- Jan 16, 2019
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The OP is addressing “angry men” who feel disenfranchised not all anger issues.
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disenfranchisement
Am I missing something here? How does the word disenfranchisement relate to all anger issues?
- the state of being deprived of a right or privilege
Anger happens because they are deprived of a right or privilege?
I am not sure that I subscribe to the "caveman DNA" argument, but if my anger is piqued by a perceived injustice, I
(My earlier police story is a good example of that.)
- Urgently seek to engineer a solution to it.
- Failing that, seek cover and maximize damage control.
Carrying that a step further, I was (inwardly) hypercritical of my wife when we were courting. I didn't expect her to be perfect --none of us are-- but I watched for her particular shortcomings. Had it been unfaithfulness or misandry, I would have bolted. The only thing that jumped out at me, was her being a bit selfish with treats. Annoying, but not a deal-breaker.*I ask specific questions and introduce discussions to gauge a man’s affinity with certain ideologies. If he leans in the wrong direction I’ll step back.
"Given to" typically means its your habitual response....I think an ''angry man'' and ''a man given to anger'' are different. An angry man implies he is in a constant state of wrath,due to his angry character. Given to anger,is what happens to all of us. Even Jesus became angry during his ministry.
Carrying that a step further, I was (inwardly) hypercritical of my wife when we were courting. I didn't expect her to be perfect --none of us are-- but I watched for her particular shortcomings. Had it been unfaithfulness or misandry, I would have bolted.
The OP is addressing “angry men” who feel disenfranchised not all anger issues.
I think anger is often intertwined with other deadly sins of greed, pride, and envy.
Sometimes people are angry because they couldn't get what they coveted, or because they are jealous, or because someone hurt their ego.
In these cases, we may need to address these sins along with anger, in order to get someone to a more healthy place.
And this is fitting. I've seen anger in people when I refused to answer to their greed, pride, or envy. They became angry being deprived/ denied of their wishes.
Expectations can incite anger. Especially when you believe you deserve a specific outcome. When it fails to materialize anger ensues.
That needn’t be anyone’s permanent condition. Prayer can soften an angry heart and affect the person’s countenance positively. I’ve seen it firsthand in those I’ve prayed for over a period of time.
Some people conflate the desire (and sense of obligation) to be a successful breadwinner with greed. But the curse in Genesis says that that drive will constantly be hampered (in this life).
I think that understanding that limitation and knowing Who to turn to can alleviate some of that frustration. Along with walking out Matthew 6:32-33.
And if you do not give this person attention voluntarily, he or she may not just end with one-time snapping.
He or she may try to get negative attention from you, doing things that would remind you of his or her presence every time.
I know a bunch of men, and I cannot think of one of them who's feeling disenfranchised as a man. So I'm wondering, what are these things men used to be allowed to do that they cant do now?
I don't know how, exactly, but coming up I understood that being a man was something I was to strive towards, not something that just happened or to which I was entitled. I was a sensitive kid and eventually learned that in spite of how I felt I was expected to do things. For instance, I might be afraid, but I was to do it anyway. Coming up, I had models I would look at and say, "That's a man. That's what it means to be a man."
I do wonder how much male disenfranchisement comes from loss of identity, an identity worth striving towards. Sometimes anger is rooted in fear, fear of loss. And then there's resentment towards the percieved cause of said loss.
What are the root causes of male disenfranchisement? How do we help them manage their anger in a healthy way? How have you tackled this within yourself or with others?
Please share your thoughts.
What are the root causes of male disenfranchisement? How do we help them manage their anger in a healthy way? How have you tackled this within yourself or with others?
Please share your thoughts.
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