Blond joke

[AHH who-stole-my-name]

A blond teenage girl, wanting to earn some extra money for the summer, decided to hire herself out as a 'handy-woman' and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.

'Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch,' he said. 'How much will you charge me?'

Delighted, the girl quickly responded, 'How about $50?'

The man agreed and told her that the paint brushes and everything she would need was in the garage. The man's wife, hearing the conversation said to her husband, 'Does she realize that our porch goes ALL the way around the house?'

He responded, 'That's a bit cynical, isn't it?'

The wife replied, 'You're right. I guess I'm starting to believe all those dumb blonde jokes'

Later that day, the blond came to the door to collect her money.

'You're finished already?' the startled husband asked.

'Yes,' the blonde replied, 'and I even had paint left over, so I gave it two coats.'

Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50.00 and handed it to her along with a ten dollar tip.

'And by the way,' the blond added, 'it's not a Porch, it's a Lexus."

 

[AHH who-stole-my-name]

One night, a burglar broke into a house . He was shining his flashlight
around when a voice in the dark said, "Jesus knows you're here."

He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze.

Hearing nothing more, he shook his head and continued.

Just as he started pulling the stereo out to disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard, "Jesus is watching you!"

Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice.

Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.

"Did you say that?" he whispered
to the parrot.

"Yes," the parrot replied, and
then added, "I'm Just trying to warn you that he is
watching you."

The burglar replied. "Warn me,
Who are you ?"

"Moses,"
replied the bird.

"Moses?" the burglar laughed.
"What kind of people would name a bird
Moses?"

"The kind of people that would name a
Rottweiler Jesus."

 

[AtTheBeachInTheSun]

lol

 

[Seek.1st]

Typo in a church's bulletin:

"Are we too blond to see?"

 

[Tyler Herrin]

lol

 

[myfarah]

blond jokes always funny

 

[chris4243]

[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the Loan officer. She says she's going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.

The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Mercedes Benz SL 500.

The car is parked on the street in front of the bank, she has the title and everything checks out. The bank agrees to accept the car collateral for the loan.

The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the blond for using a $110,000 Benz as collateral against a $5,000 loan.

An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive the Benz into the bank's underground garage and parks it there. Two weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest, which comes to $15.41.

The loan officer says, "Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire.

What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"

The blonde replies, "Where else in New York City can I park my Car for two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return?"[/FONT]