another day of failure

[unclean]

Im new here, but not new to the struggle of porn addiction and masturbation. Although I didnt discover porn until my late teens, I remember vividly masturbating in my crib as a baby. At that age there is no knowledge of right or wrong, just what feels good. By the time I entered kindergarden I was masturbating on a daily basis. At age 11 I gave my heart to the Lord, but I continued to touch, unable to stop the lifelong activity. I have gone a time without it, prayed for release from it. Ive cried in ernest and repented only to return to it again and again and again. Its a demon I cant shake for long and I feel as though Ive placed another stripe upon the flesh of the Savior when I fail. There is no good thing in it. After [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] I feel so empty and shamed. I cant claim the ignorance of my youth, I know better now. I cannot tell you how many times images pass through my mind, like an endless bombardment of porn. My flesh craves it, my spirit despises it, and mo man can serve two masters.
I hope you will forgive my long post, but I needed so badly to say what I have said. Thank you for hosting this forum because its badly needed.

 

[unclean]

I want to thank everyone who has taken the time to send me an encouraging message or to lift me up in prayer. Thank you all so much! For the first time in my life I feel like I can share these burdens. God bless you.

 

[Laurel Crowned]

Hi unclean...

I could identify with your post. I don't know if you've heard of this website... but it is a wonderful community for Christians who struggle with porn, masturbation, and other sexual addictions.

http://higher-calling.com/

There is also a really good accountability software called X3 watch. You choose an accountability partner who will be notified if you visit porn sites. Because of these two sites I will be porn free for two full years come March. Check them out you might be blessed.

 

[unclean]

Hello Laurel & thank you so much for the websites. I had heard of a few websites but these I had not heard of. I'm really anxious to check them out. I cant emphasize enough how good it feels to finally face this without trying to handle it myself. Your victory of two years porn free is further encouragement. God bless you.

Rick

 

[Johnnz]

You obviously are very sexually aware,even from a young age. Demons won't be the real source of your sexual urges, but they will utilise it to turn you towards unhealthy sex.

You probably have a pretty negative attitude towards your sexuality because of your behaviour. That will not be very helpful for you.

You can learn to avoid bad stuff such as porn, but you are will need to work through how you will live with a sex drive as a single person. This will require getting some really balanced, healthy information, thinking, and setting some longer term goals.

John
NZ

 

[sinneD]

Check out the Mens' Corner. There is a Porn Addiction Support section.

It is located here --->> http://christianforums.com/f214-pornography-addiction-support.html

 

[deke123]

The Lord Will Provide, Trust Him! Praying For You.

 

[leftBrainer]

Dear unclean,

wow... you bear a great burden upon your shoulders.

nothing I believe impossible for God. How many days are you living in purity now? I really hope you can post in this thread 'no porn and masturbation for a month'... a 30 days challenge, I will be praying for you throughout your journey.

O hey, you might want to try this site: www.settingcaptivesfree.com it is GOOD man. choose a course for suites you(I'm taking the purity challenge) and get started, this course has brought many to their salvation, including me and I hope it will work for you too.

A happier life in purity,
LeftBrainer

 

[jsu5381m]

You obviously are very sexually aware,even from a young age. Demons won't be the real source of your sexual urges, but they will utilise it to turn you towards unhealthy sex.

You probably have a pretty negative attitude towards your sexuality because of your behaviour. That will not be very helpful for you.

You can learn to avoid bad stuff such as porn, but you are will need to work through how you will live with a sex drive as a single person. This will require getting some really balanced, healthy information, thinking, and setting some longer term goals.

John
NZ

What do you mean by long term goals?