Anger

[fireman1173005]

I have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder for about 3 years now and it seems to be getting worse. My doc is adjusting my meds to try to help but I have trouble keeping my anger under control. Anyone have this trouble and have any ideas for help?

Brian

 

[Willie T]

I have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder for about 3 years now and it seems to be getting worse. My doc is adjusting my meds to try to help but I have trouble keeping my anger under control. Anyone have this trouble and have any ideas for help?

Brian

Outside of God?

 

[quietpraiyze]

Hi fireman1173005 and welcome to the forum

At any time during the 3 years that you have been diagnosed with Bipolar have you ever taken the time to grieve the loss of your health? You might be grieving. You've experienced a major loss and from experience I do know that anger is a major part of grief and normal. You just need to deal with it in a healthy way. Talking about it can be a start.

Are you receiving Mental Health counseling along with your meds? If not would you consider it?

I'm gonna ask this because sometimes it's all in the mix but you don't have to answer. Are you angry with God but you can't “get” Him so you take it out on those closest to you? If so have you really sat down with God and told Him how you really feel about Him in all of this? I just want to encourage you that God can handle any and everything about you including what you have to say to Him. None of us are a mystery to Him. God is for you and He's for your marriage. He is right there with you but it's going to take some faith with works and consistency on your part. When you get some time read Hebrews 11th chapter and James 2:14-26.

You be encouraged. With God all things are possible.

*My post is regarding emotional anger due to loss and NOT abuse

 

[CraftyTurtle]

I just wanted to say that I have heard many people spout off about "God never gives you more than you can handle." Well that is cow-dung. The truth is that God never gives you more than you and He together can handle, and He is the one doing most of the work.

Now is one of those times in life where you are meant to turn towards God, not away.

Having said that, Anger is an issue I have had to deal with. I do think you men have more anger issues to deal with than us ladies. Testosterone, or something.
Does physical exertion help you? Punching a punch-bag, go running, chop wood.
On the flip side, there is meditation, oil-painting, yoga.

I found that avoiding a certain person that made me angry, was a huge help. It's only after a couple of years of me ridding myself of that person, that I am in a headspace able to actually confront him, calmly and purposefully, about how he treated me.

Only you know the situations (or people) that make you angry. Can you walk away? If so, what is stopping you? Pride? Revenge? Can you explain to whoever causes the problem the effect it has on you?

Are you angry with yourself perhaps? - You haven't achieved what you thought you should, and maybe someone is reminding you of your "failure". People only put others down when they feel downtrodden/misunderstood themselves.

Count to ten? My Mum used to do this, when dealing with my Dad (they are now divorced), and it always made us kids laugh when she grit her teeth and growled "one, chew, chree, frrrr, freve, shicks, sheven, ..... and then she'd laugh too.

Don't let people tell you that no one can make you feel bad - that it is your choice. That is another myth, perpetuated by non-bipolar people and daytime talk-show hosts. Bipolar is full of emotions which are not normal/appropriate, and are blown all out of proportion. We don't just "get over it". Whenever someone tells me to "get over it", I ask "How". They can't give me an answer.

So anyway, welcome to the forum. I hope you find some help and cameraderie here. Oh, and I am a fan of firefighters. I work with them in summer. We have terrible bushfires in my part of the world.

God bless.

 

[fireman1173005]

Hi fireman1173005 and welcome to the forum

At any time during the 3 years that you have been diagnosed with Bipolar have you ever taken the time to grieve the loss of your health? You might be grieving. You've experienced a major loss and from experience I do know that anger is a major part of grief and normal. You just need to deal with it in a healthy way. Talking about it can be a start.

Are you receiving Mental Health counseling along with your meds? If not would you consider it?

I'm gonna ask this because sometimes it's all in the mix but you don't have to answer. Are you angry with God but you can't “get” Him so you take it out on those closest to you? If so have you really sat down with God and told Him how you really feel about Him in all of this? I just want to encourage you that God can handle any and everything about you including what you have to say to Him. None of us are a mystery to Him. God is for you and He's for your marriage. He is right there with you but it's going to take some faith with works and consistency on your part. When you get some time read Hebrews 11th chapter and James 2:14-26.

You be encouraged. With God all things are possible.

*My post is regarding emotional anger due to loss and NOT abuse

I was seeing a psychologist for awhile, that's how I figured out I had bipolar. I felt like we didn't get very far, just more of a I talk she listen session. I needed someone to help me and didn't feel like I got that. I see a psychiatrist now whom she recommended who prescribes my meds but she doesn't counsel only gives meds. I am not mad at God at all, I pray for help with this, read scripture to find help daily. I am very mature in my faith and I am actually a pastor I'm just very new at the bipolar thing and having trouble dealing with my anger. I am better than I used to be but still have along way to go and my wife is just had enough I guess. I feel she doesn't understand, but I am just now realizing a lot myself I guess. Just looking to see how others cope. I feel I live in a shell due to being a pastor and I feel I almost have to hide my disorder at times from people because I'm not sure they would understand or would judge me.

Brian

 

[fireman1173005]

I just wanted to say that I have heard many people spout off about "God never gives you more than you can handle." Well that is cow-dung. The truth is that God never gives you more than you and He together can handle, and He is the one doing most of the work.

Now is one of those times in life where you are meant to turn towards God, not away.

Having said that, Anger is an issue I have had to deal with. I do think you men have more anger issues to deal with than us ladies. Testosterone, or something.
Does physical exertion help you? Punching a punch-bag, go running, chop wood.
On the flip side, there is meditation, oil-painting, yoga.

I found that avoiding a certain person that made me angry, was a huge help. It's only after a couple of years of me ridding myself of that person, that I am in a headspace able to actually confront him, calmly and purposefully, about how he treated me.

Only you know the situations (or people) that make you angry. Can you walk away? If so, what is stopping you? Pride? Revenge? Can you explain to whoever causes the problem the effect it has on you?

Are you angry with yourself perhaps? - You haven't achieved what you thought you should, and maybe someone is reminding you of your "failure". People only put others down when they feel downtrodden/misunderstood themselves.

Count to ten? My Mum used to do this, when dealing with my Dad (they are now divorced), and it always made us kids laugh when she grit her teeth and growled "one, chew, chree, frrrr, freve, shicks, sheven, ..... and then she'd laugh too.

Don't let people tell you that no one can make you feel bad - that it is your choice. That is another myth, perpetuated by non-bipolar people and daytime talk-show hosts. Bipolar is full of emotions which are not normal/appropriate, and are blown all out of proportion. We don't just "get over it". Whenever someone tells me to "get over it", I ask "How". They can't give me an answer.

So anyway, welcome to the forum. I hope you find some help and cameraderie here. Oh, and I am a fan of firefighters. I work with them in summer. We have terrible bushfires in my part of the world.

God bless.

I agree that I can't do it on my own, but with God anything is possible! I have learned to remove myself from certain situations to help with my anger, but sometimes I can have a great day and then just snap for no reason! It seems that usually it's over no big deal too. At the time I am really upset/mad but a few hours later I can look back and I don't even know why I was mad about it. I have been able to choose to be in a better mood or to have a better day but I have to be very conscious of this even.

 

[Loven God]

I don't have anger as far as wanting to hurt anyone or breaking things and such , but it has been 8 years since I was told I was bipolar and I still have pleanety of anger about that . I just can not seem to let it go and move on . the anger comes from how the bipolar has effected my life and I can not seem to get over it . I do not handle change very well .

 

[quietpraiyze]

I was seeing a psychologist for awhile, that's how I figured out I had bipolar. I felt like we didn't get very far, just more of a I talk she listen session. I needed someone to help me and didn't feel like I got that. I see a psychiatrist now whom she recommended who prescribes my meds but she doesn't counsel only gives meds. I am not mad at God at all, I pray for help with this, read scripture to find help daily. I am very mature in my faith and I am actually a pastor I'm just very new at the bipolar thing and having trouble dealing with my anger. I am better than I used to be but still have along way to go and my wife is just had enough I guess. I feel she doesn't understand, but I am just now realizing a lot myself I guess. Just looking to see how others cope. I feel I live in a shell due to being a pastor and I feel I almost have to hide my disorder at times from people because I'm not sure they would understand or would judge me.

Brian

I'm glad to hear that your relationship with the Lord is wholly intact. That's a good thing...the best thing! I want to encourage you to try again concerning Mental Health Counseling & Support for both you and your wife. I know sometimes it's hit and miss but don't give up. You have to be your own advocate. Where I live at we are able to see an assigned counselor anywhere from once a week to once a month on a continual basis. It's all a matter of what you feel you need. You decide what you want to work on and what you need support in. You can also pick your preference in gender of the the counselor. There are also support groups if you want to go that route. Do you have something like that available to you? I believe there is help and resources out there for you and that God can lead you to them. Ask your doctor again what do they recommend besides meds in terms of practical applications in dealing with the anger and ask for a referral if you need one. Contact your local Mental Health Agency and see what resources they have available.

This may seem redundant but if you haven't done it yet google “anger and bipolar”. Read the various articles and see if there's something there that can help you. Get as much info as you can. My anger has always had an origin and my bipolar has never really been a factor in that but I do know it's not that way for everybody.

If you haven't already, go to the Prayer Forum and ask for prayer. Also ask for prayer from those you know and trust if you can. I am praying for you as I'm sure many others are who are reading about your struggle. As you know God can do amazing things through prayer. You're not alone in this.

You be encouraged and remember,

Lam 3:21 This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope.
Lam 3:22 It is of the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.
Lam 3:23 They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.
Lam 3:24 The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him.
Lam 3:25 The LORD is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him.
Lam 3:26 It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the LORD.

It's not easy but God is for you and He's with you! May the Lord meet your every need. Peace be unto you and your wife.

 

[geek4christ03]

Dude im right there with ya. I used to be the chillest kid when i was younger but i got diagnosed about 4 years back and it has been a rough ride ever since. One minute your happy as a freakin clam then the next your going all hulk smash. I dont know why this happens but something that has really helped tame my temper is working out with free weights. Going to gym and lifting sweats off alot of stress and anger. Also getting away from caffiene for a while really helped to. Hope those can help you as well bro.

 

[fireman1173005]

Dude im right there with ya. I used to be the chillest kid when i was younger but i got diagnosed about 4 years back and it has been a rough ride ever since. One minute your happy as a freakin clam then the next your going all hulk smash. I dont know why this happens but something that has really helped tame my temper is working out with free weights. Going to gym and lifting sweats off alot of stress and anger. Also getting away from caffiene for a while really helped to. Hope those can help you as well bro.

I might need to get away from caffeine, I drink alot of tea! I used to drink pop but one of the side effects of, Topamax which I take, is a wierd taste when you drink carbonated beverages. So I don't like anything carbonated. So I drink sweet tea like it's going out of style. May have to slack off or quit completely.

Brian

 

[fireman1173005]

I had another big problem with anger that involved my wife last week and I have decided to seek help to try to save my marriage. I am seeing a Christian counselor next week and I am excited and hopeful that this will help!!! This counselor used to pastor and I know some pastors who have spoken highly of him so I feel confident in this decision. Please pray for me and him as we enter into this.

 

[quietpraiyze]