Before I come here....

[wingcross]

Before I come to this forum, I was in depression too. I went to see my Pastor. I have no choice, my phone ran out of credits, I cant contact him. I shouted, he cant hear. I climb over the gate.

I Call him. He know me very well (so I thought). After I went in explanning my problems, he started to scold me this and that. He said some words that truly hurt me. Childish for climbing over. Fine.

I realize after that, come to think of this, I shouldnt have go to seek him. Later I came back, I become more depressed. Lots of stupid thoughts come. I didnt do. I try before by drinking detergent.

I know God will be mad at me if i ever do it. the thoughs never stop appearing. Some of them know I am depressed. they never come. Some did. I figure all of us need a good listener instead of a good advice giver or those who thinks he is clever.

Now, I am the only christian in my house. Instead of showing a good testimonial. I quit going to church. My mum become happier coz I am no longer going. I no longer know how to open the way for them.

Out of sudden, I realize the ppl in my church is like avoiding me. So i decided so they wont be able to avoid me, I quit. But I will not give up on God. I will try to go to other Church.

Thsi is my story.

 

[wingcross]

I am not sure if i ever forgive my Pastor. I dun hold grudges. But he causes many problem later on by sharing with other ppl.

I dun know whether this is the work of the devil. To me, it is. To some, it might not.

I cant sleep now. I had depression for a few weeks. maybe it is migraine.

 

[BlackRain]

i'm so sorry that your pastor hurt you. when you say he shares with other people, are you meaning he shares stuff about you? if so...that's not right at all.
keep pressing on. i'm glad to hear that you're not giving up on God. you're right, you need to find another church where you are welcomed and feel at home. you need to be around people who lift you up not bring you down.

 

[wingcross]

I went to many churches before... I realize man always judge ppl by their performance.. If they know you are a lawyer or high social level, they talk to you nicely. If you arent, they think you are kids.

It seems all teh church have such problem. They come to church, but with with business intention. They come with big cars, everyone tends to flock to them.

Those who are nobody, are avoided. I was Left alone.

 

[Jeremiah31_3]

I know the feeling man, i've gone through a number of churches where i felt i didn't fit in, and even a couple where *even worse* i felt i did fit in but that god didn't want me to be there. it just takes time man, god has a place for you and he loves you more than you could possibly imagine and he has a better plan in mind for you that you would ever think you could deserve. just give it time, and never give up on god coz he'll always be there for you. god bless man, be safe and i'll be praying for you.

 

[wingcross]

I do wonder ...if there is still a SINCERE christian fellowship ?

everytime, there will be a hidden agenda in any fellowship. Someone will be showing off something. Some are comparing. And the worst, I hate Pastor who claimed He was told by God to go to place and he keep on telling ppl he dun like the place God asked him to go.
Then dun go, dun obey God.

I am sorry, i was looking for a place to unleash my anger and my sorrow.
I dunno about your guys, but i felt sometimes i made the worst decision being a Christian.

I feel happy sometimes. I feel lifted up. Man, I am so unstable. I felt I am going crazy.
I getting the feeling, the devil are going to get me. All the headache are starting to pour in.

I dun have anyone to approach. Is ok, God lead me to this forum. I learn to pray for others. When i feel headache, i come here.

 

[mikeforjesus]

I think you should go and tell your pastor how u feel and if he doesnt listen and apologise then get some brave good christian friends who understand and if he still doesnt repent.. then u can leave him alone and go to another church. Coz Jesus said to do this. It doesnt matter if he is a priest or a pope. Everyone has weaknesses.
And if you wont feel welcomed after this then find another good bible based church that teaches truth and whom u can fellowship with.
God be with you brother.

 

[Sojourner<><]

Hang in there bro! Just remember WWJD (What Would Jesus Do?).

God bless you and take care!

 

[wingcross]

I must learn to forgive him first. He is just a human after all.