Another OP about being called to the ministry.

[imperfectchristian]

I have wanted to write this OP for a good long while.

I have felt a call on my life ever since I was a young man (preteen).

To make this OP as easy as possible to evaluate I will provide a positive and negative list about myself. Although self evaluation has it's obvious limitations, in this situation, I feel it is the only way to effectively communicate the things I wish to communicate in this medium to what I would think would be a far more objective audience than my family, friends and namely myself.

So without further delay.....

POSTIVES:

1. Confirmed calling in many ways from many different people across a spectrum of denominations.

2. A passion for the Words of Christ and for the teachings in the Bible.

3. Have been taught since I was very young from Christian principles and values and also the Word of God itself.

4. An overwhelming desire to share the Word of God with others, and to help others better understand God's love and will for their lives so that they may live better and so that their joy may be full.

5. To correct and insrtuct, in meekness, love, understanding and compassion, whenever the opportunity arises, misconceptions about God, Jesus and His church.

6. A desire to live rightly before my family and others.

7. A very real knowledge of my own weaknesses and imperfections that go with being in a corruptible body.

NEGATIVES:

1. Extreme uncertainty that I could ever live a truly Godly example with a reasonable amount of consistency.

2. Mistakes and sins in my past that I feel would cause many that know me to scorn me and say I am a hypocrite and that would cause some, perhaps many to be offended, not to mention cause me a great deal of despair.

3. An ever struggling, imperfect being. I fail everyday to live up to the Christian standard, sometimes very noticably. Many times I find the desire to live a life pleasing to God to be more like an ember than a flame and very, very rarely a roaring flame....Or perhaps it would be better stated that many times when the opportunity arises for me to be able to forget about the more serious things in life I jump at the chance, becuase of the lack of resolve I find inmyself concerning those same things.

4. A very present and very real uncomfortable concern that I might perhaps just be dreaming all of this up in my mind in order to subconsciously fulfill some hidden selfish agenda of my own and that God is not really calling me at all....Alothugh I really don't think so...for what it is worth, but then again I could not see myself displaying the life sacrifice of someone like mother teresa either.

5. An ongoing battle for me and my wife with a very noticable shortcoming and bad example....smoking cigarettes.

I have been reluctant to write this because I was afraid of how it might come across. For it is hard for anyone to judge or counsel another without actually getting to know the person first. Nevertheless, I feel that an outside evaluation is a strong asset to anyone contemplating decisions such as these.

And I also believe that in a multitude of counselors their is safety, even if part of those counselors are impaired by the lack of being physically present with the one being counseled.

Thank you for time in this matter.

 

[followtheWay]

It is tough, not knowing you. Here are some things to consider, however. I am going to write this as though you are considering pastoral ministry, though you may be thinking of some other form.

None of us are perfect. There are no perfect pastors, either. But, the Bible gives us a list of characteristics that are required of one who would be in pastoral ministry. 1 Timothy 3 and Titus 1 list those characteristics. I suggest you examine those characteristics, and see if you meet the criteria. If you do not, don't despair. Use them as your personal goal sheet to work towards becoming the kind of man God wants to use in ministry. Whether you meet the criteria or not, I recommend you arrange to meet with your pastor and possibly some other spiritual advisors/examples to invite them to examine your life and help you see what is there. Also, consider if your wife is with you in this process. I have seen various men's ministries hindered by unwilling wives, or by wives that themselves would not live exemplary lives.

If your family and friends will be honest with you, ask their input as well. I recommend meeting with them individually, and give them the list from those chapters of Scripture, and ask them to take the list, consider if you meet the criteria, and meet with them again to go over their thoughts. This is a hard process, but it can be extremely enlightening.

I hope this is helpful to you. Let the Scripture and the Spirit be your Guides.

 

[imperfectchristian]

It is tough, not knowing you. Here are some things to consider, however. I am going to write this as though you are considering pastoral ministry, though you may be thinking of some other form.

None of us are perfect. There are no perfect pastors, either. But, the Bible gives us a list of characteristics that are required of one who would be in pastoral ministry. 1 Timothy 3 and Titus 1 list those characteristics. I suggest you examine those characteristics, and see if you meet the criteria. If you do not, don't despair. Use them as your personal goal sheet to work towards becoming the kind of man God wants to use in ministry. Whether you meet the criteria or not, I recommend you arrange to meet with your pastor and possibly some other spiritual advisors/examples to invite them to examine your life and help you see what is there. Also, consider if your wife is with you in this process. I have seen various men's ministries hindered by unwilling wives, or by wives that themselves would not live exemplary lives.

If your family and friends will be honest with you, ask their input as well. I recommend meeting with them individually, and give them the list from those chapters of Scripture, and ask them to take the list, consider if you meet the criteria, and meet with them again to go over their thoughts. This is a hard process, but it can be extremely enlightening.

I hope this is helpful to you. Let the Scripture and the Spirit be your Guides.

I think you give excellent advice. Perhaps the best one in my situation could ask for.

I have considered many times 1st Timothy (paul's advice concerning those who would seek to become a sheperd and I think the prerequisites are at the very least, profitable to all forms of ministry.

I can already tell you that I do not live up to these standards and yes it is the desire of my heart to make these standards the practice of my own life.

I also know God will justify anyone He calls.

I feel called to music ministry in some way...whether it be directing a choir, playing the piano/keyboards/guitar or back up singing or leading worship.

Since I was a child, I have felt compelled to be invovled in some way and have actually been involved for a good long time in music minisrty. But it has always been in an unoffiicial capacity, which is the way I like it (no strings attached), but I feel I am being pressed to move beyond that.....beyond my comfort zone and into a deeper conviction.

 

[wayoutsidethebox]

t1wGl,

As I sit and read your thread, I'm almost in tears. You have captured the last two and a half years of my life.

I was a musician at my former church. My calling is pastoring.

Since October of last year I have been stuck on that fence with you. Am I able to live holy before God as an example to my fellow man? What about those people who knew me yesteryear, when I wasnt trying to live with any purpose in my life?
I was also asking why my musical skills and abilities plateaued. Why am I so frustrated Sunday after Sunday? Why do these songs not minister to me and why are they so easy or boring to play?

Since then, I've moved on to a new church. I'm not involved in music here. (even though it burns me to hear things being played incorrectly) After speaking with my new pastor about being called and explaining to him that I was stuck in a quagmire questioning myself and God, he reminded me that I will not be doing things based on my own strength.
He was encouraged by my hesitance and my concern for not tarnishing Gods ministry with my dirty hands. He reminded me of several instances in the OT where people were called to do and offered several reasons why they couldn't.
Even though I had already been led to those scriptures in my personal study, they seemed brand new and jaw-droppingly profound. Have a look at Joshua 1.

I say all this to say to you: don't worry about 'you' in this situation. Focus on Him and His will being executed. Focus on the lives that will be touched, saved and encouraged because of your music and yielding.
Rely on Him to give you guidance, strength, provision and reward.

While I have the floor... Not that you will do it again nor that you do it regularly but, please don't downplay music as ministry. Please dont allow yourself to think that its just a gig. Early in the Book, the tabernacle musicians were also of the tribe of Levi. They were held to same devout lifestyle as the priests.
It is imperative for musicians to have a healthy, fruitful relationship with God. Music ushers us into the presence of God. The praise that is born from our lips and fingers lingers in His nostrils like a pleasing aromatic fragrance. The more we pour ourselves into this ministry the more He will meet us in that ministry.

Please dont let satans sneaky little play of words cause you, nor any of us, to not give God what He deserves: unfettered praise.

Im sorry for unloading on you but this is important to me.

 

[imperfectchristian]

t1wGl,

As I sit and read your thread, I'm almost in tears. You have captured the last two and a half years of my life.

I was a musician at my former church. My calling is pastoring.

Since October of last year I have been stuck on that fence with you. Am I able to live holy before God as an example to my fellow man? What about those people who knew me yesteryear, when I wasnt trying to live with any purpose in my life?
I was also asking why my musical skills and abilities plateaued. Why am I so frustrated Sunday after Sunday? Why do these songs not minister to me and why are they so easy or boring to play?

Since then, I've moved on to a new church. I'm not involved in music here. (even though it burns me to hear things being played incorrectly) After speaking with my new pastor about being called and explaining to him that I was stuck in a quagmire questioning myself and God, he reminded me that I will not be doing things based on my own strength.
He was encouraged by my hesitance and my concern for not tarnishing Gods ministry with my dirty hands. He reminded me of several instances in the OT where people were called to do and offered several reasons why they couldn't.
Even though I had already been led to those scriptures in my personal study, they seemed brand new and jaw-droppingly profound. Have a look at Joshua 1.

I say all this to say to you: don't worry about 'you' in this situation. Focus on Him and His will being executed. Focus on the lives that will be touched, saved and encouraged because of your music and yielding.
Rely on Him to give you guidance, strength, provision and reward.

While I have the floor... Not that you will do it again nor that you do it regularly but, please don't downplay music as ministry. Please dont allow yourself to think that its just a gig. Early in the Book, the tabernacle musicians were also of the tribe of Levi. They were held to same devout lifestyle as the priests.
It is imperative for musicians to have a healthy, fruitful relationship with God. Music ushers us into the presence of God. The praise that is born from our lips and fingers lingers in His nostrils like a pleasing aromatic fragrance. The more we pour ourselves into this ministry the more He will meet us in that ministry.

Please dont let satans sneaky little play of words cause you, nor any of us, to not give God what He deserves: unfettered praise.

Im sorry for unloading on you but this is important to me.

It is quite alright. It is so much easier in one sense to just let go (or try to) and not worry about all these things and just go on living life, but at the same time it is as if something has grabbed ahold and will not let go, and constantly drawing me back to thoughts, dreams and visions of worship and filling me full of the desire to worship in music and song above and beyond personal worship.

For a long time now I have been in a sort of standoff (for lack of a better word) between myself and God...please do not think me irreverent...where I agreed to do whatever God asked as long as He would give me the ability to do it and give me the ability (or perhaps I actually meant a better ability) to live a life of standard.

I know this sounds silly, because we are told in Scripture that God always equips those He calls and that He will not give us anything above our ability to handle.

Honestly I am not sure what to think anymore. Perhaps it has been my own misunderstanding one way or the other.

One thing I do know is that God is with me, that He cares about the little things in my life. That it is all in His hands and everything will eventually work together for good. I know God will use me in some way and I trust that whatever that is, God will lead me to it.

 

[wild01]

I have gone through a lot of those same questions myself. If you are waiting to become good enough for ministry, well, thats just never going to happen. none of us will ever be good enough for ministry. If you look at the writings of a lot of spiritual powerhouses throughout history, you will see one common theme-the closer they became to God the more they became aware of their total and complete unworthiness.
Right now I am in a ministerial training program, I know I've been called into ministry and I am attempting to pursue that call. looking back on my life though I can honestly say that the call started WAY before it would have been appropriate for me to follow it right into pastoral duities (think augustine's pre conversion lifestyle) but now after having struggled with these doubts for years, I realize that the call will never go away. and the only way I can progress in life is to follow it the best I can.

It's kind of like a conversation I was having with my pastor a couple weeks ago. he's been a pastor for over 20 years and he was commenting about how he has kept a copy of every sermon he has ever given, but he can't bring himself to recycle them because every time he pulls one of his old sermons out, he can no longer in good concience teach what he taught in them.

we will always keep growing in our faith, and where we were last year will hopefully always be a step backwards for us spiritually, thats what growth is all about.


anyway thats my $.02 for what its worth.

 

[GregoryTurner]

I must admit I am having the same struggles of being scared. Not being good enough or worthy enough. This thread is great and I think there could be a bond happening here. I am for getting to know each other better and encourage and help each other as we all pursue the things God has in store for us. PM me and let me know if there is anything that I can do. I pray God's direction, peace, and guidance be with us all as we embark upon the greatest journey we could ever attempt... to do the will of God in our lives...in the name of Jesus I pray. Amen.

g

 

[imperfectchristian]

I have gone through a lot of those same questions myself. If you are waiting to become good enough for ministry, well, thats just never going to happen. none of us will ever be good enough for ministry. If you look at the writings of a lot of spiritual powerhouses throughout history, you will see one common theme-the closer they became to God the more they became aware of their total and complete unworthiness.
Right now I am in a ministerial training program, I know I've been called into ministry and I am attempting to pursue that call. looking back on my life though I can honestly say that the call started WAY before it would have been appropriate for me to follow it right into pastoral duities (think augustine's pre conversion lifestyle) but now after having struggled with these doubts for years, I realize that the call will never go away. and the only way I can progress in life is to follow it the best I can.

It's kind of like a conversation I was having with my pastor a couple weeks ago. he's been a pastor for over 20 years and he was commenting about how he has kept a copy of every sermon he has ever given, but he can't bring himself to recycle them because every time he pulls one of his old sermons out, he can no longer in good concience teach what he taught in them.

we will always keep growing in our faith, and where we were last year will hopefully always be a step backwards for us spiritually, thats what growth is all about.


anyway thats my $.02 for what its worth.

Very insightful. that is greatly encouraging to me. What a great answer. I will have to think about that for awhile.
God bless.

 

[imperfectchristian]

I must admit I am having the same struggles of being scared. Not being good enough or worthy enough. This thread is great and I think there could be a bond happening here. I am for getting to know each other better and encourage and help each other as we all pursue the things God has in store for us. PM me and let me know if there is anything that I can do. I pray God's direction, peace, and guidance be with us all as we embark upon the greatest journey we could ever attempt... to do the will of God in our lives...in the name of Jesus I pray. Amen.

g

Somehow.....someway.......Amen

 

[kingdomseek4]

God bless you all. It seems most of you have had or do have the fear of being rejected because you think you are not good enough. We are not good enough. [I know that somethings have already been said. I just may say them a different way.] The bible says that there is no one good no not one. There is none righteous.
Gen 3:9-11 "Then the Lord God called to Adam and said to him, 'Where are you?' so he said, 'I heard Your voice in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; and I hid myself. And He said, 'Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree of which I commanded you that you should not eat?' " One thing that happened in the fall was the fear of rejection. Or the fear of not being good enough. I asked the question one day, 'What happened in the fall to cause man to have this irresistable fear of being rejected?' When someone does not know that a person loves them unconditionally, they will have the fear of confessing things to that loved one. [I am not talking about confessing faults, I want to deal with the rejection and acceptance.] Adam hid himself because he was afraid. Afraid of what? He was afraid of God rejecting him because of what he had done. So when we think we do not measure up then we begin to hide and find excuses for our inadequacies. When we are we then we are strong. I would most gladly boast in my weaknesses that the power of Christ may rest upon me. His strength is made perfect in weakness. So how do we deal with the feeling of rejection? We need to know who Christ is, who He is in us and who we are in Him. Eph 1:3-14 I will just point out some things the Lord says about His saints. Since I mentioned that word, saints, let's look at it for a moment. Every believer is a saint. If you look at Paul's letters, you will see who he wrote to. He wrote to the church which he also addresses as saints. Now looking at Ephesians. Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has BLESSED US with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, Just as He CHOSE US in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having PREDESTINED US to ADOPTION AS SONS by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will, To the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He MADE US ACCEPTED IN THE BELOVED. In Him we have REDEMPTION through His blood, the
FORGIVENESS of sins, according to the riches of His grace which He made to ABOUND toward us in all wisdom and prudence, having made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His good pleasure which He purposed in Himself, that in the dispensation of the fullness of the times He might gather together in one all things in Christ, both which are in heaven and which are on earth-in Him. In Him also we have obtained an INHERITANCE, being predestined according to the purpose of Him who words all things according to the counsel of His will, that we who first trusted in Christ should be to the praise of His glory. In Him you also trusted, after you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation; in whom also, having believed, you were sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise, who is the guarantee of our inheritance until the redemption of the purchased possession, to the praise of His glory.

Blessed be the name of the Lord. He has blessed, accepted, and chosen us before the foundation of the world. While we were dead in our trespasses and sins Christ died for us. Just as you believed in for salvation, believe on Him to make you who He wants you to be. God bless you all.

 

[mystery4]

God is only able to use humble instruments. Your questioning of whether or not you are good enough, shows you are in a position where God can use you, because you learn to rely upon his strength and not your own.

I have but one piece of advice for you... If there is anything you can do besides pastoring, then do it.