Anyone else cant get friends?

I have very few friends. I like to say "quality rather than quantity" is what matters.

I live in a rural area. The county I live in is almost as big as a tiny country yet the number of people that live here would likely not fill an apartment or condo complex in a major city.

For me I can say I do not necessarily seek more friends. I greatly appreciate the ones I do have.

I can be quite stand-offish and not very personable. I won't change just to be accepted by someone; however, I know I need to work on being more approachable.

KJ91 said:

For sure im brutally ugly, 1 of 10 on the look scale. Being that ugly scares away people.

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You must have incredibly high standards for looks! I still don't agree you're ugly. I think you're above average. Definitely greater than 5 on the look scale.

If you're scaring people away, it's definitely not your looks. What would you want out of friendship anyway? As for me what I want out of friendship is to be able to do things I find enjoyable with other people. For me, it can be a lot of things like hanging out in the mall, watching movies, cheap fast food, all-day hiking or biking in the mountains, silly road trips. If I had a boat or knows a friend with one, I might do silly boat trips too. I know it's shallow and juvenile but I find them fun.

KJ91 said:

When it comes to my IQ, same there, compare how i write and formulate myself to how others do, im by far the dumbest poster on this forum.

Yes i did a iq test with my therapist, it showed my iq is far below the average ones. Many have told me that i am dumb as a rock.

No, it does not make it easier to make friends when you have low iq, it makes it harder. when you are dumb, its not eazy to be a intresting person and hard to make a conversation going.

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One of the metric for IQ is speed or how fast you process information. I don't agree with it. I think it's real silly. What if nobody's in a hurry? What if nobody cares if you finish sooner or later? Then it's useless!

So you maybe just slow or just need a boost in confidence.

ThisIsMe123 said:

I had a new guy at work notice that "Hey, doesn't anyone around here gather together to get dinner after work" you, like you see in TV sit coms? lol one guy wanted to get people to go bowling after work, and i was like pulling teeth. Some were kind of bit turned off by it.

People just want to get the heck home and crash. But where I live,it's mostly family oriented, so people aregoing home to their kids and spouses.

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In one of my job in another country, it was like military environment. Since all their families are back home, me and my co-worker friends watched movies together every Friday after work. It may include hanging out in the mall, shopping, eating dinner together in the mall, and buying groceries together before went to someone's flat and watched movies, sometimes with beer.

We did go bowling after work on few occasions.

It really wasn't my style at first. I am an introvert. I used to want to get home alone as quickly to play video games or watch some TV series or movies by myself or do some serious hobby stuff like DIY.

But hanging out with friends doing silly and shallow things grew on me and now I really miss doing silly things with other people. As an introvert for most of my life, it's convoluted for me to say, it's a lot more fun to be with other like-minded friends and don't mind doing silly things.