Better Communication

[jewie]

Hi Everyone

I'm very new to this forum, but I would really like some feedback on what Good Communication is in Christian Relationships with your partner.

All of us go through different Storms and challenges in everyday life and I am interested to learn more from others about how to communicate with your partner during those tougher times and in those good times, how to support each other through the struggles. Examples would be good too- and I'm sure there are so many different topics and situations that could be discussed about Communication ......

 

[Beauty4Ashes]

praying, being honest and allowing the other person to be honest. I have much to learn myself. However I've found that being able to talk about everything and be open is super important. It's not good to hold stuff inside,for the most part. Of course it takes effort and trust to do this.



....just thought I"d bump your thread for you.

 

[PinkSpider]

The most important part of communication is talking about the bad things. Generally, it's easy to talk about what we like about other people, and what we've done good. But the most important thing, especially if you're in a long term relationship, is talking about those things you're ashamed to talk about, or the things you're afraid will make your partner angry. It's scary, and not particularly easy to do, but in the end it'll bring you both closer together in trust and honesty.

and just never forget that secrets can quickly turn into lies.

 

[ImperialPhantom]

OP: So what's your exact question?

 

[cawcaw908]

Honesty, an being open is very key. Before God came into my life I was not good at all. With my gf now she has heard everything from back then and i have been compltly honest with her about all of it and she has forgiven me for my past and a allowed me to show her that I have changed so much with Jesus in my life. She saw that I did in fact change and it has grown our relationship leaps and bounds just by being open trusting honest and communicating about anything and everything. And likePinkSpider stated it is alot about the bad things. I am able to back that up because my life was pretty much nothing but bad and we talked about it all. And if your partner sees your trying to communicate and so fourth they will do the same.

 

[JCFantasy23]

Communication IS essential for a positive relationship. In my experience though, and after speaking to girlfriends, males, and reading books such as Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus...*grin*...men seem to close up more when things get rough and distance themselves. Sometimes they're talkative but it usually seems women have to be creative in this area to keep the communication flowing easily.

 

[Beauty4Ashes]

Communication IS essential for a positive relationship. In my experience though, and after speaking to girlfriends, males, and reading books such as Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus...*grin*...men seem to close up more when things get rough and distance themselves. Sometimes they're talkative but it usually seems women have to be creative in this area to keep the communication flowing easily.

I agree with this. I think its important for men to share what's on their mind and talk things through with their partner at all times, especially when things get tough. Distancing ones self will happen otherwise and that is not healthy and also not honest. Because you are not in a relationship with yourself but with another person and it's important that you talk through things together and don't keep things from one another. I think it is a learning process. It does seem as though women may be more inclined to turn to verbal communication to work through things as a first resort whereas men sometimes forget how essential that is. But I think women can do the same thing actually. I know I have. So hopefully at least one partner is able to encourage the other towards being open and honest and not shutting the other person out.

 

[eatenbylocusts]

Communication IS essential for a positive relationship. In my experience though, and after speaking to girlfriends, males, and reading books such as Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus...*grin*...men seem to close up more when things get rough and distance themselves. Sometimes they're talkative but it usually seems women have to be creative in this area to keep the communication flowing easily.

Men sometimes need their "cave" time where they process the problem by themselves.

 

[Beauty4Ashes]

Men sometimes need their "cave" time where they process the problem by themselves.

yea there is some truth in that I think. As long as they dont stay in that cave too long.

 

[kl_lorent]

Really? I feel like I need "cave" time more than my husband does. I need time to be alone and think things through before I can explain them. This past week has been rough for our communication because what I say he ends up taking a different way. That's the most frustrating thing, we aren't in each other's heads so I never know if he is hearing what I am really saying and vise versa. Anybody have any advice for how they handle this? We're going to try to sit down and explain what we're hearing and what we're meaning to say before a fight breaks out next time, it's so hard to fix though.