Are Any Dating Sites Worthwhile?

[Doctor Strangelove]

Does anyone have an opionion? This is something I have wondered about but am uneasy about. Is there any point in trying when you have high standards and would rather remain alone than be "unequally yoked." I can imagine most sites cater to the "hook-up" crowd and I want nothing to do with that. I have wondered about e-Harmony and some "Christian" sites. I don't know. I am putting myself out there more in real life but there are not a lot of activities for singles my age. So I am wondering if there is anything online that could be worthwhile.

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

I personally have not tried any. But 3 couples in our bible study met online. I believe 2 of them were E-harmony and the other was Christian Mingle. The latter is the young couple. Not sure if that makes a difference or not.

 

[dayhiker]

5 years ago I was on dating sites and found a great lady that I was with for 4.5 years.

But it appears that things have changed, as I've only had one date from a dating site last year.

I think the better thing to do now is to go on meetup.com and sing up for groups that match your interest. Say hiking, movies or something. We have a meetup here I attend quite a few functions, meetup/social fun. They have almost 6000 members with 50 organizers and over 10 meetups a week. I've done as many as 3 in a weekend. People are friendly and willing to talk. Swap phone numbers and see where it goes. Or just have fun getting out of the house.

Tho I'm having the most fun in the personal growth groups, I find they have a love ethic of love, some are Christians. I get to witness a lot at them. But I'm guessing those would be outside your comfort zone.

 

[live2dt]

Hi everyone. I have tried both christian and non-christian sites and had some very bad experiances. I have decided to never try online dating sites again.

 

[Doctor Strangelove]

Yes, I have heard horror stories.

 

[CounselorForChrist]

Theres pros and cons to dating sites (christian or not). Its online so people can lie about themselves. Sometimes people who are online usually do so because they "want" list is so ridiculous that they can't find who they want offline. And of course there are always those who are out so scam.

With all that said there are MANY couples who have met online and are now married. It doesn't hurt to try them. For me being shy it helps me to talk to women without fear of being bashful in person. After awhile you learn from looking at profiles whos who and what you need in a person. Some sites are better then others. Many I know who are married met through ChristianMingle. Some I know met through non-christian sites like Eharmony.

Given my circumstances of being disabled I found many friendly women on ChristianDatingForFree. Alot of the people there are legit. Granted it does have alot of foreigners. But don't let that scare you. All to often americans can be judgmental of someone from another country. Its pretty easy to tell a scam artists from someone who is real. Scam artists ask for money within a week of knowing them. If you send nothing they never reply again. Problem solved.

Just like real life dating there are always risks. There alot of filipino women at CDFF. And there are a few who are there to scam. But most of them are loving godly women who really do want a good christian man since filipino men are...less then christian sometimes. Men there may be christian but they are more controlling of the wives. My rule of them for CDFF is look at the forums or in the chat rooms. Those are where the real people tend to hang out.

I received many messages from varied dating sites. Again for me the biggest problem because me being disabled. So its why I had literally thousands upon thousands of women reject me. So even if your not disabled accept the fact there will be rejection. THat and often dating sites keep profiles of those who no longer go to the site. So you may like a member who hasn't been on since 2010.

In the end I see nothing wrong with dating sites. Often because of all the questions they ask for your profile you can tell right away if someone may work with you or not. Some sites like Eharmony have algorithms to match you to other people who want you want. Only thing is be aware that many sites don't let you contact the other person, as in they want money to do so. Its why you are allowed to send "winks" or default messages like "I am interested in you!" So if you get one back you know to sign up because someone does want to talk.

Which is why I prefer CDFF since its all free. No catches. It is a smaller site overall but like I said more real people. Over the years now many of the sites do have more scammers or bad people at them. But theres not much you can do about that but be aware for signs of those people.

 

[miss-a]

Though I've yet to find the right person, I've tried online dating sites in the past and met some very nice men. With one we actually got to the telephone stage and had a blast talking. But we ended up with irreconcilable doctrinal differences and parted peacefully. Another very nice guy just wasn't over his ex-wife and didn't realize it but I could tell. He just wasn't ready, so I didn't encourage him. There are also mini-horror stories like the guy who chose the username "scary1." But the thing is as Xfreak said, you quickly learn to spot the scammers, and it goes without saying, I never even ready scary1's message to me.

So since I just signed up for one a few hours ago, I'd have to say I'm willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. As with you, Strangelove, I don't get many opportunities to mingle with Christian singles, so ChristianMingle it is for the next 3 months, but prayerfully.

What I did was search the site for a few weeks while praying about actually paying so I could participate. I was only going to join for a month, but as it happened the very weekend, that is yesterday, that I decided to go ahead and give it a try, they had a sale so for 15 extra dollars I got 2 additional months. Fyi the sale ends tonight.

I mentioned I did this prayerfully. I'm not saying I felt the Lord for sure leading me in the direction of the site, but I also felt no big red lights or red flags, so for now I'm in.

Hope that helps,
a

 

[miss-a]

Oh, and I also have close friends who met online, good, solid mature Christians who are now happily married.

 

[Jenster]

I have friends who met their spouses on eHarmony, Christian Mingle, Christian Cafe and even Match.com (though that was awhile back). I tried a few, and probably even have my profile still out there somewhere, LOL, but fortunately was able to meet my bf through church.

The funny thing is that a few friends who met and married were from generally the same social circles -- they just hadn't been introduced. The fear is that you're going to meet crazed or even dangerous strangers, but in a few friends' cases, they met someone they could've met by going to the right party at the right time.

It does seem that any opportunity to develop a friendship over time would be the best way to go, whether that's through chat forums like CF or chat rooms on some of these dating sites.

Also, I got a few dates through Facebook with men I'd known slightly and then reconnected with via FB. When you go through FB, at least the person is a friend-of-a-friend, and therefore hopefully more normal.

 

[CounselorForChrist]

On a really creepy side note. I remember using christianmingle and I really liked this totally blind woman that lived locally. We chatted back and forth and we were attracted to each other (well more I to her since she couldn't see me). So one day she called and my mom answered. When this woman said her name my mom asked her questions. Turns out shes a cousin. More so my one aunts sister in law adopts this girl. So that just made it to creepy for me and we stopped talking lol.

 

[artqween]

Does anyone have an opionion? This is something I have wondered about but am uneasy about. Is there any point in trying when you have high standards and would rather remain alone than be "unequally yoked." I can imagine most sites cater to the "hook-up" crowd and I want nothing to do with that. I have wondered about e-Harmony and some "Christian" sites. I don't know. I am putting myself out there more in real life but there are not a lot of activities for singles my age. So I am wondering if there is anything online that could be worthwhile.

They cAn somewhat dangerous.
Ur best bet is meeting someone
Face to face.. Such as in ur local
Church,.. People there can just write
Things to get attention possibly in
My opinion. thats when a long walk
In ur neighborhood, thats when true
Chemistry can happen. Smiles can
Exchange etc.. "O la la... "o btw..
Hi and plezd to meet u. Drstrangelove. Interesting user name.

 

[Doctor Strangelove]

Welcome to CF, artqween! Yes, meeting people can be dangerous. Especially as our culture promotes all sorts of weirdness and there is no end to scams.

I have kind of a dark sense of humor (within tasteful limits) and I am a Peter Sellars fan so I thought this would be a fun screen name.

 

[artqween]

Welcome to CF, artqween! Yes, meeting people can be dangerous. Especially as our culture promotes all sorts of weirdness and there is no end to scams.

I have kind of a dark sense of humor (within tasteful limits) and I am a Peter Sellars fan so I thought this would be a fun screen name.

Hi doctor strangelove..
I was referring to those dating
Services u mentioned.. When I
Said that in my opinion.

 

[dayhiker]

I've meet many many people in the last year. No bad encounters. Might be that guys are lucky cause women aren't bad! But the guys I've talked to have been nice as well. There are a lot of ways around here to get out and meet people that would be fine even if there were a couple of weirdos around.

 

[artqween]

I've meet many many people in the last year. No bad encounters. Might be that guys are lucky cause women aren't bad! But the guys I've talked to have been nice as well. There are a lot of ways around here to get out and meet people that would be fine even if there were a couple of weirdos around.

Cool im glad u luckd out.. Ha love ur user id... ;-). plezd to meet u dayhiker.. And hi

 

[miss-a]

I just thought of another somewhat important detail when particpating in online dating. It's good to have a thick skin. I didn't recall that until today. I messaged someone yesterday who lives relatively nearby and our profiles seemed a good match. He didn't answer. Not even a no thanks. I'm not all that thick skinned so I welcome your prayers. I'd forgotten that aspect of it. but I think I'm ready-ish now.

 

[dayhiker]

artqueen,
Thanks. What part of the world are you?

Hey, I see how your art side likes a creative text. But I find it a little hard to read. Probably a smaller font would work for me better.

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

artqueen,
Thanks. What part of the world are you?

Hey, I see how your art side likes a creative text. But I find it a little hard to read. Probably a smaller font would work for me better.

I was wondering why she was yelling LOL, just kidding!

 

[dayhiker]

I can understand artsy flair. It sure adds beauty to the world. Yet a massage board is about reading and the flair is for those with a knack for putting words together! Of which I have just a little flair!

 

[Spunkn]

My brother met his wife on a dating site for Christians. It can happen, but you do need to be pretty careful, and I think the chances of things not working out from a dating site are definately higher than someone you met in person. But that's not saying it can't work. Espcially if you get a little help from God