Are You Still Friends With Your Ex?

[angeleyes56]

Might seem like a silly question, but hey, I can't be the only one!

I was married for 3 years and now divorced for 3 (I ask that you please not judge, everyone has a reason for their own walks in life). My ex-husband and I never had any children, luckily. It did not happen immediately, but we became friends after about a year after we divorced. Everything wasn't always civil, but once all the tension died down we grew to respect each other again. That respect turned into a friendship. We are now much happier and in much better places in our lives. It allowed us to grow and become the people we were supposed to become. We had biblical reasons to divorce, but because I am still very new, I won't speak of it just yet.

I believe for any relationship, it takes 100% on both sides, and a friendship is no different. He and I are much more open now as friends than we ever were as a married couple. He is now engaged to this wonderful woman. She is just as sweet as she can be, and her and I have become close. She knows everything about my ex and I and after getting to know me, she has no problems with it at all.

So, enough of my little story haha!

If you are, please explain how you were able to still be friends.

If you are not, would you ever consider it?

Also, this is open to both male and female to answer. Please be respectful to the others who have responded. This can be ex-boyfriend(s), ex-girlfriend(s), ex-wife(s), ex-husband(s).

 

[Messy]

We're friends, but since he is going to marry again I don't just hang out with him or speak about personal stuff. I go to his church and we have 3 kids, we're friends and his wife to be is nice, but he's not like a real close friend, just normal. I was there to talk about the kids with someone and she left and he had to go to his girlfriend, so he kinda wanted me to go lol and I joked: Hey let's go chat for hours.

 

[High Fidelity]

Still friends

 

[Miss Spaulding]

Don't have an ex.

 

[angeleyes56]

That's great, especially because of you have children. If that is what works for you and your family, then that is great!

 

[markvs]

Not at all friends. She was coming to my/our church early on, but when she decided to leave town she did not come back.
Because she "feared that I might become violent" ( groundlessly I might add ) she has not allowed me to know where she and the 2 girls live, effectively cutting all contact. These two factors make any sort of friendship unavailiable.

 

[Neve]

I've never had a "boyfriend." But no, I am not friends with any guys I have dated.

 

[Gnarwhal]

To an extent yes. My ex-wife is already getting remarried, so it wouldn't be appropriate for us to hangout, but if/when we see or talk with each other we regard each other as friends. I speak highly of her to anyone who may know her, and I still refer clients to her for business. I have no reason to speak poorly of her, she's an excellent person with a good heart and a sweet spirit and I just want her to be happy.

She's the only one though, the other girls I've dated not so much.

 

[angeleyes56]

I just wanted to make it known to others, even though my ex and I are friends now and are much better off that way, after our divorce, there have absolutely been no lines crossed at any time. When we do "hang out" it is all together and in a group of other people. He and I usually are never alone, and his fiance and I are closer friends.

 

[High Fidelity]

I just wanted to make it known to others, even though my ex and I are friends now and are much better off that way, after our divorce, there have absolutely been no lines crossed at any time. When we do "hang out" it is all together and in a group of other people. He and I usually are never alone, and his fiance and I are closer friends.

That's cool.

I've had quite a few girlfriends, but I've never really felt that I couldn't speak to them afterwards.

I mean, if you were together in the first place, surely there's a lot that attracts you to them as a person and their personality. So even if the relationship didn't work out, they should at least make a good friend you would have thought.

 

[SnowyMacie]

Some yes and some no

 

[GQ Chris]

No, not at all.

 

[angeleyes56]

That's cool.

I've had quite a few girlfriends, but I've never really felt that I couldn't speak to them afterwards.

I mean, if you were together in the first place, surely there's a lot that attracts you to them as a person and their personality. So even if the relationship didn't work out, they should at least make a good friend you would have thought.

 

[angeleyes56]

My ex wasn't a bad person. He and I just weren't meant to be married. We went in with the wrong mindset, and I believe that is what was wrong. Had we done what we wanted and not what we thought others wanted us to do, it could've save us both a lot of time and heartache. Unfortunately, we learned the hard way, but I wouldn't change it because we both are better people because of it today, and I am closer to God than I have ever been in my life.

 

[Strider1002]

Friends on Facebook with one... but actually friends? No.

 

[sparkydave]

We were friends for a while afterward, but haven't talked in a year or so. If I hear anything from her, it usually starts with something like "I've just been so busy...". Funny, that was her number one excuse during our short marriage.

 

[Nom De Guerre]

My best friends are both of my ex fiancee's.

 

[vanillaicecream]

Bump.

 

[TheGirlOnFire]

Mines is coming here tonight eeeeekkkkkkk breathe breathe Katniss... Breathe

 

[vanillaicecream]

As for me, nope. I'm not friends with him.