quatona
Studies have shown that kids are better off with their biological parents.
I have given you some hints what my doubts are concerning the validity of such a broad conclusion. Simply repeating your opinion in return doesn´t help the discussion.
Just biological blood connection. There is evidence that this is important.
And I am asking: Important for what? Important in which way? Important towards which goals? Important with which hidden criteria in mind? Etc.
There is some sort of connection between blood.
Yes, there is certain "some sort" of it. But that there is "some sort" of connection doesn´t help establishing that it is the very sort you are assuming and claiming it to have.
I mean what are we really saying that nature doesn't matter anymore.
There is it again: A whiny "the sky is falling" strawman that is simply a discussion stopper. Nobody said that "nature doesn´t matter anymore", nobody even said that blood relations don´t matter at all.
Why do you keep doing this with me?
Just get a man and women to donate some sperm and eggs and anyone can be their parents. We are already going down that track of playing God and we have already seen what can happen with the rent a womb situation.
Irrelevant ramblings and slippery slope strawmen.
Where do you draw the line.
That´s exactly the question: Where do we draw the line, and why?
Your habit of presenting broad generalisations, slippery slopes and apocalyptic scenarios of "nothing matters anymore", however, are not helping to discuss this question - it is a reliable way of shooting it down.
Like I said it maybe early days but there is a small amount of data. But we may have to wait years to see what the end results will be.
Then don´t jump to conclusions based on inconclusive data. Don´t pretend the data allow for such conclusions.
But I know and society knows from past experiments and playing God its not always a pretty one.
This is a thread about secular arguments - so God doesn´t belong here.
Besides: If humans have done wrong decisions in the past, this is not an argument against a specific proposal for the future, anymore than against any other proposal.
It reeks of fundamentalist traditionalism.
We humans have a tendency to make decisions now and pay the price in the next generations.
Yes. Is that an argument against making decisions in general? If it is not, you would have to show how this would be a decision that we will regret in the future. This is the very topic we are discussing, and bringing up a good reason for why a decision needs to be considered thoughtfully is obsolete in a discussion in which its aspects are being considered.
I though he made some sense.
Of course you did - he agreed with you, after all. I´m just not seeing how saying "See, this guy agrees with me" adds any weight to your opinion - unless he were an authority on the matter.
What is a father, is he not needed anymore.
A more precise question would be: What is the inevitable consequence of growing up without your blood father?
If you´d interested in investigating the issue (instead of grabbing for everything that might confirm your preconceived notions and asking discussion stopping strawman-questions, you´d be interested in asking and answering such precise questions.
If you go into some of the psychology of it fathers are needed for young boys growing into men.
Needed? There are war generations in which a considerable amount of boys grew up without fathers, and they did grow into men. So what exactly are you talking about?
Women are needed they have a maternal instinct and a connection with their babies. They can breast feed and that bond is important. I would think you dont need surveys for that. That is just natural.
There is a difference between pointing out advantages and claiming necessities. Children do have grown up without mothers, so "they are needed" is way too broad a statement.
You should try to say what you mean to say, and as precisely as possible.
I would have a guess that yours is not to far off mine. See I just made a statement of my belief. I didn't say anything about anyone or qualify it in any way.
Well, you talked about studies and their alleged results. I entered the discussion to point out why I wouldn´t believe a study to allow for such broad conclusions as you made it. That was all. You are the one who doens´t focus on the points made. Your or my beliefs are irrelevant here.
I think its others who are taking it there more than I am. I just think because a believer states something in these matters people have to go on the defensive and disagree no matter what. But what am I saying thats so radical. I am just saying that the two most natural people , thats the ones that make love to have the baby are the best people to have that child if all things are equal and they are in a happy relationship. I think people in the US have to many extremes that they think everyone must have some sort of agenda.
You may want to complain about that to people who think all this and do all this. Whining to me about stuff I haven´t done while ignoring what I actually said leaves me frustrated.
Well thank you that I can have this view. I stated that view and some shot me down. But the point is I should be able to have that view without going to extremes.
Quite obviously you are able to have your views and you are able to express your views. What you are not able to is expressing your views without people disagreeing with you.
See you assumed that just because I made that statemnet that I was rejecting anyone who didn't fall into the accepted group.
Where did I assume that?
When I clearly said I am not saying anything against gays or single parents.
Well, when you point out that a blood-father and a blood-mother are "needed" for a child to grow up, you
are saying something against single or gay parents: That children do not get what they "need" when growing up this way.
I was just stating my opinion and what I believe what the data is indicating.
This is not what you did. You claimed that this is what the result said. You made it even look like the researchers concluded so.
This is what I was saying you cant even express an oponion without people jumping up and down. But its others who turn it into an us and them issue not me.
Yes, most every issue finds some people to make them jump up and down, on both sides.
However, you neither have any indication that I am jumping up and down nor that I am turning this into an us vs. them issue. So what´s the point in bringing your perceived victim status up in our conversation, instead of addressing the arguments?
For me I can go and get plenty of stats and I would have said what I said if I hadn't done the research first.
So you presented inconclusive stats as being supporting your views. I do not see the point in doing this. That´s all I meant to say right from the start.
But its more about the simple logical point of view that the natural thing of the mother and father of the baby are best if they are in a loving happy relationship because its just natural and healthy in may facets.
So you are appealing to what oyu feel is "common sense", and you can do that all you like. (You are just not going to convince anyone by saying "it´s obvious to me, that...").
However, it´s a different thing when you start talking about studies confirming your view.
So a lot of it is based on natural common sense and you dont need an expert or survey to tell you. I know I would like a dad to turn to as I grow up. I would feel left out simple as that.
Your common sense, you personal wishes and your anecdotes are just that.
Pointing to them, however, is stopping a discussion rather than helping it.
But I really don´t know why I have myself drawn into these unfocussed exhaustive tangents.
I made a simple point: What you presented as research results confirming your opinion can´t do what you claimed them to do.
That´s all.
Yes but I can talk about these things without going into some personal agenda. It doesn't matter to me its just a topic that should be able to be discussed.
Well, I am here to discuss it, so what am I to do with your endless complaints about the inability to discuss, about your victimization, about the sky falling etc.? All these ramblings leave me with the impression that you actually do
not want to discuss it. On top, appeals to common sense are discussion stoppers also. So I am increasingly left with the impression that you don´t want to discuss it because you have no arguments.
If you want to discuss it, start doing so already.
I thing the US especially have many extremists and they get polarized where as in Australia we could talk about this topic at the table with even gay people and it would get to out of hand. Just people expressing their views.
I am not a US citizen, and I am quite able to discuss even the weirdest stuff without flying off the handle.
If you feel uncomfortable with the way your statements are received, that´s one thing.
Accusing others of jumping up and down, of being unable to discuss without things getting out of hand, of having a personal agenda, of turning things into an us vs. them issue (all these complaints you have issued in this one post) is a completely different thing - and all it does is distracting the focus from the topic.
If you want to discuss, bring up arguments.
If you just want to say your opinion, don´t be surprised when others don´t discuss with you - because that doesn´t even allow for a discussion.
And better not be surprised to find people on a discussion board disagreeing with you.