My ocd does not let me enjoy life and tells me to do certain compulsions and tells me stuff like
OCd: you may have made a promise to God, to do this or not to do that.
It is so tiring and exchausted.
ocd then suggests me stuff like
ocd: do you worries if you do not do the compulsion? you cane make a new promise without your will to God that will be about not doing the tiring ocd compulsion. in that way, you wont have worries for not doing the ocd compulsion.
Automatically, some thoughts and words without my will happen in my head for a second that I know they are without my will but somehow they affect my worries, When thoughts without my will suggest about not doing the compulsion, even thought I know they are thoughts without my will, they relieve me and some more random thoughts without my will happen as an excuse to my ocd worries like
me: (thoughts without my will) maybe I must not do now the tiring compulsion because of the unwanted thoughts that happened. yay! I am freet o do what I want.
it happened again days ago, and I even predicted that ocd will suggest me to make without my will a fake promise just to relieve myself from the worries of not doing a certain compulsion. everything happened so fast. I think 1-2 seconds. very randomly and subconscioucly. I do not even remember the words or the thoughts that happened without my will.
ocd then gives me new worries like
ocd: did you just make a new promise not to obey the compulsion? what will happen if you do the compulsion?
me: nothing. doing or not doing the compulsion are just thoughts without my will. I never made a promise.
ocd: maybe you allowed the new thoughts without your will to happen in your head and pretented that it is ocd. maybe you were carefree and tried to make a promise to God in order to force yourself out of the compulsion. maybe they were thoughts with your will and you pretended they were not. maybe they were thoughts without your will but you allowed them for 1-2 second to happen. maybe they were thoughts without your will but since they relieved you from the worries, maybe that made them valid.
I do not know. it is not the first time this happens, many times I find myself in situation and worrying that what if I made a new valid promise just to stop the compulsions? what if it is so fast that I cant remember right? it is like automatic.
I have prayed to God and told Him that there will be times that my ocd will try to trap me and relieve me from thoughts without my will and compulsion and I may find myself worrying that I may have made a promise. I asked Him to protect me from those unwanted fake promises. but that time, I was so carefree. what ?
OCd: you may have made a promise to God, to do this or not to do that.
It is so tiring and exchausted.
ocd then suggests me stuff like
ocd: do you worries if you do not do the compulsion? you cane make a new promise without your will to God that will be about not doing the tiring ocd compulsion. in that way, you wont have worries for not doing the ocd compulsion.
Automatically, some thoughts and words without my will happen in my head for a second that I know they are without my will but somehow they affect my worries, When thoughts without my will suggest about not doing the compulsion, even thought I know they are thoughts without my will, they relieve me and some more random thoughts without my will happen as an excuse to my ocd worries like
me: (thoughts without my will) maybe I must not do now the tiring compulsion because of the unwanted thoughts that happened. yay! I am freet o do what I want.
it happened again days ago, and I even predicted that ocd will suggest me to make without my will a fake promise just to relieve myself from the worries of not doing a certain compulsion. everything happened so fast. I think 1-2 seconds. very randomly and subconscioucly. I do not even remember the words or the thoughts that happened without my will.
ocd then gives me new worries like
ocd: did you just make a new promise not to obey the compulsion? what will happen if you do the compulsion?
me: nothing. doing or not doing the compulsion are just thoughts without my will. I never made a promise.
ocd: maybe you allowed the new thoughts without your will to happen in your head and pretented that it is ocd. maybe you were carefree and tried to make a promise to God in order to force yourself out of the compulsion. maybe they were thoughts with your will and you pretended they were not. maybe they were thoughts without your will but you allowed them for 1-2 second to happen. maybe they were thoughts without your will but since they relieved you from the worries, maybe that made them valid.
I do not know. it is not the first time this happens, many times I find myself in situation and worrying that what if I made a new valid promise just to stop the compulsions? what if it is so fast that I cant remember right? it is like automatic.
I have prayed to God and told Him that there will be times that my ocd will try to trap me and relieve me from thoughts without my will and compulsion and I may find myself worrying that I may have made a promise. I asked Him to protect me from those unwanted fake promises. but that time, I was so carefree. what ?
