grief when I think of this.... ever since I have been veering between ‘God does not exist’ and ‘so this is what God is really like.’ I am sorry if this offends you but a sincere question deserves an honest answer. You don't speak about your faith and how you lost it. This doesn't sound to me as if you ever were a real Christian."

Personally, I cannot buy any of that analysis about God tricking you. It is just as easy to think that God persuaded you to do the right thing, win or lose.

That is what we always say our faith leads us to do in other interpersonal relationships. We never think that it has to work to our advantage.

No, we know that doing right is its own reward or at least that we have an obligation to stand with Godly principles come what may.

 

[Ananda B.]

I fear I cannot give you a helpful answer, but you should know that I read your post ...

"So this is what God is really like" is the better reaction.
In the Bible you find text from people who thought like this, most prominent is Job, you may also find one in the Psalms.

Of course, they were not in Your situation (there were no plebiscites or the like in those times), so I don't know how much of their words you can apply to you. But one thing is clear: You should tell God what you feel and what you think, this is what those people did. Look into Job: When reading from start to end, you might expect that God, after interfering at last, will say something like: Job, you disappointed me, why did you not listen to how your friends tried to show you the right way? But (presumly you know it) the end is different ...

If this doesn't help you, forget it and listen to others. I tried my best and I feel it is not good enough.

Thank you for that, as a matter of fact I am feeling much happier today (after a sleepless night worrying about this), I realized this morning that if cutting God out of my life leaves me bored, dissillisioned etc that is actually evidence that God exists (after all how can I feel unhappy if I am angry at someone who does not exist? That would be lioke being angry with the Easter bunny). The other point is that I did do what God wanted me to do (or at least what I believed He wanted me to do), think of Abraham. The mistake I made was that I did not take this up with God at the time (after all He knows more than me) and that I then went away and sulked. Lastly I made the mistake of thinking that God was like a politician who would rig votes, strong-arm electors etc to get the vote he wanted. I'm glad I posted here, this diolog has made things far clearer. Thank you for your advice. God bless!

 

[Ananda B.]

Dear Ananda,

Thanks for sharing that. I think your boredom is at root due to turning away from an unresolved wound to what was a dynamic faith.

I wouldn't be able to speak to the specifics of what happened without getting into more detail. But in general I would say that it's not good to hinge your faith on one experience. It seems like you thought you were supposed to go against your conscience on that occasion. Sometimes our conscience is indeed misinformed, but it's a dangerous thing to violate it without confirmation or better understanding. "At the mouth of two or three witness shall all things be established".

I was in a seriously confusing situation years ago that stumbled me big time. I walked away for a season but I knew there was nothing in the world for me. God was faithful and eventually I came back. The best I can tell you is not to make rash moves away from God when things don't seem to make sense. Either He had a deeper purpose in what you did that hasn't come to light yet, or you weren't hearing accurately. Give Him the benefit of the doubt and time to work it out for you. Be honest with Him but keep seeking His wisdom and understanding.

Therefore do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise: -Heb 10:35-36​

Thank you for your thoughts, please see my comment below that if cutting God out of my life has made me unhappy that is evidence that God actually exists. Of course it is foolish to hinge my faith on one experience (particularly as I should have talked me to God at the time, instead of going off and doing the spiritual equivelent of closing my eyes, putting my fingers in my ears and saying 'I'm not going to talk to you again!). 'The best I can tell you is not to make rash moves away from God when things don't seem to make sense. Either He had a deeper purpose in what you did that hasn't come to light yet, or you weren't hearing accurately. Give Him the benefit of the doubt and time to work it out for you. Be honest with Him but keep seeking His wisdom and understanding.' Wonderful advice, as C. S. Lewis says 'He is not a tame lion."

 

[Ananda B.]

Personally, I cannot buy any of that analysis about God tricking you. It is just as easy to think that God persuaded you to do the right thing, win or lose.

That is what we always say our faith leads us to do in other interpersonal relationships. We never think that it has to work to our advantage.

No, we know that doing right is its own reward or at least that we have an obligation to stand with Godly principles come what may.

A mistake I made was to think of God as a canny politician who would strong arm voters, rig ballots etc to get what he wanted. Of course that was very foolish because a) would a God who is, in essence, a politician be worth our worship (think Wotan in Wagner's 'Ring Cycle,' always the operator)? and b) if God was like that how could I complain if he 'tricked me?' I should have talked to God about this, and approached other Christians, instead of sitting in a corner getting angry and loosing faith. There is a lesson here. Thank you.

 

[paul1149]

Ananda, it sounds like you're doing much better, and I'm happy for that. It's very hard to get let down or even smacked in the face spiritually when we think we've done everything as we ought. I still don't have all the answers regarding my situation, but wrestling with it has added to my understanding and maturity. It's not about me after all.

If necessary, it's ok to acknowledge a little anger now and then, while maintaining respect, as part of the process of working through it. God is gracious and kind and can handle it. The important thing is to stay focused on Him, in faith that in time He will show us what we need and bring us through to higher ground.

 

[Ananda B.]

Much happier, thank you, not surprizing as a was not only cutting myself off from God but also hiding from myself why I was alienated. Thank you very much for your (and everybody else’s) advice. As you say ‘I still don't have all the answers regarding my situation, but wrestling with it has added to my understanding and maturity. It's not about me after all.’ I will be praying for you and hope that you will remember me in your prayers.


Last night I read the Book of Job (in the Moffet translation), amazing how different the Bible is when you are being open to God. I will be interesting to see how church goes, again I suspect it will be a different experience.


Regarding ‘Job,’ it is interesting that this is one of the few places in the Bible where we get to see ‘behind the scenes,’ the only comparable passage I can think of is in Luke 10.18.

 

[lastofall]

Faith comes only and exclusively by hearing the Word of God, which is submitting to and relying upon God's Word: if therefore we lack faith, then we must needs more abundantly hear the Word of God. As for being disinterested with the Lord Jesus Christ, such an mind is yet unbelieving.

 

[paul1149]

I will be praying for you and hope that you will remember me in your prayers.

Thank you so much. I would really appreciate your prayers and will definitely be praying for you. I think your breakthrough has already begun.

As for Job, several places in the Bible give glimpses behind the scenes, though some of them are quite oblique. You can check out the work of Michael Heiser on youtube, who has done extensive study on this. Quite challenging.

 

[BNR32FAN]

Having been a Christian for about ten years I'm now bored with the whole thing. What advice can people offer?

I was brought up as a Buddhist but became increasing disillusioned, became interested in whether God existed. I began praying, reading the Bible and attending church.

Now though I am over the whole thing. When I became a Christian I had no friends and my life was fairly pointless. Now though I have a network of friends, I have a social life and a permanent job that I enjoy. I am much more self confident, and am doing things I was previously afraid to do.

In the midst of this Christianity is simply less relevant, I have other things far more fun and interesting to do.

Of course you will be wondering why I don't simply leave. Unfortunately i live with relatives who are Christian so leaving the church would create difficulties, so I am stuck, paying lip service to something that no longer moves me. Of course I did this for years when I was a Buddhist, but I was younger then, and I hate the thought of wasting more of my life living a lie.

What do you advise?

To me it sounds like you may have been pressured into Christianity by the relatives your living with but have not yet been called by God. It is possible that God has put you here to reveal the gospel to you in order to plant seeds in your heart but has not yet backed you into a corner where the only way out is thru Him. It sounds like you’ve received many blessings. Don’t be surprised if things get tough later down the road as He begins to work on calling you to Himself.

 

[aiki]

Having been a Christian for about ten years I'm now bored with the whole thing. What advice can people offer?

"Thing"? God is a thing? Interesting. This way of thinking about God may be a big part of why you find Christianity boring. Really, your remark here suggests very strongly to me that you aren't, in fact, a Christian. One does not get bored with the Creator of the Universe if one truly know Him.

I was brought up as a Buddhist but became increasing disillusioned, became interested in whether God existed. I began praying, reading the Bible and attending church.

Does going to a hospital and reading a medical manual make you a surgeon? No. Likewise, one is not a Christian merely because one has attended a church and read the Bible.

Now though I am over the whole thing. When I became a Christian I had no friends and my life was fairly pointless. Now though I have a network of friends, I have a social life and a permanent job that I enjoy. I am much more self confident, and am doing things I was previously afraid to do.

And not a single mention of your experience of God here. Telling, I think. It seems you embraced the form of Christianity but not its heart. No wonder you're "over it." You never had "it" (that is, God) to begin with.

In the midst of this Christianity is simply less relevant, I have other things far more fun and interesting to do.

A very consumerist approach to religion. Very self-centered. And totally missing the core of the Christian faith.

Of course you will be wondering why I don't simply leave. Unfortunately i live with relatives who are Christian so leaving the church would create difficulties, so I am stuck, paying lip service to something that no longer moves me. Of course I did this for years when I was a Buddhist, but I was younger then, and I hate the thought of wasting more of my life living a lie.

What do you advise?

How about actually coming to know God personally through Christ? How about actually experiencing real Christianity rather than the shallow, pointless going-through-the-motions version of the faith you've tried so far?

 

[Ananda B.]

Great morning at church. It is amazing how your perspective changes once you decide to seek to mend bridges with Christ! Thank you to everyone who has provided advice and prayers!

 

[Ananda B.]

"Thing"? God is a thing? Interesting. This way of thinking about God may be a big part of why you find Christianity boring. Really, your remark here suggests very strongly to me that you aren't, in fact, a Christian. One does not get bored with the Creator of the Universe if one truly know Him.



Does going to a hospital and reading a medical manual make you a surgeon? No. Likewise, one is not a Christian merely because one has attended a church and read the Bible.



And not a single mention of your experience of God here. Telling, I think. It seems you embraced the form of Christianity but not its heart. No wonder you're "over it." You never had "it" (that is, God) to begin with.



A very consumerist approach to religion. Very self-centered. And totally missing the core of the Christian faith.



How about actually coming to know God personally through Christ? How about actually experiencing real Christianity rather than the shallow, pointless going-through-the-motions version of the faith you've tried so far?

Thanks for your comment, there were a lot more issues than simply ‘boredom,’ most importantly I was very angry with God but not willing or able to acknowledge that. If you read the discussions above you will get the full picture. God bless!