anyone feel closer to one of your children than others?

[Yoona86]

I bring this up because I feel this is such a taboo subject in Western society, especially in Church.

For me, I can see why that might be, as a good parent would never admit this to their children for a good reason, but the reality is I do think if we are honest with ourselves, when you have more than one kids, it is inevitable that you will feel closer to one than others.

And personally I don't think there is anything wrong with that, as it is just human nature, as long as you love them the same in a sense you love them all unconditionally and you treat all of them fairly.

anyway, for myself, I recently had my baby daughter, and I have admit, even though at this stage I feel this incredible intense maternal bond with her, it is still not the same as the bond I have with my twins boys.....

 

[TruelyLiveForHim]

well, not a parent myself

but as a son, I have always been my dad's boy

I am close to my mum as well, but my relationship with my dad has always been special, and I know I am the apple in his eyes too.

 

[Sabertooth]

As they get older, some will show more devotion to the family and your values, as parents. Others will feel like they need to pull the family in a different direction, resulting in a power struggle. There is a greater sense of unity with the former and a greater sense of disunity with the latter.

 

[PrincessSnowflake]

I bring this up because I feel this is such a taboo subject in Western society, especially in Church.

For me, I can see why that might be, as a good parent would never admit this to their children for a good reason, but the reality is I do think if we are honest with ourselves, when you have more than one kids, it is inevitable that you will feel closer to one than others.

And personally I don't think there is anything wrong with that, as it is just human nature, as long as you love them the same in a sense you love them all unconditionally and you treat all of them fairly.

anyway, for myself, I recently had my baby daughter, and I have admit, even though at this stage I feel this incredible intense maternal bond with her, it is still not the same as the bond I have with my twins boys.....

I have 3 sons and a daughter. My bond with my daughter was just as amazing as with my boys.

 

[Krystina661]

I have 2 boys. 13 and 6. I love both of them with all my heart and my love for them is the same. But I feel closer now to my 6 year old. With my teen it is changing a little. He's becoming a young man! He is not as reliant on me like when he was little, although needs mom in different ways. So in a way I feel closer and needed more by my little guy. I think it's normal to feel a stronger bond at certain times of your children's life. In my opinion that is normal.

 

[MountainBluebird]

Yes, I have three children, and some days I feel closer to one of them than to the others.

 

[digabeatle]

I have a 7 1/2 year old and a 13 month old (both are boys) and I feel a-lot closer to my 7 year old I think its cause he and I were alone and each others only company for so long when he was little (until age 5) but with my youngest I have to divide my attention betweeb him and brother which makes it harder to have the same kinda attachment that I did with oldest In time i will become more attached im sure but I still believe the first born child always holds a special place in a moms heart.

 

[beaverpond]

My daughters always want me and their mother at every school event. However because of my wife's work schedule and the fact that she is part of the management team where she works she is unable to make to many of these events. She feels so bad about that.

I on the other hand am on the PTA, the school board, and head the youth program, I also try to make as many school related events as I can without getting in the way of the teachers and administrators...because of me being on the school board, I am around in the different schools a lot. So I try to stay out of the way as much as possible. Anyway, my girls always know that I am there for them when they are sick, when they have to go to the doctors, when they need to go to the hospital, and special school functions...we also do father / daughter activities.

 

[surrealist247]

Oh please don't let your daughter ever find out. My mother told me that she never fully bonded with me when I was a baby and ouch that hurt..

 

[beaverpond]

I can say that when my wife and I are both around...my daughters would rather do things with my wife and leave me behind. While it hurts to some extent, I do know that there are times I wish I had times to myself and don't have it. So I look at both sides and take it as it comes. I sometimes wish we all had times together besides the dinner table.

 

[Odetta]

I actually go back and forth. For a time, I felt closer to my youngest, because he likes to cuddle more, and is more conversational. So I had to make sure I deliberately spent time with the oldest. Now I'm feeling closer to my oldest, because we're dealing with some issues with him and I'm having to spend a lot of time reminding him he is loved. Which means I have to make a conscious effort to make sure I'm doing the same with my youngest.