Book Recommendations, Please

[LynzLovedByCHRIST]

Most of you now know the things that I am concerned about and am dealing with in my relationship with Joe. However, I was wondering if you have some book recommendations for me that could help me/us/him out. I ask that they please be reliable and by Christian authors only. If they've helped you out, too, please explain how!

Thanks ya'll,
Lynz

 

[SarahAblaze06]

Well, I haven't been on the boards lately so I don't know your problems, but I do know of many great general christian books in the area of romance... a wonderful book that is very very popular is a book called The 5 love languages. This can be founf in most major bookstores and probly all christian bookstores. It's great for giving advice on how to please another person, most of all helping you to understand your partners way of communicating, especially communicating affection. Now if it's in the pre/sexual department some good books could include, every man's battle or every woman's battle. they are both good books to read no matter what and they will give you lots of insight to how the other person and more clearly how you deal with the most intimate parts of yourself. Let me go read some more of the boards and I'll try to find more helpful books.

 

[invisiblebabe]

thats not rocket science

Considering one of my best friends is actually a rocket scientist (no joke, he's got a degree in aerospace engineering and is currently interning at NASA), that expression always makes me laugh

As for book recommendations...

Concerning purity and such, I actually read too much on it when I was younger and became a purity Nazi. lol

Concerning personality and communication, I highly recommend Please Understand Me II by David Keirsey.

 

[KristianJ]

I dont have a book rec. right now (I'll take a look tomorrow) but I just wanted to say this: To be honest I think the main problems you are having are in the communication department, and thus I think you really have to widen your "criteria" for books you'd read from Christian authors to "all" authors.

There are plenty of good reputable books and authors out there that are secular that can give you great advice on communication issues. The Godly part you can put in yourself, thats not rocket science

Just because they aren't Christian authors doesn't mean they don't have great advice.. and just because they MAY be Christian authors doesn't even mean they will talk about God, spirituality, religion, etc. in their books at all depending on the subject.

You can't judge a book by its cover Couldn't resist.. heh

~ ~

Seconded - particularly with communication, you don't need to restrict yourself to Christian literature. Unfortunately I don't have any secular recommendations, but I think that given the nature of communication as something essential to one's everyday life and not focussed on a courting relationship, anything by Dr Phil or someone similar in secular circles could be as good as something by James Dobson or the like in Christian circles. If I think of any books, I'll post them later

 

[InTheFlame]

Boundaries in Dating - Drs Cloud and Townsend

Five Love Languages - Gary Chapman

Fit To Be Tied - (can't remember)

Love Must Be Tough - Dobson

 

[KristianJ]

Fit To Be Tied - (can't remember)

Bill and Lynne Hybels, I think...

 

[LynzLovedByCHRIST]

Thanks for the ones you've recommended so far. I'll be sure to check some of them out soon.
And, Blue, I don't usually "judge a book by its cover" . Just that I'd prefer the author to be Christian because that's what kind of guidance, advice, and help I'm wanting and needing.

 

[f U z ! o N]

hrm i also say Five Love Languages. It deals with communication for love.
also, what areas of communication are you having trouble with?

 

[LynzLovedByCHRIST]

Alright you guys, I purchased The Five Love Languages on Wednesday and finished reading it yesterday. It was extremely interesting, and I think it holds a lot of truth too.

According to the profile in the back, my love language is Quality Time, and I agree. Physical Touch (no, not sex of course- just holding my hand or an arm around my shoulders) and Receiving Gifts are also important to me in feeling loved.

However I am having a hard time figuring out what his love language is. But I don't think his primary one is receiving gifts, since he rarely gives me anything except for on a special occasion, like birthday, Christmas, etc.

Since we aren't married, I'm not sure if we should try the strategy that Dr. Chapman suggests.

I would actually like to bring this up with him tonight. Do you have any suggestions, especially since he knows nothing about me getting the book and reading it? Should I ask him to read it? Or could I maybe ask him to tell me what I do that makes him feel loved- which was what I thought of at first. I appreciate your suggestions!

Lynz

 

[f U z ! o N]

make him take the quiz first!

 

[LynzLovedByCHRIST]

Ok, thanks, sounds good

 

[WhenFinallySetFree777]

Two books that have completely transformed my relationship with God and others are Wild at Heart by John Eldredge and Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge. The former is about how males - not just men, but boys too - operate based on how they were created. The latter is the same for women and girls. Read them both, and find out how not only your heart, but your boyfriend's and every other male's heart works. These books don't deal with rules, complicated theology, quizzes, etc. They speak directly to the romantic heart gave to every person and how that heart relates based on gender. They deal with everything from emotional scars given to children by parents to relationships with your spouse - not to mention your relationship with God.

 

[LynzLovedByCHRIST]

Those sound good, thanks.