I
Inperfected
Guest
I sent this as an email over a year ago to my 'now' fiance... He was just a "friend" then... Isn't it interesting how sometimes pain canm bring out the most insight in someone... I just love reading over it as it gives me insight into feelings of many people not just me... Read and enjoy, but remember few details that would identify me have been removed...
Me? I'm inperfected, a 18 year old girl from ................. My favourite
colour is pink, and favourite smell is "grapefruit". In the past year
i have learnt many things. Number 1 is give all you have, it's all you
have. But in the same way i've learnt another lesson. If you give all
of your emotions away, you have excatly that left. Nothing. But when
that's what you have always done, since the first time you learnt to
trust someone, it's harder than you would imagine to hold back the
emotion and the trust.
When you get to the beginning of a new year, and realised you've
played your best friend, you forget where or how to turn. The words
"breaking up ain't easy" course thorugh my head. However it's not
actually breaking up, and it's worse than that, becuase it's your
bestest friend. It's that person who you lean on when stuff gets too
tough, and the one who now sums up the quote, "what do you do when the
only one who can dry your tears is the one who made you cry". But then
you see, it's not for your sake you can't go to him, but for his. You
want to protect his heart.
and then you see that speaking in the third person, is so much less
emotional and painful, than the first person.
Maybe it's time for a break, maybe we are just to push on through.
Maybe it's time for this friendship to end.
I never wanted to hurt you. You are my best friend, i wanted to love
you, yet hearts can't be forced.
I'm sorry ...........
Me? I'm inperfected, a 18 year old girl from ................. My favourite
colour is pink, and favourite smell is "grapefruit". In the past year
i have learnt many things. Number 1 is give all you have, it's all you
have. But in the same way i've learnt another lesson. If you give all
of your emotions away, you have excatly that left. Nothing. But when
that's what you have always done, since the first time you learnt to
trust someone, it's harder than you would imagine to hold back the
emotion and the trust.
When you get to the beginning of a new year, and realised you've
played your best friend, you forget where or how to turn. The words
"breaking up ain't easy" course thorugh my head. However it's not
actually breaking up, and it's worse than that, becuase it's your
bestest friend. It's that person who you lean on when stuff gets too
tough, and the one who now sums up the quote, "what do you do when the
only one who can dry your tears is the one who made you cry". But then
you see, it's not for your sake you can't go to him, but for his. You
want to protect his heart.
and then you see that speaking in the third person, is so much less
emotional and painful, than the first person.
Maybe it's time for a break, maybe we are just to push on through.
Maybe it's time for this friendship to end.
I never wanted to hurt you. You are my best friend, i wanted to love
you, yet hearts can't be forced.
I'm sorry ...........
