Are You "Out?"

[Barzel]

Do your friends/family know you have bipolar disorder? I'm not shy about my illness, so I find myself talking to others about it often (even strangers). I've met some stigmas as a result, but I've also gained a few friends because I was willing to be open.

 

[quietpraiyze]

I'm all the way out! My family totally rejected me in this area. Not once did any of them ever ask about my illness. It may be cultural though. Culturally African Americans don't deal well with mental illness. It's not high on their list of priorities. Once in college, I learned all about the brain and bipolar and that changed my life. Everything that “christians” had said about my illness was wrong. From that point on I was free and I never looked back. I'm open and honest about being bipolar and how it affects my life. I still run into “christians” who want to judge me but I'm good. I know while their judging me, God is looking right at them, so it's all good. Most unbelievers I have dealt with have been way cool about it though...go figure...




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[Barzel]

I'm all the way out! My family totally rejected me in this area. Not once did any of them ever ask about my illness. It may be cultural though. Culturally African Americans don't deal well with mental illness. It's not high on their list of priorities. Once in college, I learned all about the brain and bipolar and that changed my life. Everything that “christians” had said about my illness was wrong. From that point on I was free and I never looked back. I'm open and honest about being bipolar and how it affects my life. I still run into “christians” who want to judge me but I'm good. I know while their judging me, God is looking right at them, so it's all good. Most unbelievers I have dealt with have been way cool about it though...go figure...




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That has been similar to my experience. I have a few friends who have been interested, and my mentor (who has bipolar) has been interested. My sister asked a few questions, but my Dad has barely sat down to hear about it. I tell him, "Dad, we need to sit down and talk about a safety plan." He says, "okay," and that's the end of it. I get that people aren't going to put their lives on hold for me, but they don't understand that bipolar disorder can be potentially lethal.

It took me being hospitalized in May for a manic episode to catch my Dad's attention, but now when he sees me agitated or depressed, he tells me that "bipolar is no excuse for acting that way." He also told me to "unagitate" when a bunch of our extended relatives made me really angry by inviting themselves into our home to stay when they came for my Mom's funeral; they couldn't have been bothered to come up to see us the twenty years previous, and all of a sudden we were supposed to resort to sleeping in the garage during the winter because they wanted to attend the funeral. I was squeezing the ever-loving whatsit out of my stress ball, but I didn't say anything and I played nice. Yet, I'm not supposed to "act out" in front of guests.

My experience with Christians has been largely negative. I've been told that preparations and plans for emergencies are unnecessary because "their God wouldn't let that happen." I'm told I have a lack of faith, that I just need to reject "the curse of bipolar," and that I don't need meds, I just need prayer.

Non-Christians, on the other hand, have been accepting and cautious. They ask me--sometimes too much--if I'm okay with what they're doing.

 

[quietpraiyze]

I'm sorry your dad is that way. There are many people that don't even believe that mental illness is real. If they do some of them think you can turn it off and on. Which of course we can't. When I'm in a high or low I can't just get out of it. It doesn't work like that. I have to ride it out. Sometimes I make it through and sometimes it's a hospitalization. ​

I like that - “unagitate”. I don't know if it's a bipolar thing or not but I know I can't stand people who try to play “mind games”. They do something, you call it for what it is, and then you're the one with the so called problem. I can't stand it. I've always done better with those who are straight about who they are and what they're doing. Unfortunately in my life experience that's not been a lot of “christians”. To me many “christians” are passive aggressive and will lie or try and deflect when called on it. The lying is amazing. Truth is I can only take “christians” for so long then I have to get away. I know that sounds bad but it's true.​

Maybe it's just me but as bipolar 1, I don't like people trying to play with my reality and quote Scriptures to me at the same time if that makes sense...​

 

[Barzel]

I'm sorry your dad is that way. There are many people that don't even believe that mental illness is real. If they do some of them think you can turn it off and on. Which of course we can't. When I'm in a high or low I can't just get out of it. It doesn't work like that. I have to ride it out. Sometimes I make it through and sometimes it's a hospitalization. ​

I like that - “unagitate”. I don't know if it's a bipolar thing or not but I know I can't stand people who try to play “mind games”. They do something, you call it for what it is, and then you're the one with the so called problem. I can't stand it. I've always done better with those who are straight about who they are and what they're doing. Unfortunately in my life experience that's not been a lot of “christians”. To me many “christians” are passive aggressive and will lie or try and deflect when called on it. The lying is amazing. Truth is I can only take “christians” for so long then I have to get away. I know that sounds bad but it's true.​

Maybe it's just me but as bipolar 1, I don't like people trying to play with my reality and quote Scriptures to me at the same time if that makes sense...​

I totally get that. I'm a person who looks at Scripture and sees that God has my back, but that He also expects me not to be stupid. Just because He says I could handle a snake without being bit doesn't mean I'm going to try to check a cobra's tonsils. I trust in God for the best in the midst of the worst.

Faith--real, legitimate faith--fixes us and helps us. Religion that coerces conformity is vile and dangerous and foolish. Unfortunately, when you're a person of faith in the midst of religion, you suffer through it. As a person with bipolar 1 disorder, I do take exception with someone questioning my reality by quoting Bible verses, especially when they say, "my God," as though I somehow serve a less powerful God.

 

[quietpraiyze]

Thanks for getting it and I agree. God is my no.1 comfort. I know he's with me and for me. Vile is a good word to describe religion like that. I really suffered at the hands of religion when I was a babe in Christ. I've always known had I not really been Born Again and knew some of the Word, those people would have destroyed me. I made it out barely with my faith but my life was in shambles. God has really restored my life.​

It's also true what you were saying about how bipolar can be lethal. So many people don't understand that until something is on the news about a mentally ill person being killed or committing suicide. Way deep on the inside I think, could have been me. Mental illness is no joke.​

 

[Jeshu]

Yes I also found that faith in God has been my number one support getting through the downs of my illness, while religion has been the biggest hinderer of them all.

Faith in God's loving truth is awesome. I found that once we read the bible spiritually then it always speaks true.

For when we physically get bitten by a snake we could easily be in deep trouble - though I have faith that such is in God's hands as well I would still get a doctor to give me some anti-venom - but when we get spiritually bitten by The Snake then holding onto God's loving truth will render the Snake Bite completely harmless.

Paul tells us that God's Word is written by The Holy Spirit to spiritually discerning people. Once I started reading The Bible like that - faith in God's loving truth stood out to be a major winner.

 

[Yusuphhai]

my mental handicapped identity is open. Just because i am handicapped i can get a job serving for the handicapped in my community for the government, although i feel all kinds of pressure.