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Bear attack

JuliusStClair

Author of The Angelic Testament and The Deadly
May 9, 2012
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An atheist was taking a hike through the woods, when he came upon a meadow. The sun was shining, there were butterflies fluttering through the air, and a bubbling brook streaming by. The man was admiring the view when suddenly he heard a loud crash behind him. He turned and saw a great big, hungry bear running toward him. The man turned around and started running for his life, but no matter how fast he ran, the bear kept getting closer and closer. Finally, as the bear was just about to swipe him with its big, sharp claws, the man dropped to his knees and cried, "JESUS, please help me!!"

Thunder rumbled, and everything around the man came to a stand-still. The butterflies were frozen in mid-flutter, and brook was frozen in mid-babble, and the bear was frozen in mid-swipe. As the man looked around him in awe, a loud voice was heard from Heaven.

"You know, you have some nerve, calling on me after all these years. You have denounced me, ridiculed my ways, and refused to believe in me, and NOW you want me to help you?"

The man replied, "Lord, I know I've done all these things, and I am so sorry! If you can forgive me, would you please just grant me one thing?"

The Lord replied, "Well, I am the forgiving type. All right, I'll give you one wish. What would you have me do?"

The man said, "Please make this bear a Christian."

After a pause, the Lord said, "All right, I will make this bear a Christian."

And slowly, the world came back to life. The butterflies started fluttering again, the brook started bubbling again, and the bear started moving again. The bear caught itself, stopping itself from swiping the man with its sharp claws.

Instead, the bear got down on its knees, bowed its head, and prayed, "Lord, please bless this food I am about to eat..."
 

Hestha

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An atheist was taking a hike through the woods, when he came upon a meadow. The sun was shining, there were butterflies fluttering through the air, and a bubbling brook streaming by. The man was admiring the view when suddenly he heard a loud crash behind him. He turned and saw a great big, hungry bear running toward him. The man turned around and started running for his life, but no matter how fast he ran, the bear kept getting closer and closer. Finally, as the bear was just about to swipe him with its big, sharp claws, the man dropped to his knees and cried, "JESUS, please help me!!"

Thunder rumbled, and everything around the man came to a stand-still. The butterflies were frozen in mid-flutter, and brook was frozen in mid-babble, and the bear was frozen in mid-swipe. As the man looked around him in awe, a loud voice was heard from Heaven.

"You know, you have some nerve, calling on me after all these years. You have denounced me, ridiculed my ways, and refused to believe in me, and NOW you want me to help you?"

The man replied, "Lord, I know I've done all these things, and I am so sorry! If you can forgive me, would you please just grant me one thing?"

The Lord replied, "Well, I am the forgiving type. All right, I'll give you one wish. What would you have me do?"

The man said, "Please make this bear a Christian."

After a pause, the Lord said, "All right, I will make this bear a Christian."

And slowly, the world came back to life. The butterflies started fluttering again, the brook started bubbling again, and the bear started moving again. The bear caught itself, stopping itself from swiping the man with its sharp claws.

Instead, the bear got down on its knees, bowed its head, and prayed, "Lord, please bless this food I am about to eat..."

Haha. Christian or not, the bear still acts like a bear.

I do find it ironic that the atheist man would pray to Jesus. He's an atheist. Atheists do not pray to Jesus, unless they have been acquainted with Jesus, God, and et cetera earlier in their childhood; otherwise, they would probably just look for a practical method to get rid of that bear and avoid getting eaten.
 
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